Elephant Costumes and Topless Snipers: The 10 Craziest GOP Presidential Ads
The campaign video (below) of Herman Cain's chief of staff, Mark Block, urging volunteers to work for Cain and then taking a drag on a cigarette isn't the weirdest YouTube video of Cain's. If you haven't seen his "yellow flowers" campaign ad, then you're in for a surreal, head-scratching treat.
That's just the tip of the iceberg. Mitt Romney, Michele Bachmann and others have posted just as weird stuff on YouTube -- would you like to see Newt Gingrich and a man in an elephant costume, for instance? How about Rick Perry promising to increase unemployment? -- most of which is ignored by the media and the public. If you want to know which GOP candidate has linked himself to this poster of a topless sniper-rifle girl (click to enlarge), then you're in the right place.
The Washington Post thinks there is something controversial about Block taking a brief puff. Compared to the rest of the Cain YouTube oeuvre, it's actually the most appealing of his ads because it's so genuine. Block isn't faking his sincerity, and you can tell it's real because if it had been stage-managed he would have been told to drop the smoke. There's also a "Marlboro Man" aspect to it that will play well with Cain's base; much of his YouTube material has carried a country and western theme:
Cain's much stranger "Yellow Flowers" ad is on the next page of this gallery. It's a 4 minute cowboy epic that features a liberal who spits on the boots of a good ol' country boy as he tries to woo his gal. Then a fistfight breaks out. You can't make this stuff up.
Begin gallery of crazy Republican presidential YouTube videos»
Related:
- Romney v. Cain on YouTube: Rank Amateur Takes on a Seasoned Pro
- Michele Bachmann's Army of Facebook Activists -- Now Bigger Than Palin's!
- The 10 Craziest Election Ads of the Year So Far
2. Cain: "Yellow Flowers"
This ad begins, "There was a time in America when a man was a man, a horse was a horse, and a man on a horse was just a man on a horse -- unless he carried Yellow Flowers." The flowers are then used to make a side point about "why does it always have to be about color?"
That's not the only odd racial angle Cain has injected into the campaign. Check out his ad on the next page that suggests that income taxes are the new "slavery" in America.
Next»
3. Cain: "the 21st Century version of slavery"
The ad begins, "Our tax code is the 21st Century version of slavery. The IRS has become the overseer of the American people," a statement that will come as a surprise to anyone who thought that sex trafficking was the 21st Century version of slavery.
What's odd about Cain on YouTube is the way he keeps injecting a racial angle into his campaigning even though nobody else does. Back in 2006, he made this racist radio ad for America's PAC in which he seems to be suggesting that black people vote Democratic because they don't want to work or serve their country.
Next»
4. Gingrich and the stuffed elephant
Gingrich posted this news clip on his own YouTube campaign channel. Where to start: The fact that a man in an elephant costume sits silently on the Fox News Channel sofa as Newt Gingrich chats about children's books? Or the fact that his wife, Callista, doesn't say anything either even though she is the author of the book that features the elephant? Or the fact that Gingrich won't sit next to his wife during the talk? You decide!
Next»
5. Romney's "Hey Mitt, we love you!" collector pins
Apparently, he had them commissioned when he was CEO of the Salt Lake Olympics in 2002. Unfortunately, there is no explanation for what this bout of egomania had to do with the Olympics.
Next»
6. Romney's "pulled" attack ad on perry
This ad was allegedly pulled because the Romney campaign didn't have permission from CNN to run segments of its copyrighted material making Perry look like an idiot, especially from his "before he was before," gaffe at a recent debate. But the ad is still available in pirated form all over the web. Mission accomplished, Mitt.
Next»
7. Perry promises to increase unemployment
"As president, I'll create over 2.5 million new jobs," Perry says in the first line of this new campaign ad. That sounds pretty good -- until you realize that the economy needs up to 3.1 million jobs per year, in the first year alone, just to keep unemployment where it is. If Perry created only 2.5 million jobs in a four-year term, it would dramatically increase the rate of joblessness (and threaten the U.S.'s nascent economic recovery).
Next»
8. Perry endorses topless sniper rifle company LaRue Tactical
Perry appears to be bolstering his credentials with the gun-nut lobby in this ad where he repeatedly endorses LaRue Tactical, maker of sniper rifles and other creepy "sports" products. Those who would rather society wasn't lurching toward a Hobbesian war of all against all might be amused at this LaRue poster (click to enlarge) which suggests that their guns are so awesomely accurate your clothes might fall off while you're at the range.
Next»
9. Michele Bachmann fills out "the necessary paperwork"
I remain hypnotized by Michele Bachmann's announcement that she will run for president, in which she never actually says she is running for president: "Today I filed the necessary paperwork to seek the office of the presidency of the United States." Although the spot is only a few months old, you can already see how the pitiless lens of YouTube has altered Bachmann's hairstyle, dress and use of accessories. (Not that you should judge female candidates on that stuff. But, you know, it's still interesting. I'm just saying.)
Next»
10. Romney: Perry is an agent of Mexico
Another highly effective Romney hit-job, in which he makes the case that Perry is doing what the president of Mexico wants him to do in terms of allowing illegal immigrants to receive tuition at Texas schools.