Terry Foster: It's Important For Everyone To Understand The Consequences Of Suicide

By Terry Foster
@TerryFoster971

If you haven't seen it I encourage you to read Dave Birkett's piece in the Free Press about former Lions quarterback Erik Kramer's suicide attempt and subsequent recovery.

I am glad Kramer agreed to the interview because it is important for everyone to understand the consequences of suicide and how much it affects everyone. I know firsthand.

My cousin Juanita's first husband James dealt with issues of failure and placed a gun to his temple and killed himself when I was about 12 years old. His mother discovered him after hearing the gun shot. And it was a tough ride home from work for my cousin after she got the news.

James hated his circumstance in life. He was poorly educated, could not keep a job and it did bother him that my cousin was the bread winner. He wanted to contribute more which I totally understand. It is programmed in men to bring home the bacon. He did not.

My cousin dealt with the pain and guilt for years before she was able to move on. Her smile disappeared for a few years. She was crippled over in pain before eventually finding happiness again.

We all wondered what we could have done to prevent this. Even though we knew he was unhappy at times, James was an energetic man that probably drank too much and often was the life of the party.

We'd go fishing and in addition to fishing lures and bait James carried a half pint of whiskey in his back pocket. If he got some extra money he upgraded to cognac.
It was during these trips to the Detroit River that I saw what troubled him. He'd drink and talk about "how the white man did him wrong." He had a few choice words for the white man as he fished and talked loudly.

It was never his fault. It was always the white man.

After a while he'd talk to his fishing line screaming "Here fishy, fishy, fishy." And when he missed one he'd curse out loud.

I was too young to figure out something was wrong. But I knew a lot of men like Uncle James. They felt stuck in the ghetto and wanted out. They just could not figure out how.

Uncle James did figure out a way, but it left friends and family in a sad state that took months to recover from.

I am glad Kramer failed in his attempt and is recovered from the demons that troubled him.

(Foster can be reached at Terry.Foster@cbsradio.com)