When Funerals, Honeymoons, & Hobbies Go Wrong

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SNAKES AT A FUNERAL:  Hershey, PA, is more than just the home of a chocolate company (Nestle, I think) (He's joking. Don't write. -Ed.); it's also where a 6-foot boa constrictor interrupted a funeral. Boas aren't indigenous to Hershey, so the cops want to know if somebody set it free. I don't know who the dearly departed was, but somebody really must not have liked that guy/gal.

'TIL DEATH --OR 7 YEARS IN THE SLAMMER-- DO YOU PART: Newlyweds Charlie and Cheri Harper had it all. All, except enough money to finance their honeymoon in Vegas. So on the way, they robbed the Newfield National Bank, in Franklin Township, NJ, of $7,600.  They got caught in Oklahoma.  Now it's 7 years behind bars, and they have to repay the money; which probably is less than they would have lost if they had made it all the way to the strip.

THIS STORY JUST KEEPS DRAGON ON:  35-year-old Ron White, La Crosse, WI, is a roofing contractor. So far, so good. His hobby is collecting dragons. 1500 dragons.  Plastic dragons, stuffed dragons, hanging dragons, silver dragons. Oh yes, and gargoyles. But mostly, dragons.  So far, he figures he's spent $250-thousand ... a quarter of a million bucks... on his hobby. He says dragon-purchases keep him below the poverty line, but at least he'll have something to give his kids. (Does that mean he's not available? Sorry, ladies.)