The CEO fired my boyfriend -- now he's after me

(MoneyWatch) Dear Evil HR Lady,

I have been at my current place of employment for over twelve years. I am the only in-house graphic designer. A year and a half ago, I started dating a new employee in my company. His boss said horrible things to him about me and other women in the office. He tried to talk to his boss and then his boss's boss. He got nowhere. So he went to HR and then to the CEO of our company. Two days later he was fired. He filed a suit and it was just settled in July.

All of a sudden, my CEO is starting to bother me. He called me into his office with my boss and told me that he had many incidents of my making mistakes on projects. He said he had documented several of these mistakes (which I know nothing about). Recently, a document went out with a typo in the headline. It was signed off on by the department manager that requested the document, but I was told that it was all on me. I was also told that I made a mistake on a press release that went out. The problem with that is that I didn't do the press release. Other people within my organization do work that I am supposed to do, and all their mistakes get blamed on me. I have become the company scapegoat and am very concerned about this.

The president of our company has said inappropriate things to me in the past, as have other employees. When you go to HR you get in trouble. So clearly no one goes there anymore. I don't know what to do. I have two kids, and the flexibility and insurance that come with my job are crucial.

The first thing you need to do, without a doubt, is begin looking for a new job. Actively network. Research companies. Talk with people. Finding a new job is a top priority here. The job you have now is not the only job that has flexibility and insurance. No matter what else happens in this scenario, you're going to need a new job. The CEO is never going to stop being a jerk.

Now that's out of the way, let's look at what happened here.

1. You are a faithful long-term employee with (presumably) no black marks on your record.
2. New man is hired.
3. You begin dating new man.
4. Boyfriend's boss makes derogatory comments.
5. Boyfriend complains and is fired.
6. Boyfriend sues.
7. Case settles.
8. CEO starts singling you out for criticism

What do you think No. 9 will be? I'm no psychic, but I would not be shocked at all if what he's doing is gathering evidence so that he can legally fire you. Now, my long-term readers are practically shrieking at their screens, "He doesn't need evidence! He can legally fire you anyway! It's at-will employment!" Yes, it is, but in this case there's a little matter of the lawsuit with the boyfriend.

I don't know what the settlement really indicates. Companies often come to such agreements when there is no real case because it's cheaper to settle than it is to fight in court. But there generally has to be enough evidence to get a lawyer on board. And sometimes what happened is not illegal, but appears sketchy, so the company will settle rather than risk media exposure.

Still, the previous lawsuit is enough to have scared the CEO and he doesn't wish to have another one. Because you are (I assume) still dating the same man, he is right to be concerned about "associational retaliation." This is where person A, complains about something illegal (say, sexual harassment) and the company fires person B, who didn't make a protected complaint, but is related to person A. This is illegal as well. Now, whether or not the courts would consider you to be closely related as mere boyfriend and girlfriend, I don't know. But your CEO may not wish to take this risk. (Since the harassment directed at your boyfriend was about you, you may have a claim there, although in sexual harassment cases you must directly complain, which, I presume, you haven't.)

The point of all this blathering about laws and lawsuits is that your CEO is likely documenting a "performance problem." That way he can fire you, and when you say, "You fired me because my boyfriend sued you for sexual harassment!" he can bring out a whole stack of documents that show repeated errors on your part. Since firing you for making errors is legal, it makes it much more difficult for you to prove that wasn't the real reason.

So you need a new job. You may wish to consult an attorney. But, even if an attorney can put the fear of lawsuits into the heart of the CEO, you don't want to work there and the CEO would be more prone to settling with you rather than having you continue to stay. Which means you still need a new job.

I wish I could tell you magic words to say or the proper letter to write, but when the company is rotten from the top down, the best thing to do is to keep your head down and work hard while actively looking for a new job. Document the heck out of everything. Your communications should be via email with your home email address blind copied on everything. Document every conversation and keep that documentation at home.

Have a workplace dilemma? Send your questions to EvilHRLady@gmail.com.