Test: Do Nice Guys Finish Last?

My post about Jay Leno received some interesting pushback. Some people can't believe that Jay Leno is really and truly a nice guy. They figure that, in order to be successful, he must secretly be a jerk. After all, "nice guys finish last" -- right?

I'm curious how many of you believe that this is true. Please vote in the poll, then click on the link beneath the poll for my take on this issue.

Click here for my take on this issue »

Did you vote NO? Congratulations. Your head is screwed on straight. You can read the rest of this post, but it probably won't be big news for you, personally.

Did you vote YES? Then I feel terribly sorry for you, because unless you change that belief, you'll never be successful. Here's why.

If you truly believe that jerks are more successful than non-jerks, then there are only three ways that you can approach success:

• Strategy #1: Become a jerk. You may think it's going to make you successful, but in fact it's going to get in your way. Everybody around you is going to know you're a jerk and they'll do nothing to help you out. You'll have to fight for every scrap of advancement, and when you get to wherever you're going, there will be nobody there to share it with. And that's the ultimate failure.
• Strategy #2: Act like a jerk. If you try to be a jerk, but aren't really a jerk, every time that you start to get successful, you're going to self-sabotage, because you don't really want to be a jerk. (That's why you're only acting the part... get it?) Furthermore, the more you act like a jerk, the more people will treat you like a jerk, and you'll end up in the same boat as the jerk, but without all the money.
• Strategy #3: Give up trying to be successful. If you truly believe that you have to be a jerk to be successful, and you don't want to be a jerk and aren't willing to act like one, you'll constantly avoid becoming successful, simply to avoid it. The world is full of people who are afraid to be successful be because they see it as a conflict with their essential nature, which is to be a nice person.

The world is full of highly successful people who are kind, respectful of others, and grateful for their success. Jay Leno is one. Others that come to mind are Tom Hanks, Ellen DeGeneres, and George Soros.

More to the point, the most successful sales professionals that I've ever met were all EXTREMELY nice people. Fun to talk to, and probably fun to hang out with. (See "The 2008 Gods of Sales!" for some examples.)

So if you believe that "nice guys finish last", I strong advise you to change that belief immediately. Because if you don't, you'll be a failure. Best case, you'll be a rich jerk who had to work five times harder to get rich.

You choose.