Updated Aug. 12

While watching the games over the past few days, it struck me that something was missing. It wasn't that they lacked for excitement -- especially Sunday's slate, which featured, like, five walk-offs in a 75-minute late-afternoon stretch -- so much as they lacked for ... for heart. For feeling. For love.

Marital woes, Yankees sinking like a stone ... A-Rod's story needs to be told. (AP)

I ask -- nay, I demand -- that baseball tell us these stories.

I want to hear about how Asdrubal Cabrera's grandmother raised him and his 12 siblings in a corrugated tin shack without heat, running water or an Xbox.

I want to find out about Mark Mulder's involvement with his church choir and hear clips of the We Shall Overcome/We Are Family medley he arranged.

I want to learn how Ryan Doumit was set straight in the wake of that incident with the three coeds, the flask of Goldschläger and the irate llama.

And I want these touching tales of personal hardship and devotion to be set to an orchestral soundtrack that, in its subtle swell, euphonizes the triumph of the human athletic spirit over adversity.

In short, I want the televised presentation of baseball to be more like that of the Olympics. After he checks the Nielsen overnights for pixie gymnastics, Bud Selig probably will as well. Producers, dust off your soft-focus lenses.

Switching gears, then -- your Power Rankings, presented without prejudice or malice:

Power Rankings
Current		Team	Previous
	1	Angels · Trends	1
	No single compliment does them justice. Best at everything. Worst at nothing. Sons of emperors. Daughters of destiny. They have neatly trimmed fingernails and a well-stocked wine cellar. Oh, to be an acorn on their lawn. ... Oh, and Vlad Guerrero has healed and is whacking the decency out of the ball. It's all too much.
	2	Cubs · Trends	2
	Kosuke Fukudome brings OBP wisdom and quiet dignityishness and God knows what other kinds of silliness to the table, but at some point the Cubs have to think about platooning him and giving extra at-bats to Mike Fontenot (.944 OPS vs. righty pitching). Mark DeRosa's ability to play a passable right field makes this a no-brainer move. ... Adjectives I never expected to use in describing Ryan Dempster: "reliable," "ace-ish," "fit." ... I might have been wrong about Jeff Samardzija a few weeks back when I suggested that hitters would soon learn to sit on his fastball. His secondary offerings are much more refined than I thought they were. No hard feelings, guy.
	3	Rays · Trends	3
	The AL East became a race again Monday. Evan Longoria's broken wrist robs a just-decent lineup of its best bat. Meanwhile, hand injuries are notoriously slow to heal, so I suspect we've seen the last of Carl Crawford this season. ... On the flip side, Rocco Baldelli returned to the lineup. Some choose to dote on his injury history, but in his case I find it more interesting to concentrate on his resolve. I mean, at the start of this season, his body basically shut down on him. And here he is in August, swatting at major-league pitching. ... As far as freebie pennant-push acquisitions go, Chad Bradford and his ground-ballin' moxie ain't half-bad. ... Fifty-seven days in first place during 2008, 19 days in first place (all in April -- duh) in the 10 seasons before it.
	4	Brewers · Trends	5
	My peers are running with the "boy, that Parra/Fielder slapfest sure woke the Brewers up!" line of thought. Me, I think the schedule –- Reds and Nationals as far as the eye can see -– might've had a little something to do with the 6-0 surge. ... Vaguest description of Ryan Braun's ouchie that I've read: "Somewhat mysterious discomfort in both sides of his ribcage in his lower back." ... Today's incomprehensible Ned Yost batting-order machination, brought to you by Thorazine: batting Gabe Kapler (.754 OPS against righties) third and Corey Hart (.846) fifth against Garrett Mock. Who wants to be the one to inform him that the players at the top of the order get to bat more often than the players behind them?
	5	Red Sox · Trends	4
