Network Like You're A Millionaire
Personal finance expert Jennifer Openshaw knows how millionaires think. And when a millionaire goes to a business-related party, he or she is not there for the canapes, free drinks or to sing karaoke with their friends.
Parties are opportunities to mix and mingle with people you don't often get to socialize with, and in the case of office parties, you can get to know your bosses — and their bosses.
Openshaw, author of "The Millionaire Zone," feels strongly that using a holiday party as just a free meal is a waste of time.
She spoke with an Early Show producer before her appearance and outlined her ideas:
Saturday Early Show: YOU SAY NOW IS A GOOD TIME TO NETWORK, WHY IS THAT?
Jennifer Openshaw: Companies are doing year-end planning so if you're looking for a job, now is the time. Also, more holiday parties than ever — a great time to network while people are 'in the spirit of giving.'
YOU ALSO SAY MILLIONAIRES NETWORK BETTER THAN OTHERS — CAN YOU EXPLAIN?
Research has found that millionaires turn networks into checkbooks — they leverage who and what they already know. They get information, introductions, advice, financial support, emotional support and practical support — Oprah and her best friend Gayle provide nightly emotional support!
Using our networks makes it's easier for someone to say "yes" if they have some pre-existing relationship. If they don't know you — say you want to get an interview at a company or get a pitch meeting for your business — you'll have a harder time being successful. All of this can help you move up corporate ladder or turn your passion into income.
YOU COINED THIS TERM "LIFENET" — IS IT MORE THAN JUST YOUR NETWORK?
Most of us think of networking as who can do something for me. But your LifeNet is more than that: people, places and resources right around you that can get you to where you want to go. See it as an extension of you: as you care for it, it will care for you. LifeNet can also serve as your safety net.
YOU SAY THERE ARE 3 KEYS TO NETWORKING SUCCESSFULLY:
#1 - FOCUS ON A TARGET
To make the most of an event, find out who will be there. It's usually easy to get a list — especially if it's a fundraiser — or just ask. The more you know, the better you can use your time. Just as with a meeting, be prepared. Prioritize who you'd like to meet. I like to get a little background and see how I can connect with them or begin to build a relationship.
And you should have a goal. Don't just stand around talking to people you already know. Go in there saying, "I'm going to meet three new people tonight."
#2 - MAKE A CONNECTION
Don't just talk, but take real personal interest in the other person. If you can really connect with something — maybe kids, frustrations at work, a dream to start a business — you'll move to a friendship level. This often means focusing even when the background music is loud and distracting! Also means being who you really are. Be authentic. Successful people know how to connect with others and make them a part of their LifeNet. They'll send them an article that's helpful, make an introduction — think of them behind the initial meeting.
#3 - BE A GIVER, NOT A TAKER
It's true you get more as you give. Actively listen to the other person, to their needs. This is easier said than done. See if you can help them address their needs; don't be afraid to ask "How can I be helpful?" or "Would it be helpful if I ..." Maybe they need an intro to a firm or a person — I call this "connecting the dots" — and if you do that, you become more "relevant" to that person, more a part of their LifeNet. And they'll be there for you, too. So don't focus on what you can get, that will come naturally if you give.
# 4 - EXPAND YOUR TOOLS
The online networking sites level the playing field. No longer are Jane and Joe America shut out because they aren't wealthy enough or have the "right pedigrees." And major execs are using these tools because it's critical today. Even someone who doesn't have that pedigree can be instrumental in helping you become successful. I get people all the time who invite me into their networks after seeing a column or seeing me on TV and I almost always say "yes." You will see more of these tools with greater focus on niche audiences, sort of like the millionaire zone focusing only on those who want to connect to build wealth.
There is no reason you can't get to who you don't know now thanks to the tools online. Everyone from executives to young employees are using them. They allow you to manage your contacts more effectively, and you can manage the information that you get from these people. They also allow you to tap into people and get help in the way you need. Typically we would go to someone we knew for help. But now people can be thousands of miles away and can play a role in getting your next interview.
YOU ALSO TALK ABOUT BEING OPEN TO THE POSSIBILITIES...
Well, I wouldn't be married if I had closed myself down. Often I travel and I like to be by myself. I was in Italy a year ago and sat down in a patisserie on my one day passing through Florence, Italy when a man sat down. I was not interested in him and after having dinner I thought, "Don't make the mistake you've made before." And now he is my husband! But I'm a huge believer in applying this to networking. I can't tell you how many people I've added to my LifeNet whether on an airplane, in a store — you name it. I see everyone I meet as additive to my life.
YOU SAY IT'S NOT WHO YOU KNOW, IT'S WHO YOU DON'T KNOW.
If you focus on who you know, that'll only take you so far; it's limited. The key to success is getting to who you don't know and if you tap into your LifeNet, I believe you can get to almost anyone or anything.
YOU TALK ABOUT REJECTION — A BIG PROBLEM WHEN NETWORKING. IF SOMEONE SAYS NO TO YOU, WHAT DO YOU DO NEXT?
The secret is not taking it personally. Also, even when rejected, there's always something positive you can get out of it. So go into a meeting or an encounter prioritizing your goals and if you're rejected, consider how else you can create a "win" — maybe they become an advisor or mentor to you? Maybe they make an introduction for you?