In particular, we love those polls -- very entertaining. At ten o'clock on Tuesday night, our TV newscasts followed their guidance and said Mrs. Clinton was finished. By breakfast she was almost President. Brilliant! Good old New Hampshire. You couldn't make it up.
We care partly, of course, because even though you are foreigners, you speak -- for the most part -- the same language as us … but also because decisions taken by your President do have quite an impact over here -- like going to war, relations with Iran, dealing with Russia, the Middle East Peace Process ... things like that.
We care also because we enjoy what our politicians call a 'special relationship' with America . We are therefore especially likely to do what you tell us -- I mean, to stand shoulder to shoulder with our friends across the pond. Anyway, you get my point, we care about who is going to be your next President, perhaps even more than some of you, and therefore I think we have a democratic right to express an opinion. In fact, on behalf of the voters of Britain, I demand that right.
We want our own caucus or primary -- we would accept either because we have no idea what the difference is. I always thought a caucus was part of the old Soviet Union. Anyway, we demand the right to watch Mrs. Clinton shed the occasional tear.
We want that Mr. Obama touring the streets of London telling us that 'something is happening'.
We want that one with the white hair who looks like someone's favourite uncle to come to give us a firm lecture.
We want to hear from the preacher, the Mormon …..bring them all on.
Most of all, we want to join in because for the first time I can remember in many years, this campaign of yours is fun. So come on, do the right thing by your old buddies, give us a vote. And someone tell us what a caucus is.
By Peter Allen