Jasmine Sadry: Derek Jeter Asks, "Won't You Be My Neighbor?"

DALLAS(105.3 THE FAN) Leading off the "Jock Itch" for Today: Yankees "wonder boy," Derek Jeter is looking for a neighbor!

The New York Post is claiming that the Trump World Tower(where Derek lives now) has a unit available in his building. It's a 1,612-square-foot, two-bedroom, 2 ½ bathroom condo listed for just under a mere, $2.5 million bucks!

But, hey, it DOES also include a chandelier once owned by Marilyn Monroe, so I can completely see the justification in THAT price tag. (Please note heavy sarcasm in the preceding statement.)

If you do decide on being Derek's neighbor, I'll go ahead and give you the nosey neighbor "Gladys Kravitz" scoop and tell you that he's renting his two-bedroom condo for a cool $15,000 grand a month… www.nypost.com

And in OTHER "itch" worthy news…

Russ Ortiz was an All-Star during his 12 seasons in Major League baseball, leading the National League in wins for the Braves in 2003, and now he's saying that his salary was ridiculous!

In a recent interview with Jeff Pearlman, he talked about the adjustment from life in the big leagues to being just an average Joe like you or me.

He said: "It is a huge adjustment. You go from making big checks every two weeks to making no checks. Or, if you have to get a job, getting checks that don't compare. To put it in perspective, at one point I was making more than $400,000 every two weeks. It's for six months, but still, c'mon. It's ridiculous. We've been fortunate to have saved wisely, so I don't have to work. But the adjustment, at least for me, well, I believe for all retired athletes, is the responsibility. You are now in the real world."

Russ's "ridiculous" salary entailed just under $31,900,000 dollars from the Giants, Braves, Diamondbacks, Astros, and Dodgers during his career. If you do the math, he finished with 113 wins and 89 losses, so he earned roughly $283,000 bucks for each of those said victories.

"Ridiculous!" www.jeffpearlman.com

The hot new rumor circulating the NFL rounds is thatAuburn's Cam Newton might just be headed down the street from the White House to work for the Redskins!

According to an NFL Network insider, Michael Lombardi, he thinks that Mike Shanahan has his eyes set on two college quarterbacks in the draft, and Cammy boy is one of them!

The other, being Jake Locker!

He said, "When I look at Jake Locker, I see a guy that could fit what (Shanahan) does. He's looking for athleticism at quarterback. I could see Cam Newton fitting what Mike likes to do as well, assuming Cam Newton the person would be able to handle that. I see somebody that Mike feels like he could develop and be the kind of player that he could build his offense around."

Do the Redskins really think that the MUCH hyped Cam Newton could be the possible key to unlocking the traditional quarterback problems that have plagued them? www.blogs.nfl.com

Carolina Panthers quarterback, but more notably, Notredame's former snot-nosed little brat quarterback, Jimmy Clausen is allegedly hitting up chicks….on Twitter!

According to Bustedcoverage.com, he was caught on one of his creeping nights, and they captured a still shot of his tweet to some chick named, "Simplyflawless4."

His epic pick up line? "Live in SB?"

Jimmy, instead of wooing girls with your brilliant poetry, maybe you should just stick to illegally transporting alcohol in South Bend or getting punched in the eye outside of a pub.

But who know, if you follow Jimmy on Twitter, you'll find that there's all SORTS of jersey chasers who would spread 'em for Cam Newton's THIRD string backup for crying out loud! www.bustedcoverage.com

Sweet little previously incarcerated dog killer, oh yeah and Eagles quarterback, Michael Vick, says that he wants to copy LeBron James!

Now, hear me out LeBron.

Mike says that he wants to copy King James' business plan and the Wall Street Journal is reporting that his goal is to start his own marketing company in the next three years!

He says, "Eventually I wanna be able to sign guys to my brand. To let them be part of my company. Be it the advertising, working on the V7 clothing line, Team Vick shoe. What LeBron is doing, but its what I wanna do. I think I have an opportunity to do that, I think it will be great for players who are coming out of college, it will be great for players currently playing in the NFL to sign with Team Vick."

Yikes! I think we've all seen a glimpse of "Team Vick" before… www.wallstreetjournal.com

Poor chubby little chunk, JaMarcus Russell just can't win! First the former Raiders quarterback made the news rounds after reports claimed that he was in danger of losing his $2.4 million dollar house and NOW his life coach is dumping him!

