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Asking for credit card debt forgiveness? Here's what to say (and not say)

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Knowing what to say (and what not to say) could help you avoid stalled negotiations while settling your debt. Getty Images/iStockphoto

There's no question that many Americans are facing serious financial hardships right now. Not only has inflation been ticking back up, but other issues, like the high-rate environment — which has made borrowing and existing credit card debt a lot more expensive — have further added to the budgetary issues that people are facing. As a result, credit card debt is climbing and so are serious payment delinquencies, both of which are signs of how cash-strapped many households truly are.

If you're facing difficulties with paying off your existing high-rate debt, pursuing credit card debt forgiveness could be a way to regain control of your finances. When you take this route, the goal is to negotiate with your creditors and have them forgive a portion of your balance in return for a lump-sum payment. That can have an impact on your credit, but it could also result in paying 30% to 50% less (or more) of your original balance to clear the debt.

The negotiation process for settling debt is a delicate dance, though. Just one wrong statement could weaken your position or expose you to legal complications, so knowing what to say — and what not to say — during these conversations could make all the difference.

Learn how a debt relief expert could help you settle your debt for less.

3 things to say when asking for credit card debt forgiveness

Here are three key things to say when attempting to settle your debt:

"I want to take responsibility for this debt and find a realistic solution." 

This type of statement immediately sets you apart from many other debtors by showing good faith and a genuine desire to resolve the situation rather than avoiding it. Creditors are more likely to work with someone who acknowledges their obligation and demonstrates a commitment to finding a resolution, so taking this approach can work in your favor during negotiations. It may help to follow this up by briefly explaining your current hardship or financial situation.

Compare your debt relief options and get help now.

"I have a specific amount I can pay as a lump sum settlement." 

You should also be concrete about your settlement offer during these conversations. Instead of making vague promises about future payments, specify exactly how much you can pay and when. For example, you can say something like "I can offer $3,000 as a lump sum settlement on this $7,000 debt, and I can make this payment within 48 hours of reaching an agreement." This clarity shows you're serious and have prepared for the negotiation.

"I need this agreement in writing before making any payment." 

Asking to get the agreement in writing isn't just about protecting yourself — it's about showing that you understand the process and are approaching it professionally. Request written confirmation of any settlement agreement, including the settled amount, payment terms and how the debt will be reported to credit bureaus. This demonstrates diligence and helps ensure both parties are clear on the terms.

3 things you should never say when asking for credit card debt forgiveness

And here are three things you should never say during this process:

"I'll pay whatever I have to." 

While it might seem like a good idea to appear cooperative during the negotiation conversations with your creditors, this phrase, and phrases similar to it, actually weakens your negotiating position. It signals to the creditor that you may be willing to pay more than necessary to settle the debt. Keep control of the conversation by setting the terms of what you can afford to pay instead.

"I don't think I owe this debt." 

Unless you truly believe the debt is erroneous or fraudulent, disputing the debt during settlement negotiations undermines your credibility and can stall negotiations or make the creditor less willing to work with you. If you believe there are legitimate errors and want to dispute the debt's validity, do so in writing before discussing any settlement options. Otherwise, acknowledging the debt and focusing on a resolution will typically lead to a better outcome.

"I can start paying you something each month." 

While monthly payments may seem more manageable to you than a lump-sum offer, the reality is that offering small monthly payments can actually hurt your settlement chances. Creditors often prefer a lump sum settlement to a long-term payment plan, especially if you've already fallen behind. Making small payments might also restart the statute of limitations on old debts or create other implications you hadn't considered.

The bottom line

Negotiating a debt settlement can be stressful, but choosing your words carefully can make a big difference. Expressing financial hardship, making a concrete settlement offer and getting everything in writing will put you in a stronger position. At the same time, it's important to avoid statements that weaken your negotiation stance or create unnecessary roadblocks. By approaching the conversation strategically, you improve your chances of reaching a settlement that helps you move forward financially.

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