Wheel of Misfortune: Reality TV Is Now All About Pawn Shops and Foreclosed Flips
This fall the spawn of pawn-shop shows are coming to TV: A slew of "reality" series about flipping foreclosed homes. And that's undoubtedly just the beginning as Hollywood producers figure out how to cash in on people going broke.
America loves its pawn-shop shows, and they're proliferating as a result. (I'm a fan of Storage Wars -- the top show on A&E, which I think belongs in this genre -- but will also happily watch the History Channel's Pawn Stars in a pinch.) Spike TV is soon to unleash Flip Men, about a couple of guys trying to make money on foreclosures. A&E and the DIY Network also have foreclosure flippers in the works. (Maybe A&E should change its channel name to D&O -- as in Down & Out).
Further, Jeff Lewis, star of Bravo's Flipping Out (one of several flipping shows that predate the mortgage crash) will be trying to buy back a house he sold -- which is now for sale because of foreclosure. That episode is the topic of this tender moment in an interview between Lewis and Curbed.com's oh-so-empathetic Raina Cox:
Lewis: I sold it in 2006 and ironically about four years later the people who purchased it went into foreclosure, and I'm now trying to buy the house back for $1M less than what I sold it for.Wonder what she'd have said had the owners been struck by the plague.Cox: Fantastic!
Surprisingly, there are as yet no shows about the people who lost the homes or who are selling their goods. Wait, did I say, "Surprisingly?" I meant the exact opposite.
Can't blame the TV producers for this, really. Their job is to make popular TV shows; there's probably not much of an audience for Grapes of Wrath: The Sequel. We like our reality very unreal, which is why Friday Night Lights never got much of an audience. Despite being a scripted drama it was by far the most realistic show on network TV -- quite possibly ever.
So listen up, producers and pitchers! Here are a few more ideas for you along the same lines:
- The Price Wasn't Right: People who have been foreclosed on try to guess the price of other houses that are also in foreclosure. Winner gets the house -- and a brand new credit rating!
- Who Wants To Be A CEO? Executives see how high they can get their companies' stock prices using nothing but layoffs. Winner gets 10 shares of GroupOn. Loser gets 20 shares.
- Let's Not Make A Deal: Millions of people try to get a home-loan modification. Only one winner per game.
- Total Jeopardy!: Contestants give money to host Lloyd Blankfein and then try to find a particular penny on the bottom of New York Harbor while he bets against their chances of succeeding. Winner is the first person not to play.
- The $25 Billion Pyramid Scheme: Enough said.
- To Tell Something That Resembles The Truth: Contestants try not to laugh while defending the need for CEO bonuses.
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