Best of Both Worlds for a Working Mom
By DR. JENNIFER ASHTON
NEW YORK (CBS) Being a practicing physician and mother of two definitely has its advantages and disadvantages. I had my children when I was in med school, since I figured that would actually be the LEAST stressful professional time in my life to be pregnant. I was right, and the actual physical part of being pregnant was fairly ordinary. When I became a resident, however, with my babies at the ages of 2 years and 7 months, I learned just how psychologically challenging being a working mom could be. Though I knew my babies were being very well cared for at home (by my strong family support system), I also knew I was the one missing out on some major early childhood milestones. For my son's first year at pre-school, I never saw the inside of his classroom. My husband and mother filled in for me at school events, since I was working roughly 80 hours a week as a resident physician. I missed many of my daughter's early childhood milestones since she was the second child, and I was an intern when she was just 7 months old. This was emotionally hard for me, but I got through it by telling myself that I was making sacrifices in the short-term that would hopefully pay off in the long-term (when I had more control over my schedule.) Today, I have a medical career that gives me a lot more control over my life. I no longer miss school or athletic events, and have devised a logistical situation in which my professional and personal lives are in sync with each other (at least for the time being!). My office is half-a-mile from my home and my children's school. Now that my children are 10-1/2 and 12 years old, they tell me they are proud of my career as a doctor. They enjoy asking me medical questions and coming with me to my office to do their homework while I see patients. Personally, I feel fulfilled both professionally and parentally, because I find myself intellectually stimulated in both arenas. After all, one of the primary roles of a physician is one of teacher, and certainly, being a parent involves being both a teacher and a student! Our children teach us so much! I feel as if I learn every day, as a doctor AND a mother. Mostly, however, I feel unconflicted; I love what I do, and I do what I love. But my children are my absolute priority, and I think they know that. I feel being a physician has made me a better mother, and being a mom has made me a better doctor. I feel incredibly fortunate.