Wesley Clark Knows All And Nothing

I was fascinated to hear that you have a brand new presidential candidate in America called General Wesley Clark.

Now, here in Britain, we do know something about Wesley Clark as a soldier because in 1999 he ran the military campaign in Kosovo. He was at that stage based in Brussels as NATO's Supreme Allied Commander -- now that's a title with a nice ring to it.

In Kosovo, he did have a spot of bother with a BRITISH General, who was ordered by General Clark to take on the Russian Army at Pristina airport -- and refused. "Sir, I am not starting World War Three for you," our General Jackson told your General Clark. So the British military are not too keen on General Clark - I gather some of them even nicknamed him Dr. Strangelove. But I can't imagine General Clark is worried. He said of the Serbian leader Slobodan Milosovic: "You know the kind of guy he was -- he was the kind of guy who didn't play sports because his mother wouldn't let him. He was a wuss." He probably said much the same about our General Jackson.

So, he is a soldier who knows how to lead. But what else do we in Europe know about General Clark? He is good looking, clever, and reportedly does a very good impression of George W. Bush, and er --that's it.

What does he have to say about DOMESTIC policies? As far as I have heard -- nothing. That's because he has never been required to have any policies on anything. So he begins with a clean slate. And I have a funny feeling that that is General Clark's greatest asset. He knows absolutely nothing about politics.

If there's one thing that we share on both sides of the Atlantic, it's a distrust of all politicians. So when it comes to filling the most important political post in the world, clearly the person we want should know nothing about the business. That's Hilary Clinton's real problem -- she knows far too much. So let's have an army man. It worked for Dwight D. Eisenhower. And I don't see why we should stop the process there. Because, let's face it, what we really need for the next MILITARY campaign in which our two countries are involved ... is someone to lead it who knows absolutely nothing about military matters at all. Someone who's never fired a shot in anger. How about General Bush ...or even General Blair?

By Peter Allen