"When The President Made 'The Factor' A Cabinet-Level Agency…"
Amid the Snowstorm (Get it? Get it?) that's accompanied the appointment of Fox News commentator Tony Snow as the new White House press secretary, Josh Levin at Slate offers this, utterly frightening (and hysterical) hypothetical:
Press Briefing by Bill O'ReillySome highlights:
James S. Brady Briefing Room
8:00 p.m. EDT
Q: What was the president's reaction to the al-Zarqawi tape?MR. O'REILLY: Since you're a premium member of BillOReilly.com, Ms. Bumiller, I'd be happy to answer that. We have the al-Qaida leadership on the run, and we're taking the fight to them in Iraq and in Afghanistan. We will continue to take these threats seriously, and we will win the war on terrorism. It's just a shame that Cindy Sheehan and Ludacris and the New York Times provided the funds to make this vile piece of propaganda.
Q: What does Cindy Sheehan have to do with anything? Ludacris?
MR. O'REILLY: When the president made The Factor a Cabinet-level agency, my producers and I got access to some classified stuff that would knock your socks off, if you follow me.
Q: According to USA Today, the president's approval ratings …
MR. O'REILLY: I have access to secret prisons, OK, secret prisons that are even more secret than those ones in Bulgaria that you think are secret. And these are the kind of places where you have to check the collected works of Karl Marx at the door, because the only ideologue you'll be hanging out with is Helen Thomas.
Q: When will you tell us what you did to Helen?
(CROSS TALK. TASERS.)