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CBS/ September 7, 2009, 12:46 PM

Polishing Your Online Dating Profile

There are plenty of ways to go wrong when looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right online, as tens of millions of Americans have.

But there are also strategies to help you avoid dating disasters and meet people who may be compatible with you.

CNET Senior Editor Natalie Del Conte got some tips from Match.com relationship expert Whitney Casey, and shared those insider secrets on getting noticed, getting results, and avoiding the moves that turn others off, on "The Early Show Saturday Edition."

It all starts with your picture -- the very first impression you'll make on a Web searcher as you try to stand out from the crowd.

"Your main picture, the one that everybody sees, needs to be a clear view of your face. You can be smiling, you can be doing whatever," Casey says. Avoid black-and-white images, and ones showing you younger than you really are. Photos showing natural views of you, or ones with you displaying personality, such as ones in which you smile broadly, are preferred. And don't use photos cropped from larger ones: "A crop-out it a cop-out," Casey observes. Also, steer clear of images of you appearing depressed.

When building your profile, "Answer the who, what when, where, and why," Casey advises. "Really make your personality stand out. If you're serious and you want serious correspondence, then write it very seriously. If you want playful, write it playful."

Tell things you feel strongly about. For instance, "I would never date anyone who didn't have a smart phone," Del Conte says. "I'm really short. Does that matter?! ... I hate celebrity gossip. ... I don't know if I want kids. ... I can't go a day without peanut butter. ... I have zero tolerance for tardiness."

"One of the things (Casey) really recommended," Del Conte told co-anchor Chris Wragge, "was to be honest and to also let your friends kind of help you with this process, because choosing the profile picture and writing your mission statement can be really daunting."

Wragge noted that honesty really is the best policy. "It's like writing a resume," he said. "If you do get a date, the truth is going to come out."

"There's no point in the bait and switch," Del Conte agreed. "Eventually, you want to take this conversation offline, because one of the timelines that was suggested was a couple weeks of Internet chat, a couple weeks of text messaging, then a phone call and then an actual meeting in person. So, if you're not being honest, that's not going to improve your chances of a successful date."

How much should someone include in his or her profile, and how much do you want to leave for that first meeting, so you still have something to talk about?

"One of the things that they had said is no answer is an answer. So, if you don't put that you are a smoker, that is saying something. If you don't put your religious beliefs, that is saying something, too. So something to be implied in silence."
Copyright 2009 CBS. All rights reserved.
3 Comments Add a Comment
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rf35 says:
They make it sound like creating an on-line dating profile is rocket science. The real trick is finding the right site that will have people who share your values, relationship goals, etc. There really is a site for everything out there so it pays to find the one that fits you.
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svaldez9 says:
Hi jlnd, that is a really funny reason not to try an online dating site. The information a con artist would need to take advantage of you is not available publicly on these sites. You would have to supply it to the con artist. So, the people who are vulnerable to con artists are the ones who either don't know to watch out for them or are not sharp enough to realize they are dealing with one when they come in contact. It seems like your comment was based on some kind of misunderstanding about how online dating actually works. To learn how to become an online dating success story, check out the blog of VirtuaDatingAssistants(dot)com beginning on Tuesday (9/8). We will be publishing great online dating advice and secrets on our blog!
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jlnd says:
Like I am going to post my information on a dating web site for the various scammers from Nigeria, Bosnia etc. and make myself vulnerable for con artists? Don't think so. . .surprising how Match.com ignores the fact that they have been the target of scammers and cons in utilizing the service for malicious intents.
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