No Visible Panty Lines! UBS Drafts Staff to Help Refashion Its Image
Though calculated and precise as a Swiss timepiece, UBS bank's 43-page edict for employees on personal style nevertheless crosses the line of poor taste.
Sure, good grooming and tailored clothes can elevate a garden-variety schlump to stylish heights. But UBS is betting it can burnish its sullied reputation by telling staffers to avoid garlic and visible panty lines, among other things.
Yes, you read that right. It's all part of Zurich-based UBS' scheme to get the Swiss public to see the country's top bank in a new light. UBS accepted a government bailout after writing down more than 50 billion Swiss francs ($51.67 billion) of toxic assets. UBS has taken other measures, including yanking a Le Corbusier reference from an ad because the acclaimed architect is considered anti-Semitic by some.
"The goal is for clients to know immediately that they are at UBS when they are entering the bank," the company's policy stated. And thus rolled out page after page of mandates and tips (the latter deemed worthy of beauty magazines by the WSJ â€" I'd hasten to add a 1950s-era beauty rag). From recommending suit colors (dark grey, black or navy blue are colors that "symbolize competence, formalism and sobriety") to skirt length (mid-knee) and make-up suggestions ("light makeup consisting of foundation, mascara and discreet lipstick will enhance your personality") the code runs the gamut from sublime to ridiculous.
And in more than one instance, oversteps personal boundaries. Telling staff not to overdo it with the scent is wise -- lots of people are allergic to the strong chemicals in commercial fragrance. Suggesting they refrain from eating onions at lunch, not so much. Likewise, a hint to store your suit on a large hanger with rounded shoulders to preserve the shape of the garment is helpful. But telling a woman to unbutton her jacket when she sits? Why, so the fabric doesn't strain over her breasts and belly? Are you calling her fat? (That's extreme, but you get the point.)
There are other items are downright sexist. Male employees are cautioned against coloring their hair to look younger, since the "artificial color contrasts excessively with the actual age of your skin." But for women, it's "Make sure to touch up hair re-growth regularly if you color your hair." In other words, please do try to look as youthful as possible especially if the drapes don't match the carpet -- no one wants to picture that in a financial setting.
Is UBS aware that another company, notorious for its tawdry reputation and skeezy business dealings -- *cough, cough, American Apparel (AAP), cough* -- issued a controversial dress and grooming code that drew attention for all the wrong reasons?
UBS spokesman Jean-Raphael Fontannaz said the guidelines were originally set out for temps who may not have worked at a bank before, and that it's only a test for about 10 percent of their staff.
Bottom line for managers playing along at home: if you have to dispense that much advice to your existing staff, maybe it's time you re-evaluate your hiring process. A caveat though, that earring-and wrinkled-khaki-clad dude who's pretty brilliant might just land a spot at your competitor.
Image of UBS via Wikimedia Commons CC 2.0
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