The best man explains in the Twitter feed that he was asked to house sit for his friend the groom while the couple went on its honeymoon and - apparently as payback for the groom's previous pranks on him - rigged the bed with a pressure-sensitive pad to detect when the couple is doing the deed.
The pad is linked to a computer and tweets the start time, end time, force, "frenzy index," and a cheeky "judge's comment."
The newlywed couple, of course, is completely anonymous, and so is the man behind the tweets. In a Dec. 8 tweet laying out the scheme he wrote, "What you will NEVER know is who they are. Or who I am.I figure I'll tell my mate in due course that he's had an audience.So spread the word!"
There are a few linguistic hints that the prankster is British (or perhaps Australian). Beyond that, readers don't know much except that he clearly has a sense of humor: The Twitter account is called newlywedsonthejob and the "real name" associated with it is Anon Bestman.
There's no way to verify that the whole thing is real and not some kind of hoax. But it would be a bizarre and unfunny hoax. This one probably ought to be filed under "stranger than fiction."
The account has nearly 16,000 followers. TechCrunch reported on the story Saturday.