Andy Rooney: Sleeping In America

(CBS)  This commentary was first published on Oct. 11, 2009.

I keep reading about the problems people have falling asleep and staying asleep nights. An organization called the National Sleep Foundation did a study and it says the economy is making people sleepless. Wouldn't they just.

I feel for all those people who aren't sleeping, but not sleeping is not my problem. I can sleep night or day, sitting, standing or lying down. I often fall asleep right here at this desk. Last week I took a bus cross-town in New York City and went six blocks past my stop because I fell asleep.

Someone took a poll several years ago that reported on what time Americans go to bed every night and how many hours sleep they get. The poll showed that we sleep eight hours a night, which was no surprise to me. But, I think I can get along on seven hours though. I can take eight but anyone who gets nine hours sleep is sleeping his life away.

If you figure out how much sleep you're going to get overall in your life, it's really depressing. We all sleep away about a third of all the hours we have to live. Now, how in the world did we let that happen?

I suspect we all get more sleep than we need. What we need is some kind of gauge like a thermometer that would tell us when we need more sleep and when we've had enough. Never mind the alarm clocks.

When the battery on some gadgets needs charging, a red light comes on or a bell rings. We should all have something like it that would let us know when we've had enough sleep.

I'm lucky because I'm a very quick sleeper and I can sleep anywhere. Some of the best sleep I've ever had has been in movie theaters during bad shows or in front of the television set.

I try to go to bed early Saturday night so I don't fall asleep during the football game Sunday or while I'm on 60 Minutes. I hate when that happens.
Written by Andy Rooney

[scottyusa]

Andy, I am just like you. I can sleep anywhere anytime. I do have one problem that you did not mention. I am tired all the time. I do sleep really well at night in between the P breaks. I never get more than 3 hours of straight sleep at a time. One silver lining; during my night time P breaks I get to survey the yard and ensure everything is okay out there :-)

[tsigili]

Well, Andy, while I'm nodding off at times myself, due to age, I still have sleep issues at night. Always have, always will.

That just means I can't wait to retire, because 5 am comes entirely too early for me now, as I tire out much more, from the lack of good sleep, than I used to.

[sean1z]

I wake every day no later than 4:00am. A hard worked day before makes one sleep. I see no reason to sleep eight hours and join the social somnambulism.

[riolama]

I've got news for you Andy. If you fall asleep sitting down, standing up, on the bus, in the movies, and at your desk, you have a sleep disorder. Go to your doctor and ask for a sleep study. You may have sleep apnea, especially if you snore!
One thing you didn't say is that you fall asleep driving. Beware! Talk to your doctor. People with sleep apnea are at greater risk for many ailments, including heart attack and stroke, not to mention car accidents.

[parisdakar]

So as long as you do your piece on it, sleeping at your desk becomes "research"? How many of us would get away with that? Andy, that's just irritating.

[SunDog8259]

Curmudgeon's generally don't hate mankind, just mankind's absurdities? I was expecting lots of semi-critical; but entertaining, reviews on Andy's latest editorial. I guess ill have to remain disappointed!

[ginko1028]

Yes, and yours was so very enlightening and entertaining. We hope not to disappoint you next time o'grand poo bah.

[aldon61]

Andy, old pal, you really blew it on this one. There are many reasons that some people can't and don't get enough sleep. Most of us do, in fact, worry about finances; this, in turn, produces other anxieties and gradually interferes with our personal lives causing arguments with our spouses. I suspect that your ability to get a good night's sleep derives more from financial security then anything else. I do envy you for your ability to get a good night's sleep, but most of us won't be able to join you, so do us all a favor and stop gloating!

[drcobolinCP]

Weird Al Yankovic put it best "I'll sleep when I'm dead".

[RayChiTown]

Weird Al never said "I'll sleep when I'm dead." He said "I'll be mellow when I'm dead", but not "I'll sleep when I'm dead."

[ginko1028]

Andy,
You're a pretty good guy, but I think you have passed-by curmudgeon and become just irritating. Good on you that you only need 7 hours of sleep a night. (I suspect you make up with about 3 hours of napping and what might be kindly called 'meditation'). Your judgement about the rest of us who want more sleep is (I suspect) rooted in your puritan gene. You and Cotton Mather would have gotten along fine, telling us how we're all screwed up. We should feel guilty because we aren't living up to what God put us here for; editorializing is a like preaching. There's actually nothing wrong with sleep; in fact, I love sleep. I kinda wish you'd sleep a little more, maybe even missing your next show. Retire, please!!!

[helloall34]

Unfortunatly, I doubt he has an email account let alone knows about cbsnews.com forums. You could send him a letter via snail mail but I doubt he would read it because there is likely already a big pile of snail mail from 10+ years ago still waiting to be opended. It is really a sad situation. It has been allowed to go on way, way too long. I really do understand the concept of respect for my elders, but enough... Give someone else a chance. Unfortunately they also haven't really gradually replaced the reporters on the show either and because of that the show is likely doomed.