Kate: Jon's The One Who Wanted Out

Couple Living "Separate And Apart"; Show Draws Record Ratings; Production Halted For Now

(CBS/ AP)  Now that Jon and Kate Gosselin’s split is official, new details are emerging about their 10-year marriage, and the lives they led off-camera.

In her first interview since filing for divorce, Kate told People magazine Jon wanted out for a long time.

"He does not want to be married to me anymore," Kate told People. "No questions asked, he went and hired a lawyer and said you better get one. So I did. I never would have made that step; I never would have done it."

Monday night's show, in which the couple announced their separation and divorce, drew a record audience of 10.6 million viewers.

When they told their eight kids, Kate told People, she and Jon never used the words "separation" or "divorce."

"I’m not naïve," she said. "I know that my kids will come out of this, to a degree, with some sort of dysfunction. I’m not stupid."

Michelle Tan, a senior writer for People magazine, said on The Early Show Wednesday that Kate is "going through a myriad of emotions."

"There are days where she feels relief," Tan said. "Right now, this is the end of a lot of tension that’s been building for the last six months. To actually have a resolution, albeit not a happy one, she’s sensing some relief but, at the same time, she’s feeling like she’s failed. This is a woman who has never quit at all at anything she’s ever done."

Tan added one of the 8-year-old girl twins actually said the announcement wasn't a surprise to her, and she could have guessed it would happen.

As for the smaller children, Tan said it’s going to take time for the news to sink in.

She said Jon and Kate have told the children their lives will continue much like where they are now. But, Tan said, Jon and Kate will take turns being in the house.

The couple plans to spend equal time with their children at the $1.1 million house they moved into last year, with Kate staying elsewhere when Jon has custody and Jon making other living arrangements when it's her turn, according to a statement Jon released to the media.

"And the little kids just said, 'You know what, it’s great, when is my next snack?"' Tan said. "They’re very young. It will take time for them to register."

Kate insists the show isn't to blame for the dissolution of their marriage.

She told People, "This is a situation that absolutely would have happened whether the cameras were here or not. I don’t want people thinking we traded marriage for fame. Ever."

Attorneys for both Jon and Kate Gosselin said Tuesday that the couple lived together on their Berks County, Pa., compound until recently.

But, the divorce filing, according to People, claimed Jon and Kate had been living separate lives for two years. Kate’s lawyers explained that away, People said, as a misunderstanding of "legalese."

"They have been living 'separate and apart' just within the last week or two," said Jon's attorney, Charles Meyer, using a term from the divorce petition.

But, as CBS News correspondent Susan Roberts reports, the official word of the moves for divorce has raised the question: How much of the Gosselins' reality show was real -- and how much was staged for the cameras?

Kate's lawyer, Cheryl Young, said Tuesday the couple has already started negotiating the terms of the divorce.

TLC has halted production of the show, People says. The next new episode, the magazine said, won’t air until August.

[IRENEDV]

Notice that Kate doesn't deny telling Jon "Its over" first, as he's claiming. She's just saying he was the first to talk divorce. I don't blame him. She tells him that its over, but want to keep up a charade for the paycheck with TLC. Meanwhile their marriage is loveless and a sham? Who wouldn't want out. SHE is the one to initiate all of this, not Jon.

[PreciousNH]

I am sorry but this comment :
"I?m not naïve," she said. "I know that my kids will come out of this, to a degree, with some sort of dysfunction. I?m not stupid."

makes me a little annoyed I enjoy John & Kate and I am a child of divorce and I don't think there is anything wrong with me. So I don't think that you should jump to conclusions about your own children and assume just because you are divorced your children will have a dysfunction. It isn't fair to the children. You are being stupid if you continue to think this way.

[hollywoodmini]

Kate, I can't imagine the stress you must have been under with all those kids so close in age. John however has always been my favorite because I liked his sence of humor. I have now totally lost all respect for him. How does he think his kids are going to feel when they see him all over the news with this new young party girl? I hope Kate has enough guts not to let him stay in the house nor bring that flusie around her children. I've heard John say over and over how young he is to be dealing with all those children. Can't he wait to be out partying and what ever else for a few months so his kids can get used to all the changes. I hope Kate will get her two oldest into some counceling, it could make all the difference in their long term mental health. Please don't think the little ones won't be affected too. I feel very bad for the children. John, I hope you're having fun because what you're doing is very damaging to the little lives that you brought into this world.

[mommyo2]

It takes two people to make or break a marriage. Being married for 21 years I understand neither of us is easy to live with all of the time. The cameras of course are going to show the most interesting parts. If Kate were always the perfect wife and Jon the perfect husband, we would not watch. It is easy to say Kate was domineering and Jon was much to passive. It is easy to say Jon gave up to easily or Kate pushed him away. Oh Posh! If you truly love someone, you will work harder in the tough times to make it work. It is sad that this family has fallen into the cracks of divorce. I pray that they will remain civil for the children and work to ensure their happiness. Right now Jon does need to reconsider his priorities. It makes me a little sad that he feels he missed out on so much fun. The grass is not always greener on the other side and the greatest accomplishments in life are not parties and travel, they are those little ones that grow into wonderful adults and fill our lives with rich memories along the way.

