Orioles 2010: Dancin' with the Fat Chick
Hope springs eternal! I love opening day in baseball. It truly has the feel of a holiday. In fact, coming off Easter weekend it feels like an extended 3-day weekend. Except that our team isn't playing. So, let's make it a 4-day weekend. The O's kick the season off tomorrow night in Tampa.
The brightspot is that the O's play one of the darlings of our division...2 full days AFTER the 'other' two darlings touch all the bases with each other on national TV. Talk about disrespect! Here we are - all gussied up for the season and our team doesn't get to start with the other kids. Basically, the Orioles are still standing at the wall waiting to find which captain picks'em for their team while all the other kids point and laugh.
Imagine how the Rays feel. MLB is making them dance with the O's. Imagine that phone call. The Rays answering machine greets the caller & instructs them to leave a message after the beep....
(beep) 'Hello, Rays? This is Bud. The big kids are hitting the town this weekend. National TV Sunday night. Good times. And, I want to make sure your season is a hit, too. So, I...uh, We, uh, all the teams in baseball really, would think it swell if, maybe, y'know. Well, you're really Blessed living on the Gulf & all. Great weather year round. Busch Gardens. Fishing. uh, It would be super if you could. Hmmm. Well. (in a low tone with a hand covering the phone) How about ifyoutooktheoriolesouttuesdaynightwewonttellanyonethankswellmakeituptoyousoon. Greeaaat. She'll be over Tuesday. Have a season. Enjoy.' (click).
Sort of reminds ya when Mom made sure to pressure you in to talkin' to that fat chick. Well, she wasn't fat. She was 'a nice girl. Great personality. Fun. Big-boned or healthy.' but not fat.
And, now that I look at her...The O's seem to have lost a few pounds in the off-season. The braces are off. Pigtails can come back in style. Maybe Tampa won't be too embarrassed to jump on the grenade, after all. But, I'm sure they'll keep the date quiet until they are sure they score. Enjoy MLB 2010 (whenever it finally starts in Baltimore.)
