Using Body Language to Boost Your Message

People, like animals, are territorial and instinctively perceive new spaces—like an unfamiliar presentation room—as hostile territory. If you are new to a particular room or venue, it's likely that you'll slow down as you enter it, which can make it seem as if you are nervous or unconfident. The good news is that there are a number of steps you can take to address this:

• get to the room before your audience arrives, so that you already "own" the space;
• gain entry to the room before the presentation so that you can familiarize yourself with it; when you next enter it, you will appear more relaxed and in charge;
• make a point of going into the room at an even speed, or even stopping at the door before entering.

If you're using PowerPoint or any other equipment in a new setting, check out your equipment well before the presentation to make sure everything works, which will eliminate one typical source of anxiety. Make sure you know the fundamental do's & don'ts of presenting with PowerPoint.

It is possible that others have noticed that you are nervous, but do not add that to your list of worries! One of the biggest giveaway indications of nerves is your posture, and the irony is that if you look nervous, rather than getting people's sympathy, you tend to make your audience inclined to feel hostile toward you. Self defense teachers know this: they teach their students to carry themselves in a self-confident and upright manner, as people who walk in a timid or frightened way are much more likely to be victims of attack.

To make sure that your posture doesn't betray your nerves:

• stand tall, with your feet slightly apart; hold your head up and think generally about taking up as much space as you can. Remember the saying, "think tall and you'll be tall"—this will automatically help you to adopt a confident posture.
• don't hold your arms in front of your body too much. People feeling nervous or unsure of themselves will often "protect" themselves: in other words, they adopt a posture that protects a vulnerable area. Men might stand with their hands clasped in front of their groin, and women tend to fold their arms across their chests. Nothing can make you look more nervous than standing in front of a presentation audience with a folder clasped to your front!

Also, if you can avoid it, don't have the podium or your PowerPoint equipment or other object between you and your audience—it can act as a barrier and create a psychological distance between you.

Do not worry too much about gestures: with a few obvious exceptions, most are fine, as long as they feel natural to you. For most of us, gestures are an extension of our personality and trying to suppress them will only make you feel uncomfortable and on edge.

That said, do bear the following in mind:

• never make a rude gesture. You wouldn't do this consciously, of course, but if something happens during your presentation that makes you angry or defensive, you may unconsciously make a gesture (or say something) you'll regret.
• try not to make the same gesture too many times, or it will turn into a mannerism that will distract your audience. They might find it tempting to count how many times you wag your forefinger, rather than listening to what you're saying.
• watch out for stress-related habits that could detract from your message, such as playing with your hair or jewelry, shuffling your feet, or licking your lips. If you know you are prone to certain "tics," you should be able to cut down on them, if not eliminate them completely.
• use a "prop," such as a pen or pointer, if you don't know what to do with your hands while you are speaking. Props increase the space taken up by your body—and hence your territory—and you are perceived as more confident and powerful.

Finally, no matter how nervous you are, try to avoid hand-to-face gestures such as touching your nose or rubbing your eye. These often mean you're not entirely comfortable with your subject matter, and can signify that you're not being completely honest about something. Even if your listeners don't know this consciously, they will pick up on your discomfort.

If you've had any speaker training, you've probably heard enough about eye contact! Still, it's a basic human reality that the more eye contact we have with someone, the closer we tend to feel to them—and they to us. When you're giving a presentation, keep your eye contact with people as normal as possible, and try not to overdo it. Don't focus on the person to your left on the front row who you think is on your side, but on every single person in the audience. That way, they will each begin to feel that they have forged some sort of personal bond with you, and are much more likely to be receptive to your message.

In normal conversation, another element that conveys information (often unconsciously) is how fast you talk. Speaking slowly can sometimes indicate that you're uncertain of what you're saying; speaking quickly may show that you're anxious or excited. These rules still apply to some degree when you're making a presentation, which may make you feel as if you're stuck between a rock and a hard place. As ever, though, going for the middle ground is best.

Make sure you speak slowly enough that your audience can hear what you're saying, but don't be so stilted that you sound hesitant. Conversely, avoid rapid-fire speech—it's a natural tendency to speak faster than usual if you're nervous. If you're normally a fast talker anyway, you can completely lose your audience!

Your tone is almost more important than anything else. Even a simple word like hello can have multiple different meanings—friendly, hostile, surprised, suspicious, offhand, and many others—depending on how you say it, so you need to be careful about what tone of voice you use. There are a number of things to think about here.

• Try to sound friendly, but not so casual that you lose your authority.
• At the same time, don't be too bossy—this is a presentation, not a lecture.
• It's better to be too loud than too soft: nothing is more trying for an audience that a mumbling presenter.
• Ask someone you trust to listen to you and check that you are not swallowing words (easy to do when you're nervous)—in other words, that the ends of your sentences don't die away and become inaudible. To a listener, this makes it seem as if the presentation is repeatedly grinding to a halt.
• Bear in mind that too many "ums," "ers," and hesitations make you sound unprofessional and can be irritating to listen to. Plenty of rehearsal should solve this issue.

As with physical gestures, most catch phrases—"as I say," "basically," "you know," "like," "whatever," for example—are fine unless they're used too frequently, when they become a distracting mannerism. Again, when you practice, ask someone to keep an ear out for things like this. You'll be so used to saying them, you won't notice you're doing it!

People's emotions toward us are influenced by our facial expressions. It's difficult to warm up to someone who has the "wrong" facial expression for the situation or whose expression never changes.

So let your facial expressions change naturally over the course of your presentation. If you feel like smiling and it's appropriate to your topic, then smile. You won't appear unprofessional—in fact, a smile will put both you and your audience at ease.

According to the experts, people form 90% of their opinion about someone within the first 90 seconds of meeting them, which means that your audience will be making judgments about you long before you start to speak

So what you wear is your first means of communicating something about yourself, and will help your audience to relate to you…or not. As a rough rule of thumb, people tend to like people who are like them—so it's best to dress in the same sort of way as those you'll be presenting to. If you're presenting informally to a group of colleagues, for example, you can wear normal office attire, while a more formal suit might be better for a meeting in the C-suite.

If in doubt, it's probably best to err on the side of restraint. That way, the worst you can do is to present a blank canvas that doesn't distract your audience from what you have to say.

It is virtually impossible to control every last aspect of our body language, principally because we are not always conscious of it. If you are talking about something you don't really believe in, or if you're not entirely comfortable with what you are saying, your body language will subtly "leak" this somewhere along the line. This lack of "congruence" between your words and your body language will be picked up on by your audience, and they are likely to feel suspicious and distrustful of you and your message. The only answer is to be authentic in what you say, and then your body language will reinforce that message naturally.

When you become conscious of all the ways you communicate non-verbally, it can suddenly become terribly easy to over-do them…your eye contact is a little too intense, your posture a little too confident, your gestures a little too controlled, and so on. This can make you come across as insincere and may turn your audience against you. To be effective, body language must be subtle and seem completely natural—and, ironically, the only way to achieve this is to practice over and over again (unless you are a gifted natural speaker). Why not watch yourself in a mirror as you rehearse your presentation, or ask a trusted friend or colleague to observe you and give you honest feedback? Eventually, if you practice enough, controlling your body language will become second nature to you.

Detz, Joan, Can You Say A Few Words? Revised edition. New York: St. Martin's Press, 2006.

Arch Lustberg Communications: www.lustberg.net

Culture at Work: www.culture-at-work.com/nvcnegotiation.html

NLP training and resources: www.altfeld.com/mastery/seminars/desc-sb1.html

Speaker training: www.joandetz.com