John Oliver’s “Last Week Tonight” is taking a month off, but first he has a clear message to Donald Trump: Please drop out of the race.
In Oliver’s final show before vacation on Sunday, the HBO host outlined how either losing or winning the presidential election are not tenable options for the GOP nominee, given his temperament.
Losing isn’t an option for Trump, Oliver argued, because “his entire brand is built around not doing that.” But winning the White House, on the other hand, would mean “living in government housing, conversing with fully-clothed women and traveling in a plane that doesn’t even have his name on it,” Oliver pointed out.
Luckily, Oliver has worked out a third option for Trump: quitting all together.
“Drop out and tell America this entire candidacy was a stunt,” Oliver offered. “You would not be a loser, you would be a legend.”
“Just think about how triumphant it would feel to say on national television, ‘I openly ran on a platform of impossibly ignorant proposals steeped in racial bigotry and nobody stopped me. In fact, you embraced me for it. What the f**k was that about?’”
Oliver even offered the embattled nominee a platform to make the announcement -- on his show, with a recreation of the RNC podium and stage -- and a speech he could use, taken verbatim from the Scholastic kid-lit novel “The Kid Who Ran for President.”