Last Updated Dec 7, 2009 5:45 PM EST
'Tis the season for pointless protests!
Who could forget "Buy Nothing Day" on November 27, when everyone took temporary stands against holiday consumerism?
Not to be outdone, PETA of course, had something timely to say about animals, conveniently wrapped in an ad that placed a nude Playboy bunny behind a Christian cross. That kept the Catholic League warm this season, since it got some press (and preferably donations too) by speaking up against the way PETA "exploits Christian symbols."
But even those aren't the most asinine controversies this year.
In the United Kingdom, there's a group trying to boycott pink toys because they might send "sexist" messages to little girls.
Stateside, the biggest boycott attempt was staged by the American Family Association against Gap because the retailer supposedly doesn't like to use the phrase "Merry Christmas" in its advertising and in its stores. According to its ads, Gap doesn't care if you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or the solstice. It will take your money this winter even if you are just looking to find a cozy sweater. But we can all rest easy now, because the AFA called off its boycott once a new ad ran that satisfactorily exploited the birth of Jesus Christ for commercial purposes.
Yes, there will always be gimmicky campaigns tied to the holidays. But none of this season's protests and boycotts have had any impact whatsoever.
Perhaps people are too worried about paying for their gifts to take up arms in the "War on Christmas" this year. Yet, even if our economic problems have put these faux culture wars on hold, the controversies can still provide us with some cheap holiday cheer. For the sake of a nation crumbling under debt, Sarah Palin needs to get on Facebook and light up the night with a paranoid rant about the Obamas' Christmas traditions right away!