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Column: Disney Princesses Inspire Write-in Presidential Candidate

This story was written by Leah Hitchens, The Post
Election Day is here! Hail the glossy cardstock with Colgate-smilingpoliticians on the front. But what if you freeze in the voting boothand forget who your guy is? Well, Ill tell you who to vote for. Me.Im running for president as a member of the Disney Princess Party andheres why you should write in my name for president of the UnitedStates of America.Vote for me because, much like Pocahontas, I am a forerunner forthe issues of sustainable energy and environmental care. Pocahontas setthe standard of making the most of Earths resources. She has beeninfluential in my value for painting with all the colors of the windand, after all, How high will the sycamore grow? If you cut it downthen youll never know. This is a clear call for transformation of ourenvironmental priorities. Sing with me: Come run the hidden pinetrails of the forest. Come taste the sun-sweet berries of the Earth.Come roll in all the riches all around you and for once, never wonderwhat they're worth.Vote for me because I believe in the right to pursue the AmericanDream. I believe in equipping and empowering individuals andsmall-business owners to navigate the economy and develop a betterAmerica. Who else embodied this as well as Cinderella? She was poor andstruggling in the position that life handed her. But she didnt staythere. By associating with the right people and making the rightchoices, she climbed economically until her days of slaving away werejust a vague memory overshadowed by a flowing gown and glitteringtiara. Vote for me because I have a solid example of whom to draw from inshaping my education policies. Belle. I believe that we should modelBelles upbringing and stress literacy in rural areas. When elected aspresident, I will ensure that every public library has a rolling ladderand that children of single-parent households can keep a book if theyread it twice. I will create a year-round rewards program for studentsbased on the hours they spend reading. This would encourage dancing andsinging around small towns with a book in hand at all times. Vote for me because, through the example of Snow White, Ive notonly learned about, but can also model the importance of, making alliesto fight and defeat real world threats. Much like the threat of evilfrom terrorist groups worldwide today, the evil witch could have easilywiped out Snow White had it not been for the seven dwarves and avarious array of woodland creatures. She had built a helpingrelationship with the animals so that with a mere twitter of her vocalcords, they were there as her reinforcements. I believe in Americabuilding the same kind of relationship with the global community, sothat if the peace of our country is threatened, a simple fa-la-la-lawould call nations to our aid. I could go on for days with numerous examples of how my veryeffective political ideas have been shaped by the Princess Party, but Ibelieve Ive given you enough to decide. Vote Leah Hitchens forpresident in 2008. Thank you.