Whitt's End: 1.6.12

DALLAS (CBSDFW.COM) -  *After attending this week's Mavs-Suns game at American Airlines Center, I can confirm that Kim Kardashian's ass is in fact bigger than Rob Ryan's.

*No, I'm not alarmed by a Mavs' start that's slower than refrigerated honey. This will be a better, dangerous team come April. But after Thursday night's blowout loss in San Antonio make it three times in eight games that Dallas has trailed by 26 points or more. Ouch.

*How bad was Doug Free's season? The left tackle with the big contract was penalized a team-high 10 times and gave up nine sacks.

*Way back in training camp when the Cowboys were searching for offensive line help I suggested veteran Brian Waters. Experienced veteran. From Desoto and North Texas. But nooooooo. Instead the Cowboys stuck with the likes of Montrae Holland and Kevin Kowalski. The Patriots wound up signing Waters. Guess who made the Pro Bowl last week? Yep.

*The Rangers will likely sign Yu Darvish. But it won't be because of their recruiting trip. The Parks mall in Arlington? Sun 'n Ski sports to buy shoes? Really? At least take the guy to P.F. Chang's or Blue Fish.

*Hot.

*Not.

*Sorry, but I ain't buying the commercial where the chick climbs atop that tiny peak of a mountain. But I'm buying that "somebody left the gate ooooohhhhpen" is the most annoying hook of 2012. See here, this is how easy it is to trick-video somebody on top of that rock.

*I don't get fans who cheer for entire conferences. As a Texas fan, I never find it in my heart to root for OU or A&M. If you Tweet stuff like "SEC Domination!", I don't trust you.

*My apologies, Cam Newton.

*So by Feb. 1 the Rangers will have a Yu and the Mavericks will have a Yi. Yeah. Yikes.

*If you're one of the stubborn fans who believe "Jerry the owner should fire Jerry the general manager", you'll be on the side of Dale Hansen today at 5 on 105.3 The Fan when Greggo and I debate the iconic Channel 8 anchor on the job being done by the Cowboys' big boss.

*With Johnny Narron gone to coach in Milwaukee, the Rangers have hired Josh Hamilton's father-in-law, Michael Dean Chadwick, as the outfielder's "accountability partner." Addictions be damned, shouldn't the embarrassment of needing a babysitter at age 30 be enough to keep your nose clean?

*At 38 and with flecks of gray atop his noggin', former Mavs' face-of-the-franchise Michael Finley looked old at AAC last Wednesday. But apparently he's attempting to play his way back into the NBA, via the D-League and Frisco's Texas Legends. If he plays there, one of his teammates would be former Duncanville star Greg Ostertag.

*The rumor that won't go away is now one I don't believe, but nonetheless I can't get anyone with Texas ties to dismiss. Goes like this: At some point Mack Brown will move into administration to either replace or work alongside athletic director DeLoss Dodds and the Longhorns will hire as their next coach … Alabama's Nick Saban. I know. Just saying it won't go away.

*The older I get the more I enjoy sunrises over sunsets.

*Schedule won't be released until May-ish, but we do know the Cowboys' 2012 opponents. Away: Falcons, Panthers, Ravens, Bengals, Seahawks. Home: Saints, Buccaneers, Browns, Steelers, Bears. With New Orleans, Pittsburgh and Chicago coming to town, we're looking at multiple crowds of 100,000 at Cowboys Stadium next season.

*On my list of important Cowboys' free agents, it's Laurent Robinson, Tony Fiammetta and then … well, that's it. So long Anthony Spencer, Martellus Bennett, Keith Brooking, Bradie James, et al.

*If you need a DJ guaranteed to get the women to shake their booty, this is your guy. DJSC .

*Dirk Nowitzki this week surpassed two milestones. 8,000 baskets and 1,000 games. The first one is impressive because he rarely gets easy hoops, instead relying on pump fakes and fadeaways. The second is impressive because he's only the 11th to achieve it with the same team. The other 10: John Stockton (Jazz), Karl Malone (Jazz), Robert Parish (Celtics), Reggie Miller (Pacers), John Havlicek (Celtics), Hakeem Olajuwon (Rockets), Patrick Ewing (Knicks), Kobe Bryant (Lakers), Tim Duncan (Spurs) and Joe Dumars (Pistons).

*Give me Bengals over Texans, Steelers over Tebow, Giants over Falcons and Saints over Lions. I'll also take Arkansas to blow out Kansas State and LSU to roll Alabama. And, no, Oklahoma State didn't do enough to persuade us they are the best team in college football. They were at the mercy of a 32-yard field goal. It took luck for Stanford to miss the kick, but zero skill on the Cowboys' part.

*This weekend? Tonight it's the Cotton Bowl at Cowboys Stadium. Saturday and Sunday I might do a little shopping. Where's the best place to buy a grandfather clock in this town? Don't be a stranger.