My favorite question to ask a mom is, "What's your typical day?"
I've asked that question of thousands of moms across the country, and here's what I hear: Their days start early, with a bang, filled with everyone else's needs ... kids, family, home, neighbors, co-workers, and they don't just don't quit.
One mom told me that she has two daughters and each goes to a different school. She has a friend who also has two girls in those same two schools. So each morning, she and her friend drive to a meeting place by a highway and switch kids. "Do you slow down, or do you just pass the kids through the window?" I asked.
Seems like right now is the best time to be a mom — and the toughest. The best, because there's more support of other moms, and thankfully, of many husbands. But it's the toughest time, too, because more choices for moms lead to more stress.
And as we saw in the tape piece, women torture themselves with comparisons and judgments. Are we being the best moms we can possibly be? Should I be working or at home — or both? What will that mean for my kids now; my future later?
The other week, a newly divorced mom of three said something to me that I can't get out of my mind. "It's the loneliest job in the world," she said. "Because when it comes down to it, the decisions you make are so important, and you are never really sure if you are right."
I hope today's piece sheds a little light and a little warmth on moms who are pushing themselves too hard and holding themselves to such a high bar. It's time to give your own harshest critic … a break.
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