Toys 'R Tinseltown as Risk, Stretch Armstrong and More Go Big Screen
Risk, Stretch Armstrong, Major Matt Mason, Max Steel and a remake of Clue are just a few of the items going from toy aisle to movie theaters. Suddenly this summer's glut of superhero movies seem like The Godfather.
The Hasbro (HAS) led Transformer-ation of Hollywood clearly has come with batteries included.
- Tom Hanks will combine two of his passions, toy stories and astronauts, when he stars as Maj. Matt Mason. If the name doesn't immediately ring a bell, Mason was basically Hasbro's 1960's attempt to put GI Joe on the moon. Robert (Back To The Future) Zemeckis is set to direct. But the major is not the only attempt to combine Joe and outer space in the works...
- Max Steel will be one of the rare non-Hasbro properties to be made into a movie. Mattel's soldiers-in-space doll will be played by Taylor Lautner (Twilight). Steel's production has been delayed to give Lautner time to finish the movie about...
- Stretch Armstrong, Kenner's rubber figure with a gelatinous filling that let it be twisted into odd shapes. If that doesn't say Oscar winner, I don't know what does. (You will not be surprised to learn that Kenner is now a division of ... oh, don't make me say it.) Our next Hasbro property in production is ...
- Clue, which Gore (Pirates of the Caribbean) Verbinski is alleged to be directing. This is just the latest in an onslaught of movie versions of board games (Candy Land, Ouija, Monopoly, Battleship). This movie has two strikes against it: Not only is it based on a board game, it's a remake of a movie based on a boardgame. The original 1985 version with Lesley Ann Warren has a few die hard fans even to this day. In Clue's favor is that because it is a murder mystery game it actually has a plot. Which is a lot more than can be said for ...
- Risk. You remember Risk, right? It is one of the few games which could equal Monopoly for endless tedium. Roll a lot of dice, wait to get a ton of pieces and then roll more dice for a few hours to find the winner. In the history of mankind the only time Risk was actually fun was when Eddie Izzard explained how it caused Hitler's downfall. (Audio NSFW and you will probably make a lot of noise laughing.)
What hath Toy Story wrought?
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