	Remember that old maxim about never having enough starting pitching? ... I keep harping on Clay Buchholz, but he was two different pitchers Sunday: a cagey one before allowing Jermaine Dye's home run, and a skittish, strike-zone-averse one thereafter. ... The Sox seem to be counting on Bartolo Colon to get healthy soon and bolster their rotation. Let me know how that works out for you. ... Kevin "Mooook-ie!" Youkilis has both hand and shoulder issues but, true to his rampaging-gamer form, will play through them. ... Six games against the Rangers and Jays at home, where the Sawx are 40-16, should prove healing.
	6	White Sox · Trends	9
	See the starting-pitching comment just above. ... I was against the Jon Garland/Orlando Cabrera trade when it was consummated, and I'm in told-you-so mode now that Jose Contreras is cooked for 2008 with a ruptured Achilles. ... This isn't to take anything away from Gavin Floyd's unexpectedly proficient work this season, but his walk- and HR-happy tendencies have to make ChiSox fans a little nervous. ... Their bats should be enough to keep them afloat through the upcoming K.C./Oakland/Seattle stretch. ... Possible Ozzie feud of the week: incensing the locals by insisting that Caracas, rather than Kansas City, is the true birthplace of barbecue.
	7	Twins · Trends	7
	That 3-3 road trip to K.C. and Seattle was nobody's idea of inspiring, especially with the bullpen flushing three leads. ... They better enjoy the home cooking and easily accessible laundry while they can, as the Republicans are exiling them from the Metrodome between Aug. 21 and Sept. 4. For a team that's 26-31 away from the 'Dome, that's a rough path to travel. ... We all love Joe Nathan, but he tends to stink things up when he enters the game mid-inning. ... With a stretching, hyperextending, over-the-wall grab the other night, Denard and his span saved a game. See, that's funny because the guy's name is Denard Span. Funny!
	8	Cardinals · Trends	8
	Raise your hand if you believe Chris Carpenter when he claims that his latest injury -– a "right triceps strain" -– isn't anything to worry about (me: not raising hand). ... Seeing Jim Edmonds swat the ball out of the park and make a few of his patented over-dramatized outfield grabs had to hurt Cards fans just a bit. ... Tony La Russa might be a bit too arrogant and way too enthusiastic about cat-spaying for my taste, but he oughta be a unanimous choice as Manager of the Year for keeping this gimpy gang afloat.
	9	Phillies · Trends	10
	Great offensive teams don't go through 23-inning scoreless streaks against the likes of the Marlins and Pirates. ... Uninformed speculation here: Is Chase Utley nursing some kind of double-secret injury? ... Charlie Manuel might look and sound like an individual pursuing a career in ice-cream service, but you have to like how he gets up in his players' faces when they dog it. ... Speaking of Manuel, he can complain all he wants about how Brad Lidge might've been damaged by warming up 17 times before entering the All-Star Game, but he sure didn't help matters by using Lidge five times in six days last month.
	10	Yankees · Trends	6
	So this is how it ends: With a whimper and what can only be described as a missed-opportunity-a-thon weekend in Anaheim, rather than a vintage Steinbrennerian orifice-shredding tirade. ... You can't knock the Yankees for their handling of Joba Chamberlain, who was coddled like a kitten. ... Over the past 10 days, the team has wasted excellent starts by Sidney "Tube Steak" Ponson and Dan "Rhymes With 'Rice,' Not 'Fleece' -– I Take the Time to Learn How to Pronounce Your Name; I'd Expect You to Extend Me That Same Courtesy" Giese. Fringe contenders can't afford to do that. ... I will throw my unconditional support behind whichever presidential candidate supports a Constitutional amendment that prohibits Derek Jeter from bunting.
	11	Mets · Trends	12
	The Mets have three starters who can't be expected to pitch past the sixth inning and a bullpen that incinerates leads with alarming regularity. This isn't a conventional formula for success, to put it mildly. ... They have a powder-puff week coming up, with three against the Nats and four more against the Pirates. ... David Wright hit like a madman down the stretch last year and he's heating up again now. ... This season, Ollie Perez has pitched well against good teams and poorly against bad ones. Good luck to whatever cash-flush team gives him the five-year, $65 million contract he'll demand after the season.
	12	Marlins · Trends	11
