The Parent-Teacher Team

As the school year begins this week, it won't be long before parents are called in for the much anticipated parent-teacher conferences.

To make the meeting easier, Parenting magazine has some tips to ensure parents get the most out of the conference.

Denene Millner, an editor at Parenting magazine, visited The Early Show Monday to share some of those tips.

Millner says the parent-teacher conference is an important chance for both parties to collaborate and ensure the child is getting the most out of their education.

Unfortunately, Millner says, if the teacher's words aren't always glowing, many parents tend to become defensive and spend the whole time talking about how great their kids are rather than allowing the teacher to explain why the child may need some extra help.

And, the parent can make the mistake of not listening to the teachers.

Millner says parents have to listen to the teacher, because the educator will be able to tell them things about their child they never knew. The kids' behavior outside the home may be different from their time in the house.

Being defensive is also a problem for parents, according to Millner. Some parents would take it personal if a teacher has some not-so-flattering things to say about their child. Millner says parents should understand it's not about them. A child might have some issues that need to be addressed.

If a child is doing something that's not good for the classroom or the child, it's good for the parents to take that criticism from the teacher and turn it into a positive, Millner says. Being defensive, however, will discourage the teacher to tell parents what they need to know. So the next time it comes to helping a kid, the teacher may choose to help another child whose parents were more cooperative.

Millner says "go deep" — meaning the conference should never be generic. She says parents shouldn't leave a meeting with vague comments or they'll leave frustrated. Parents, she recommends, should ask for details and expect firm, concrete examples of the child's progress.

Also, Millner recommends parents turn off the cell phone and concentrate on the conversation with the teacher.

Forcing the issue is another tip. It differs from going deep in that this is asking them for examples of behavior. If the teacher says, "Johnny is inattentive or dependent," the parent should ask for examples such as "What do you mean? When exactly was it that he was inattentive?"

Asking these things will clarify these comments because the first thing that comes to parents mind is the worst case scenario, Millner says. It could be as simple as Johnny doesn't know how to tie his own shoes and we need to work with him on that.

To make sure parents are clear on what the child can and can't do, they need to make sure that they ask as many follow-up questions as possible and get as many examples as necessary. This also reveals the teacher's understanding of the child and gives specifics on the child's progress.

Millner says some good questions to ask are: