The sobriety story of Minnesota Adult and Teen Challenge CEO Tom Truszinski: "I had no God and no peace"

On the surface, Tom Truszinski had things all figured out. A successful career, a marriage and a growing family. Some would even say to get there, he'd beat the odds. One parent died young and another was an addict. On the outside, he had it all together.

But inside, he was fighting a much different battle, one that would almost lead him to take his own life, and another that almost took his life from him not long after.

His journey to becoming CEO of Minnesota Adult and Teen Challenge involves a buildup of pain and addiction. He says he wouldn't have it any other way.

"I actually had the perfect childhood, literally the perfect childhood," Truszinski said. "I had a childhood that was filled with parents that had drug and alcohol abuse. I faced neglect and abandonment and hurt myself. I had 18 years of drug and alcohol addiction on my own. Because of what I learned, I saw hypocrisy, especially in the faith, which caused a lot of questions. I've been arrested more times than I care to admit and had my fair share of struggles. How did I have the perfect childhood? Very simply, this: I really love who I am today."

Truszinski says a pivotal moment of his childhood came as his dad lay dying. Tom was just 13 at the time.

"On the night that my dad died, he was holding my mom's hand and he said something exceedingly loving to her. He said, 'I've always loved you.' And out of all of the things at him that she could have said back to him: I love you, too, thanks for everything, we'll be okay, her first words were, 'And Tommy, too, and Tommy, too.' ... My mom deep inside knew that this little boy needs to hear daddy say I love you before he passes ... And in that moment, I would love to tell you that my dad looked at me and said, and Tommy, too. I'd love to tell you my dad looked at me. But what my dad did is he turned his head and he looked out the window. And about 10 minutes later, my dad died," Truszinski said.

He added, "At 13, all I felt was I'm unlovable, I'm unworthy, I am not enough. And I felt like my dad was far off, distant and unavailable. Therefore, I thought God was the same way, uninterested, unworthy. I was unworthy to him and could never gain his love. So why even bother?"

Truszinski says the moment was a catalyst, fueling an initial foray into substance abuse. It lasted decades despite his growth as a student and young professional. He grew to find success in finance where he built a personal and professional identity, yet his use and abuse remained constant.

"My drug and my dependency on drugs and alcohol kept increasing and just exploding. And my run-ins with difficulties in my marriage, difficulty with friends, difficulties with the law enforcement folks, continued to increase. And I got to a point where one of my last arrests brought me to a point of utter depression because I could lose everything. This persona that I had hid behind, this vice president card, these things, being able to live a life with a beautiful house, a beautiful wife, kids, things, all of a sudden could go away, and I could go back to what my childhood was like: poor," he said. "I sat at a cabin in western Wisconsin one night, ready to end my life because I was so sick and tired of the lie that I was living. I wanted to escape ... I was convinced that my wife and kids and the world would be better off without Tom Truszinski in it."

Truszinski decided against it, but said he considered the next best thing to be leaving his family.

On May 18, 1995, he left, driving through Eagan, Minnesota, on his motorcycle. Then, a car cut in front of him. He swerved to avoid it, lost control and accelerated into the back of a truck.

"My first instinct was, I've got to get up," Truszinski said. "Nobody can see me down, nobody can see down, I've got to get up. So, I rolled from my left side to my right side. I'm right here ... and my right foot is over there. And that night, I started going in and out of consciousness. There was no priest or pastor standing over me, banging me over the head with the Bible; nobody's saying, 'I told you so.' But I knew that if I die right now, I am not going to heaven"

He added, "I cried out in desperation, 'God help me. God help.' And he helped me. He was there."

Doctors were able to save Tom and surgically reattach his foot. But in a moment of divine connection, he says he was set free. He detoxed in the hospital and during his physical recovery.

In May, he celebrated 31 years of total sobriety. 

Bigger Than Belief

Tom Truszinski shares his entire story of sobriety, how he became the head of Minnesota Adult and Teen Challenge and the current issues facing those in addiction on a brand new episode of Bigger Than Belief, a weekly podcast exploring faith, belief and religion, all through the stories of believers. 

With an emphasis on understanding belief through personal experience, we aim to create a conversation about faith that is fair, honest, and easy to understand - regardless of what you do (or don't) believe. 

We'll also take a journalistic approach to concepts and questions that are difficult to understand, while helping to make sense of current events impacting believers in our communities.