	They have the chance to become the first team in MLB history with four 25-dinger infielders. Colorful, quotable stats like this mask that the team (especially Dan Uggla and Hanley Ramirez) hasn't hit much since the break and remains on pace to strike out approximately 32,646 times. ... They enter Week 2 of their brutal mid-August stretch having mostly treaded water against the Phillies and Mets. Up next: three more against the Cardinals and three against the Cubs.
	13	Diamondbacks · Trends	15
	Adam Dunn! Finally, a team that wants to win and seems to have some idea how to go about doing so. ... Orlando Hudson's season-ending wrist injury is a killer, because he's one of the rare energy/enthusiasm/intangibles guys whose value can be quantified, both offensively (.817 OPS) and defensively. Maybe the D-Backs will give the A's a call about Mark Ellis. ... They're 27-42 when somebody not surnamed Haren or Webb starts. ... In fewer plate appearances, Mark Reynolds has struck out nearly as many times (147) as Ryan Howard (149) and 27 more times than Dunn (120). ... Six on the road this week against the Astros and Rockies should mean a hardy aerobic workout for the relief staff.
	14	Rangers · Trends	13
	This week's series against Boston and Tampa will tell us all we need to know about their chances going forward. ... Even though he hadn't yet been given a final diagnosis by team doctors, C.J. Wilson announced the elbow-related demise of his 2008 campaign on his MySpace page. I tell you, these kids today, with the loud music and the hair and the Internets and the tattoos. ... One of the "Sunday notes" columns I read said the Rangers plan to open the vaults in the hope of luring either CC Sabathia or Ben Sheets this offseason. And I'm thinkin': most MLB teams are practically choking on gobs of currency. Unless the Rangers outbid the competition by millions, why would any pitcher worth anything subject himself to pitching in that mini-stadium? ... Kevin Millwood could return this weekend.
	15	Dodgers · Trends	14
	Every time I see Juan Pierre in the lineup in place of Andre Ethier, I miss Joe Torre just a little bit less. ... Two consecutive ninth-inning implosions against the Giants? Ouch, babe. ... If you see a Dodgers exec before game time tonight, do him/her a solid and suggest a fake injury the team can use in order to banish Andruw Jones to the minors for some much-needed swing counsel. Rickets? Elbow boo-boo? Uvula-litis? Be creative.
	16	Blue Jays · Trends	16
	130 pitches for Roy Halladay on Saturday. Why? Why? ... Cito Gaston was an underrated skipper during his first Jays tenure, but I fail to see what he has done so far to earn next year's gig. Etching Adam Lind's name onto the lineup card, which explains the jump in run-production, was more a common-sense move than a managerial-moxie one.
	17	Astros · Trends	18
	They kinda snuck up on .500, didn't they? The Carlos Lee injury ensures they won't climb too far up the mountain, though. ... Barry Bonds as a short-term rental makes more sense than the Astros' other recent personnel brainstorms, so bank on it not happening. Because who needs a .475 on-base percentage when you have Darin Erstad (.692 OPS in '08) and his daring feats of defense? ... Lance Berkman's home run Sunday was his first since June 30, and I hadn't noticed. Shame on me.
	18	Tigers · Trends	17
	Welcome to the 2008 season, Miguel Cabrera. You can put your street clothes in the locker to your left. Please arrive promptly at 8 a.m. tomorrow for your physical and weigh-in. ... Uh-oh. Gary Sheffield has realized that he has subtly been demoted into a semi-platoon. Mobilize the National Guard and place no fewer than two security guards around Jim Leyland at all times, even in the shower.
	19	Orioles · Trends	19
	Finishing only three or four games under .500 with this ragtag collection of talent would be quite the achievement, akin to making a coherent movie from an Ethan Hawke script.
	20	Royals · Trends	21
	Tony Pena Jr. had a walk-off hit on Sunday! This is notable because Pena is such a patsy at the plate that teammates have taken to hiding his bats and helmet. ... In the wake of above-the-waist messages delivered to Nick Swisher and Delmon Young, Zack Greinke's getting quite the reputation as a li'l headhunter.
