The Odd Truth, Dec. 4, 2002

The Odd Truth is a collection of strange but factual news stories from around the world compiled by CBSNews.com's Brian Bernbaum. A new collection of stories is published each weekday. On weekends, you can read a week's worth of The Odd Truth.

'Jerry Springer: The Opera'

LONDON — A humorous opera based on the life of talk show host Jerry Springer will be staged at the Royal National Theatre next year, the first new opera to make its London debut at the prestigious venue, the theater's incoming director said Wednesday.

"Jerry Springer: The Opera," which features louts spitting expletives, a chorus line of dancing Ku Klux Klansmen and a man clad only in a diaper, debuted at this year's Edinburgh Festival Fringe. It opens in April at the National's Lyttelton auditorium.

"It's exactly the kind of work the National should be doing — bold, scabrous, funny and beautiful," said director Nicholas Hytner, who recently replaced Trevor Nunn.

Written by comedian Stewart Lee and composer Richard Thomas, the opera developed out of a series of public workshops at London's Battersea Arts Center in 2001.

Lee and Thomas admit to being fans of Springer's Chicago-based show that has explored topics such as "I married a horse" and "I refuse to wear clothes," and pits trash-talking guests against catcalling audiences.

"One night I was watching the show, and I realized there were eight people screaming at each other, a chorus baying for blood, and I thought — that's opera," Thomas told The Associated Press earlier this year.

Caged Mobsters Nabbed For Sperm Smuggling

WILLIAMSPORT, Pa. - One of five New York mobsters believed to have smuggled their sperm out of a Pennsylvania prison to impregnate their wives has been indicted, along with his wife, on a charge of criminal conspiracy.

Kevin Granato, a convicted hit man for the Colombo crime family, came under suspicion four years ago after he was seen in the visitation room at the Allenwood Federal Prison showing off a toddler he called his child, even though he had been in jail since 1988.

Last week, a federal grand jury indicted Granato, 42, and his wife, Regina Granato, on two counts of criminal conspiracy. Regina Granato, who lives in New York, is also charged with one count of providing a prohibited object — a cryogenic sperm kit — to an inmate.

Mob associate Antonio Parlavecchio and his wife, Maria, were indicted on similar charges in December 2000. He was serving a sentence at the same prison, about 60 miles north of Harrisburg.

Sperm being held in a doctor's office for Maria Parlavecchio, who did not get pregnant, was taken by the government as evidence. She was on probation for a year; her husband had six months tacked onto his racketeering sentence and is due for release in 2004.

A Thief's Work Is Never Done

SCRANTON, Pa. — A man charged with theft didn't have the money to pay for a rehabilitation program that would clear his criminal record, so he stole a courthouse computer to pawn off, police said.

Police said Ernesto Valdez, 32, arrived Monday at the Lackawanna County Courthouse to enroll in the Accelerated Rehabilitative Disposition program, which expunges the criminal record of first-time offenders.

Valdez did not have the $685 enrollment fee, so he stole a court stenographer's laptop computer to pawn, according to police.

The pawn shop refused to take the computer because the power cord was missing, so Valdez returned to the courthouse to retrieve it, police said. He was arrested after a stenographer spotted him in the office with a wire dangling from his pocket, police said.

Valdez appeared before Judge Trish Corbett twice Monday — first she accepted him into the rehabilitation program, and later she revoked his bail and ordered him to the county prison.

Valdez had been accepted into the program after being charged in connection with theft of stereos from several cars in Scranton in June.

$10,000 Found In Garbage

DUPONT, Wash. — A trash can containing as much as $10,000 in cash was unearthed by crews preparing a forested site for a transit park-and-ride lot, officials said.

The most recent mint date on the bills and coins in the plastic garbage can was 1985, Police Chief Michael Pohl said Monday.

"The coins are so badly eroded, they're green. Some of it you can't even make out any more," Pohl said.

"Obviously, there was a crime committed somewhere," Pohl said. "We're estimating 10 to 20 years ago. We're doing the best we can to try to get it back to its rightful owner."

Police have yet to count all the money but estimate the total at $6,000 to $10,000. Some of the bills have been sent to the Washington State Crime Laboratory to test for fingerprints and to try to trace the money.

If the owner cannot be found, the money goes to the regional transit authority.

"Probably the speculation is more interesting than the real story," said Lee Somerstein, a Sound Transit spokesman. "Maybe it was some old curmudgeon who buries his money because he doesn't trust banks."

Monks Ditch Cement Blocks For Fruitcakes

AVA, Mo. - When the monks of Assumption Abbey could no longer support themselves by producing cement blocks, they decided to make fruitcakes -- prompting jokes about similarities between the two products.

But 15 years later, the Missouri monastery and its 12 Trappist monks are selling more than 30,000 fruitcakes a year.

Their recipe calls for 70 percent fruit and nuts to 30 percent batter. A mixture of cherries, raisins and pineapple is marinated for three days in burgundy wine. Then the finished cakes are decorated with four pecan halves -- placed to form a cross -- and injected with an ounce of Puerto Rican rum.

Assumption Abbey is one of 17 Trappist monasteries in the United States supported through the production and sale of specialized foods.

Town Voted Out Of Existence

COUNTRYSIDE, Kan. — The mayor of this tiny Kansas City suburb finally got what he wanted — he got Countryside voted out of existence.

After a divisive campaign that pitted neighbor against neighbor in the six-square-block enclave, the city's residents decided overwhelmingly Tuesday to merge with neighboring Mission.

The election drew voter turnout of 71 percent, with consolidation prevailing by an unofficial margin of 127 to 69. Official results will be released Friday.

"It's a landslide," said Mayor Ken Davis, the merger's leading supporter. "In the long run, people are going to be happy with their lower taxes and ability to participate in the bigger community."

Voters last rejected a merger initiative in 1998 by a 2-to-1 margin.

Mission and Countryside must now schedule a joint meeting of their city councils, Davis said, and Mission must adopt a resolution stating an intent to merge.

Mission Mayor Laura McConwell had urged Countryside voters to choose consolidation, calling their city — bounded by Mission on all sides "the hole in the doughnut."

Ticket To Heaven: $15

VACAVILLE, Calif. - Religions teach that faith, good work or a combination of the two will get you into heaven.

But a California company is selling tickets.

For $15 -- plus $4.95 shipping and handling -- Ticket to Heaven Incorporated will send you a ticket with your name on it, along with a "certificate of authenticity" and a wallet-sized testimonial card.

No faith commitment is required. As far as the company is concerned, purchasers are pledging to be true to their own faith -- whatever it may be.

The company's Web site includes a disclaimer that absolves the company of any responsibility to actually get you to heaven. And it "makes no warranties or representations" as to whether there really is a heaven, what it's like or how long it lasts.