Rielle Hunter to GQ: "I Could Not Emasculate" John Edwards

Rielle Hunter and her daughter Quinn (Mark Seliger/GQ)

RALEIGH, N.C. (CBS) Rielle Hunter is finally speaking out about her relationship with former senator John Edwards - and that sex tape.

In a nearly 10,000 word interview with GQ Hunter starts off by making it clear that she is not getting paid for the exclusive and that she could have "cashed out big. But that's not what I'm about."

PICTURES: Rielle Hunter GQ Photoshoot

Hunter told GQ that she hasn't spoken out about the affair with former Senator Edwards because she was waiting for him to come clean on his own and she felt that if she spoke out first it would have "emasculated him".

The now infamous sex tape was the one taboo topic because Hunter has filed an invasion of privacy civil suit against Andrew Young, the former Edwards aide who claims he was part of a massive cover-up of the Edwards-Hunter affair -- a cover-up that could lead to criminal charges.

"I think like I do with everything: the truth eventually reveals itself," Hunter told the magazine before changing the subject. "And we're all here to grow and evolve. And I think Andrew will grow and evolve, even if it's behind bars."

As for the "hush money" - the million-plus dollars she reportedly received from Edwards' campaign to keep quiet - Hunter told GQ it was not hush money, and that Young told her "it was all on the up-and-up."

"Andrew gave me money because he felt I shouldn't be using my own money to travel to see Johnny. Andrew always wanted to 'take care of everything.'" Hunter told the magazine. "And at that point, I trusted him. He was seductive in how he took care of things and insisted that you have things."

Hunter denied Edwards' role in the alleged payoffs and told GQ, "Johnny had no idea what he was up to, nor did he ask him to do it. The dynamic was: Andrew always taking care of things without telling Johnny or anyone else what he was doing, and claiming he was doing it 'On the senator's behalf.'"

Hunter told the magazine that she still loved Edwards very much but that she is "not engaged. I am not living in any houses that are owned by John Edwards. And he's not my landlord."

He does, however, pay child support.

Read the full interview at GQ

PICTURES: Rielle Hunter GQ Photoshoot

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