When country singer and VH1 "Celebrity Rehab" star Mindy McCready recently went online, the last thing she expected to see was herself as the star of the alleged sex tape, "Mindy McCready, Baseball Mistress," she tells CBSNews.com.
A candid McCready, who says that she found out about the alleged sex tape the same way as the public did, says that she is really devastated over it.
"This is a terrible thing for me. I am not going to sit here and tell you that I am not ridiculously upset about the whole situation," she admitted. "It's very hard to work as hard as I have to make things better and to change and to move forward with my life, and then have another thing come and knock me back, but I consider all the stuff that I have been through like spiritual training."
The racy footage, which surfaced as McCready is trying to revive her singing career, reportedly has has narrations about her trysts with married Red Sox pitcher Roger Clemens and former beau, "Superman" actor Dean Cain.
There have been accusations that this is just another publicity stunt, but McCready's camp denies that she had anything to do with it. There is also a legal battle underway with Vivid Entertainment over the alleged sex tape's distribution rights.
But leaked sex tapes don't always mean the end of one's career in Hollywood. For reality TV stars Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton, like it or not, their careers got an added a boost.
Regardless of the outcome of her career, McCready says she's genuinely remorseful for what happened with Clemens and feels bad for him and his family.
"After my relationship ended with Roger years ago, we have not spoken much since then," she said. "My people do talk to his people, which is so ridiculous-sounding, but yeah there has been contact between my lawyers and his lawyers.
"The fact of the matter is I didn't want to talk about that situation. I wasn't proud of it and it would have been fine for me to just let it all lie, for no one to ever know and for it not to ever be brought up. But it did and there is nothing I can do about it. I am not going to dwell on things that happened in past that are negative. I am trying so hard to make good from all of this. I am sorry for what he and his family are going through right now...and I would encourage him to stay true to himself because that is what I am doing with the situation."
In McCready's defense, she says she could have dished about her wild life a long time ago, but she chose not to.
"You know I have had a lot of stuff happen in my life. I tell people - when I got to Nashville I was the ripe old age of 17 and I could have written an autobiography then that would have blown everyone's mind for the life lived of a 17-year-old woman," she said. "My life has always been chaotic, crazy and dramatic and just unbelievable. So nothing has changed from that scenario, it's always been that way it was not something that I brought upon myself or that I have made it's just how things are."
She will set the record straight however when her autobiography, "I'm Still Here" hits the shelves this summer (an official release date hasn't been set).
McCready is known for a tabloid life of domestic abuse, drug and DUI arrests and suicide attempts. She later had a high-profile role in the 2010 edition of VH1's "Celebrity Rehab." On the TV show, she performed her title song, "I'm Still Here" about surviving difficult times, which brought her "Rehab" colleagues to tears.
In addition to the release of her CD, "I'm Still Here" on April 20 and a new book of the same name this summer, McCready will launch her own reality TV show where her attempt to become a female country music mogul will be documented (a name or network has not been announced). She will also soon regain custody of her son, Zander Ryan McCready.
By Melissa Castellanos