Finding 'Mary Poppins'

Making a decision about day care can be nerve-wracking because you never know what's going on when you're not there.

Experts tell The Early Show consumer correspondent Susan Koeppen you should really trust your gut when picking a nanny or a day care center.

You need to ask a lot of questions before you leave your child with anyone, such as: Do you know CPR? What's your emergency plan?

Also, if your kids don't seem happy (or if they display a change in behavior), it might be a sign that something that shouldn't be is going on when you're not home.

When Esther Lambert hired a nanny for her son, she thought she was getting Mary Poppins.

"I got the best references I could," she said to Koeppen. "I found her from her church. She was a mother. I thought I did everything I was supposed to."

But after noticing a change in her son's behavior, Esther became suspicious of her nanny, so she installed a nannycam.

"I don't know what I expected," she recalls, "(but it was) most certainly not what I saw. I was shocked."

What she caught on tape happened just minutes after Esther left the house: her nanny trying to give her 3-year-old his medicine, at one point pinning him on the ground. When that didn't work, the nanny pulled the boy's head back, then hit him twice.

"She scares him and tells him, 'You know what happens to you when you don't do what you're told,' " Esther continued.

"He ran around the back of the bed and he said, 'Mommy, Mommy, help me, where are you?' And as a parent, that, it kills you."

What happened to Esther and her family is rare. But it's every parent's nightmare. Whether you choose a nanny or day care facility, how do you make sure your children will be safe?

For answers, Koeppen turned to Kate Lawler, executive editor of Parents Magazine.She says parents should know the nanny industry isn't regulated by the government. You can use an agency that will pre-screen candidates for a fee, but they don't always check criminal histories.

"You should ask them, 'Have you done a background check on the nanny?' " Lawler advises. "And if they say yes, you should ask to see all the documentation."

You can do your own criminal background check online for about $100. All you need is the nanny's name and Social Security number.

And Lawler says ask the nanny questions, such as, "Why did you leave your last employer? What age groups have you cared for? And what's your discipline style?"

"She needs to give you references of her former employers and you should check them out really carefully," Lawler urges.

She says you should also ask a lot of questions if you are picking a day care center: "Is the day care facility licensed? What is the staff-to-child ratio? How long have employees worked there?" High turnover could signal a problem.

And, Lawler suggests, observe how the workers interact with the children: "Do the day care providers seem friendly? Do they get down eye-to-eye level with the kids and really talk to them? Do the kids seem like they are having fun?"

Some day care centers, such as a facility Koeppen visited in Highland, N.Y., are using new technology to put parents at ease, offering webcams so moms and dads can use the Internet to check up on their kids.

"How often are you getting on that computer to see what she's doing?" Koeppen asked parent Marci Schmitt.

"More often than I wanna tell my husband!" Schmitt replied, laughing.

Schmitt says leaving her daughter, Alyssa, at day care is a whole lot easier, now that she's only a mouse click away. All she needs is her user name and a password, and voila! She gets a bird's-eye view of Alyssa's day care.

"It's kinda nice that you are able to see exactly what is going on and what they are telling you about what's going on," Scmitt says.

Esther Lambert says without a camera, she never would have known what was going on with her childcare provider. In the end, she pressed charges, and the nanny went to jail.

"I want parents to know that, just when you think you have Mary Poppins, you may not have Mary Poppins, indeed."