Cruel And Unusual Punishment

From what I'm hearing from House Republicans, they no longer believe they have the votes to impeach the president, but the question is, if they don't impeach him, should he be punished? I think he should.

I never thought the stuff he did warranted impeachment, but let's face it, it was pretty scummy stuff, and a rebuke or censure would be letting him off too light.

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I'm thinking more along the lines of sending him on a locked car trip.

Instead of impeachment, the House of Representatives would load up a car with all the characters who put us through this mess and sentence the president to drive them across the United States.

Next to the president I'd put Linda Tripp in the front seat in that middle seat where she'd have access to the phone and the tape deck.

Lucianne Goldberg, that New York woman who was always egging her on would get the window seat.

Ken Starr could sit right behind the president, that would be a good place to give out driving tips to.

To keep the conversation going, how about Monica's old lawyer, Bill Ginsburg next to him. To make sure Congress was represented, how about Barney Frank in the seat next to Ginsburg.

If we could get a Suburban, Monica could sit in the way-back with any number of lawyers from either side.

Cruel and unusual punishment to be sure, but they'd all get to know each other just as we've come to know them. Who do you suppose would be the first to ask, 'Are we there yet?'

Written by Bob Schieffer
©1998, CBS Worldwide Inc., All Rights Reserved
  • CBSNews.com staff CBSNews.com staff

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