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(AP Photo/Tampa Tribune)
The number one story on right now is "Gator Attacks Naked Man On Crack." Which is as it should be. Because how do you not click on that? The story has everything: Nudity, a scary animal, and crack. The only recent story that tops it is this one, "Car Driven By Naked Woman Kills Lawyer," in which a naked Taliyah Taylor, who reportedly had "taken ecstasy and smoked 'purple haze weed,'" is said to have been screaming "The demons are coming! The demons are trying to get (me)" before getting behind the wheel. Sorry, naked man on crack. Maybe next time.

But one thing we wanted to point out about the naked man on crack story – and he's gonna make it, by the way, unlike that poor lawyer – is the related stories listed on the left of the page. These are, as you probably guessed, the stories a web producer decided you might want to read if you are interested in a story about a naked man on crack who is attacked by a gator. When a producer is doing a story about, say, the pope, coming up with related stories is a fairly simple process – you just pick other pope stories, like "Pope Pushes Turkey To Protect Christians" or "Muslim Cleric Warns Pope Of 'Islamophobia'." But the happy truth is that there are simply not a ton of stories about naked men who have been attacked by large animals while on crack or crack-like substances. So a producer's gotta get creative.

Hence the related stories on the naked man/gator/crack story, which run the gamut from the only tangentially related "Whale Injures Trainer At SeaWorld" to "Trappers Say They Caught Killer Gator," which at least does include a gator. There is also Wrong Bear Killed After Mauling, the logic apparently being that if you like stories about the troubles men on crack can have with gators, you'll absolutely love tales of mistaken identity involving murderous black bears.

There is also an "interactive" to the left of the story, on "Substance Abuse in America." If you are one of those people who clicked on the naked man/gator/crack story not because you're into naked men or gators (or both!), but do kind of have a thing for crack, has helpfully included the feature so you can "Find out where to get help." And above that is a "photo essay" that allows you to "Take a gander at some of our favorite critters," in case you like cute animals and have your crack and/or naked man problems under control.

Here's hoping.

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