	21	Braves · Trends	23
	Congratulations to Mike Hampton on his first win since leaving Shea for Colorado's fresh mountain air and fine public schools. ... Tom Glavine returns Thursday to face the Cubs. ... Uh, Chipper and McCann are healthy again. ... I got nuthin' here. Sorry.
	22	Indians · Trends	25
	Paul Byrd in his past four starts: 4-0 with a 1.24 ERA, no home runs allowed, and a .570 OPS against. Plus he's waiver-trade simpatico. ... Here's a deal that helps both teams: Indians GM Mark Shapiro gets loaned out to San Diego to help the Padres locate able position players, while Padres GM Kevin Towers spends a few weeks this winter helping the Indians assemble a coherent bullpen. Win-win, right?
	23	Rockies · Trends	20
	They lost three of four at home to the Nationals and allowed 16 runs in a single game to the Padres. In doing so, they killed dead any thoughts of a 2007-ish resurgence and heaped great shame upon their families. Let's move on.
	24	Athletics · Trends	22
	Well, they won a game this week. I suppose that counts for something. ... Brad Ziegler still hasn't allowed a run. ... Any sports editor who greenlights a "Huston, we have a problem" headline for a story about Mr. Street's recent struggles will be punished with three months on the WNBA beat. Don't say you haven't been warned. ... Carlos Gonzalez is hitting a little, at least.
	25	Pirates · Trends	24
	Jeff Karstens couldn't get AL hitters out. His startling early success in the NL is yet another indictment of the junior circuit's inferior talent. ... Far be it for me to tell anybody how to run his business, but the Pirates might want to devote the lion's share of their organizational energy to signing top draft pick Pedro Alvarez before Friday's deadline. ... In case you're counting at home -– and I know some of you are -– that's four doubles for Sexy Steve Pearce in 41 plate appearances this season.
	26	Giants · Trends	27
	I don't know why, because I'm a fan of neither the Giants nor jurisprudence, but I was kinda thrilled to see Barry Bonds back in a ballpark on Saturday. ... Back-to-back walk-off wins against the Dodgers suggest they still give a hoot, which is more than can be said for most of the teams that appear in the bottom third of this little exercise.
	27	Reds · Trends	26
	Please, please, please limit Edinson Volquez's workload the rest of the way so we can enjoy his heavenly changeup of mirth and wonder in 2009 and beyond. And I ask this as somebody with a significant short-term stake in his 2008 fantasy-baseball performance. ... Quote from Homer Bailey upon being sent back down to the minors: "It's not the big leagues, but honestly I'm looking forward to it." ... Getting three scuffed prospects for Adam Dunn is better than taking the compensatory draft picks after he leaves as a free agent and paying them a ton, I guess. At least it signifies the team is serious about rebuilding around one of baseball's better young cores (Bruce, Volquez, Phillips, Votto, et al).
	28	Padres · Trends	28
	Alarming line from Sunday's San Diego Union-Tribune: "... a Padres executive painted a stark fiscal picture for 2009, saying club owner John Moores might shrink the payroll to $40 million." That's not a lot, especially when Jake Peavy and Khalil Greene eat up $14.5 million of that sum. Save your cards and letters; I know that Peavy's worth it. ... First Greg Maddux vetoes a deal, and now Brian Giles. Everything they say about the quality of life in San Diego must be true, and then some.
	29	Mariners · Trends	29
	Carlos Silva called out the team's hitters the other day, so at least the Mariners are getting some yippy leadership for the $48 million they invested in him. ... They've finally cut Jose Vidro and placed Kenji Johjima in the witness protection program, which frees regular at-bats (at least in theory) for Jeff Clement and Wladimir Balentien. They'll still suck, but at least they'll suck with hope and youthful vigor.
	30	Nationals · Trends	30
	Watching Ronnie Belliard attempt to play first base –- in particular, watching him maneuver his drumstick legs on and around the bag –- is like watching a rhinoceros attempt to play Hacky Sack. ... Meanwhile, Nats pitchers issued 13 walks in 13 innings against the Brewers on Sunday. I appreciate the symmetry, if not the discipline.