3-D: They're reaching out (into your wallet)

The hottest contemporary trend in Hollywood is leaving our contributor Conor Knighton cold:

This morning, instead of doing a NEW commentary, I thought I'd just show you an old piece you've already seen.

Except now, I'm going to charge you four EXTRA DOLLARS to watch it, because it's in THHHHREEEEE DEEEEEE!

Sounds like a terrible April Fool's joke, right? And yet, that's the joke Hollywood keeps pulling on all of us.

The extra "D" in 3-D? It apparently stands for DOLLARS, and studios keep raking them in by capitalizing on the 3-D craze.

This week, "Titanic" comes back to theaters. This is a movie that's ALREADY made over $1.8 billion worldwide. And yet, executives are betting that folks will pay as much as $20 a ticket to see Jack and Rose again in IMAX 3-D.

In February, George Lucas did the exact same thing. "Star Wars Episode One: The Phantom Menace" was re-released in 3-D. (Unfortunately, the characters remained pretty one-dimensional.)

3-D releases have already been announced for "Top Gun," "The Little Mermaid," "Jurassic Park."

Can 3-D "Citizen Kane" be far behind? "Sophie's Choice: 3-D"?

These older movies were never MEANT to be shown in 3-D - they've been converted in post-production. As a result, the effects mostly just look UNNECESSARY. The images look murky.

The motive, however, is perfectly clear - adding 3-D to a movie is a commercial decision, not a creative one.

So you know what? You can keep your glasses. I'll think I'll keep my money.


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