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'Sex, Sex And More Sex'

As the host of Oxygen TV's "Talk Sex" and "The Sunday Night Sex Show," Sue Johanson has received her fair share of questions, running the gamut from sexual disfunction to depression.

Now, the grandmotherly Canadian sex-pert has compiled her answers to her favorite questions from devoted viewers in her new book, "Sex, Sex and More Sex."

A registered nurse and grandmother, Johanson has won millions of fans across the United States and her native country for her engaging way of talking straight about everything from premature ejaculation and menopause to bondage and discipline.

Read an excerpt from her book on Abortion and Affairs. Note: Some of this information is not appropriate for young children.

Her book is arranged alphabetically by broad subjects, so, on The Early Show, co-anchor Harry Smith, focused on words starting with the letter F, beginning his interview with "Fun."

Johanson says, "If you can't have fun, if you can't laugh when you're having sex, then you shouldn't be doing it, because sex is pleasurable. It's enjoyable. We are the only ones who really enjoy sex. We are the only mammals who have orgasms. So, therefore, I regard that as a gift. And we also have sex to enhance a relationship."

So the key is to relax, have fun and laugh. She adds, "When you stop and think about it, it's probably one of the funniest things we do."

Another "F" word is "Flirting." Johanson notes, "When we were growing up, we were taught that nice girls don't flirt. Only sleaze bags flirt. Nice girls don't flirt. So when you're older, why can't you flirt when you're older?"

She points out even with all the rules on sexual propriety and sexual harassment, there is still room for flirting, "because you don't have to harass a person to just look at them and give them that wink, wink, that nudge, nudge. What I call the copulatory gaze: The hi, big guy."

Next is "Fantasies."

"They're wonderful," Johanson says, "You can't survive without fantasy. We fantasize our way through life. You get in the car; you're driving down and stuck in traffic; you flip into a fantasy. Some of them are wonderful and some of them are sexual, and they're even more wonderful. And they're safe and they're harmless."

She notes people feel guilty about having fantasies, which she says is unfortunate. "Particularly if they're having a sexual relationship and they fantasize about somebody else. And men do it all the time. And it's generally accepted that it's okay. Women, we do ourselves a real dirty when we feel so guilty - we must fantasize about our partner. We must fantasize about our husband. And that's as boring as dishwater."

A better choice would be Denzel Washington, she says. "Much better. He's good!"

As for the afterglow women and men perceive after they have sex, Johanson says it is normal for a male to fall asleep after sex.

She explains, "After males ejaculate they go through a refractory phase. They lose everything and they're dead; I mean, literally dead. And so females, when we've had good sex, great sex, we go through a refractory phase, but it's slower and we come down in relays. So after we've had sex, we're lying there thinking; we're wide-eyed, awake and bushy tailed; and we want to be hugged, and snuggled, and kissed. We want to be told: 'I love you; I need you; I want you; baby, you're the greatest; and I will never leave you.' Once we've heard those five things, then, ah, we enjoy the afterglow and we can go to sleep. But we want to be cuddled and hugged and rocked a little bit."

Johanson is also the author of "Sex Is Perfectly Natural, but Not Naturally Perfect" and "Talk Sex."

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