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Horrible Horoscopes: Virgo

By Mason Johnson

Warning: If you love astrology, are offended easily, or/and have no sense of humor, this might make you gassy (and angry). Not your sign? Find more Horrible Horoscopes here.

100 LB Woman Wins Thanksgiving Dinner Eating Contest
Wow. A Thanksgiving eating contest. How festive. (Credit: Joe Kohen/Getty Images)

Virgo

I get it, sometimes it's hard to put up with your family. Especially at the dinner table during Thanksgiving. One minute you're laughing and having a good time, then you're fighting with your brother over a turkey leg, then you're screaming, arguing...

Then you stab him in the neck with a fork.

And then everyone's appetite disappears.

The stars have some very solid advice, Virgo: Lose that temper, or you'll never get invited to another Thanksgiving again.

Horrible Horoscopes is updated Monday through Friday. Find the latest Horrible Horoscopes here!

Mason Johnson knows absolutely nothing about astrology.

EMERGENCY COMPONENT - LOCAL

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