A study, by professors from Utrecht University in the Netherlands and the University of California, Los Angeles, just published in the The Journal of Family Psychology, assessed the workload and marital satisfaction in 169 newlywed couples every six months for the first four years of their marriages. Here's what the researchers found:
- Working harder generally leads to greater marital satisfaction. The researchers explain this by citing the "expansion theory," which states that engagement in work can create energy, thus invigorating the relationship.
- Among couples with children, when men work harder, it takes a toll on the marriage. The researchers say this is likely because more time at the office meant less time meeting family obligations and less time spent together as a couple (and family).
- Mothers with long working hours have happy marriages. This is perhaps the most surprising finding, and the researchers say it may be due to the fact that when wives work hard, fathers increase the time they spend taking care of the kids, which may make the division of childcare responsibilities more equitable, improving a wife's affection for her husband. It also could ease the pressure on women who are juggling work and family. Studies in the past have shown that when men help with the housework, they have more sex with their wives.
- When a spouse likes their job, they also tend to be happier in their marriage. In the study, when either spouse was highly satisfied with their work, that partner generally reported higher marital satisfaction as well, regardless of how demanding their jobs were. Past studies have shown that workers highly engaged in their jobs scored high on psychological well-being. However, when a husband reported liking his work, in general, their wife was less satisfied with the marriage, while when a wife liked her job, the husband was a bit more satisfied with the marriage. Why the gender gap? The researchers speculate that "for wives an increase in his satisfaction with work may be perceived as threatening his motivation to devote time and energy to the relationship." However, when the wife was happy with her job, the husbands were happier probably because their wives happiness spilled over into the marriage.