Dumped by your life coach of all people!??!?

Yahoo! Sports reporter, Jason Cole, reported that John Lucas (who has helped numerous famous athletes turn their life around) has thrown his arms up in the air and given up on helping JaMarcus, recently asking him to leave Houston. Lucas started working with JaMarcus back in September, but has become SO frustrated with the his "lack of effort" (SHOCKING!) when it comes to training in hopes of another shot at the NFL, that he's just decided he's through and is giving up on arguably one of THE biggest draft busts in the history of the NFL.

In fact, things with JaMarcus were SO bad, that one source close to this whole ordeal said to the Yahoo! reporter: "The title of your article should be, 'It's Over! It's just amazing that you could say that about somebody who is 25 years old and just got drafted four years ago. But it's been almost a year since he got cut and there's no interest. Even before the lockout, nobody wanted to get near the kid."

Poor JaMarcus. Now he's REALLY gonna bury his sorrows in "purple drank" and pork rinds! www.yahoosports.com

FormerArkansas quarterback and current NFL draft prospect is hard-core street! Well, that is according to the NFL Network's Jamie Dukes!

In fact, he's SO "thug life" that Jamie compared him to Eminem and… Vanilla Ice! (Okay, Eminem I can understand. He grew up on the rough side ofDetroit. Vanilla Ice?? Didn't he grow up on the "hard streets" of Richardson,Texas like Beltline Road?!?!)

Anyway, Jamie's "explanation" was this: "For the lack of a better phrase, he's kind of the first — and forgive this phrase — kind of the Caucasian streetguy. And what I mean by that, he's got that Eminem, slash, ya know, Vanilla Ice thing that goes on.

"I just don't think, truthfully, people are accustomed to seeing a quarterback . . . having a little street in him. And I think that's kind of unsettling."

That's right! You don't mess with an Arkansas"thug" who goes by the name, "BigTex!" www.nflnetwork.com

Could it be that the Cleveland Cavs fans have actually and FINALLY quit their bitter ex-girlfriend like ways of crying over the loss of King James??

The general consensus among the bars and restaurants that surround the Q says that what's in the past is in the past now and that there doesn't seem to be enough angry fans to even fill a bar to boo LeBron!

Stop the presses!! Cavs fans are actually starting to get over it!?!? It's only been a year!!

This all started when ESPN writer Bill Simmons said in a column earlier this month that there should be watching parties to boo Lebron, saying, "Every round until Miami gets knocked out, [Cleveland fans] get to root passionately/spitefully/irrationally for The Playoff Team That's Playing LeBron. Why not open [the Q] forMiami playoff games and have 'Miami Hate' viewing parties?"

Economic development groups estimate that the downtown bars, restaurants and hotels raked in MILLIONS of dollars over the past five years, since fans filled the area for playoff games. With the Cavs missing the post season for the first time since 2005, businesses stand to lose some serious cash.

Because of the turmoil of lost revenue, restaurant and bar owners are now saying that they've switched their focus from the Cavs not being in the playoffs to their three other winning teams, being the Indians, the Monsters (a minor league hockey team), and the Gladiators (the arena football league.)

I'm sure the Indians are thrilled to bits to be in THAT threesome category. www.theplaindealer.com

And finally…

Guys, never hang up that tattered high school football jersey and let those dreams of chasing your football career EVER be thwarted, even if you are 59 years old!

Charles Chulada, is a 59-year-old former college football player and wrestler fromSyracusewho was cut JUST after trying out for the CFL's Saskatchewan Roughriders last week.

According to reports, Charlie showed up for the 86 man tryout, wearing blue jeans and an old t-shirt, while rockin' the pair of cleats he wore from his semi-pro playing days. "The self-described brick mason and poet rode his bike (no, I'm not talking a Harley, here. I'm talking a nice little Schwinn with the banana seat) from his house to the stadium to participate.

Unfortunately for Charlie, when it came time for contact drills, the team decided that it would probably be best to cut him.

Don't let the dream die, Charlie! (insert little bike bell "gling gling!" ring here) www.news-journalonline.com

And THAT'S my "Jock Itch!"

 J