[lohandicap1]

I watched about 10 minutes of one show and decided that I can't stand that b***h! I don't blame that dude one bit, except that I would have left that skank the first (and last) time she slapped me. She's getting what she deserves!

[reinafarmer]

People do look at themselves which is why some of us are repulsed by TV programs like this. All of us have made mature decisions and choices. Jon and Kate are the exception to the rule. I am judging them not from TV but what we saw before they hit national television. They lived in our community. What nurse or medical professional deliberately gets pregnant with 7 fetuses knowing they have no way to provide for these children? Sure they received criticism from us their neighbors - what is to keep someone else from doing the same thing? Do you want us to encourage irresponsible behavior in our society? It was irreponsible behavior which brought these children into the world. I am not impressed. Sounds harsh - but not any harsher than the world is going to treat these children who now seem to be abandoned by both parents. Now there are 8 children being raised by babysitters and nannies. Growing up there used to be a show called "Eight is Enough." Jon and Kate could have been the updated version of this program instead they decided to travel the low road and wallow with drink, drugs, questionable friends and relationships. Great heritage for their children. Sure people are critical - who in world wants their child to crawl into the hole with people like this?

[Kurdistani]

I will add some things:

it is interesting to read how people draw the different cut-throat conclusions about this family and the couple based oon their interpretation of what they have seen on TV. Face it, it is difficult enough to understand a person while living with him/her in the same house - yet to do the same thing on a weekly based one occasion tv-show. Many seem to think they have grown into the dynamics of this family and forget that they ar evaluating this family through edited footage subjected to financial priorities of producers and directors through a camera lense. What I think is the real deal is that most of these people project their own lives onto this couple. They think their own wives are B´s or their own husbands are A´s - and by reading off minor patterns within Jon and Kate they think they have everything figured out. My tip is - take a looooong studying look at yourself in the mirrir and think - wasnt it yourself you were describing?

[Kurdistani]

Well, we can be sure of one thing. Kate wont be subjecting these kids to parental alienation...

[reinafarmer]

Let's see they both go through IVF to produce a brood. Then seek to find a way for the public to pay for their irresponsible behavior. Personally I think that the court should deny a divorce and sentence them to life with each other. Put the kids up for adoption and hopefully the children will forget that they were conceived by two self-centered, conniving, money seeking morons that all of us want to forget. You know I really don't care if Kate is a witch or Jon feels put upon. They are the adults and these children did not ask for these parents. Furthermore, they should revoke the medical license of doctors who perform IVF and leave kids like this with mentally deficient parents. The doctors wanted money to produce the kids. The parents decided to capitalize on the "mistake" caused by IVF by going after public funding and publicity. Jon's girlfriends are all looking for fame and fortune. Everything about this situation is sick.

[NEONSWANG]

I THINK JON IS PATHETIC. BRAGGING ABOUT HOW HE IS OUT HAVING FUN. THE REASON KATE CONTROLLED SO MUCH IS BECAUSE HE DIDN'T DO THINGS OR HELP OUT LIKE SHE NEEDED OR LIKE THE KIDS NEEDED. SHE NEEDED TO CONTROL THINGS BECAUSE HE NEEDED TO GROW UP!!! WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED WITH HER OR THE KIDS IF THEY WAITED FOR HIM?!! HE SEEMS VERY SELFISH BEYOUND WORDS WHEN HE CAN WALK OUT ON HER AND ALL THOSE KIDS AND THAN TO BRAG ABOUT BEING OUT HAVING FUN. I COULD BE HERE ALL DAY TRYING TO THINK OF THE RIGHT WORDS TO DESCRIBE HIM.

[minnemom]

It's 'interesting' that now Jon just got back from a tropical vacation with a 22 year old. Went on a ski vacation with another younger chick. Doesn't he realize that like any other soon-to-be-divorced guy that they are after the money? They weren't lined up for his charming personality or dedication or commitment to anything(let alone his hairline) before? It's a sad sign of our times that guys quit a marriage and think the young chicks don't see the $ signs--because they do--it plays out all over the place all the time. Raising a family isn't easy, but I guess he found the easy button by only having to be there part time. I'm not saying that Kate is blameless or anything, but she's working and raising money for the family and continuing a normal life--not going on vacation after vacation. Vacation from what, Jon? I have more respect for Kate at this point because of Jon's behavior.

[rockrooky]

Per usual the populace becomes a mob hating some woman. Neither of them seem to warrant hatred. Jon was passive aggressive, telling Kate and the audience that her behavior was a turn on to him. Kate was bossy. Too bad they didn't at least try marriage counseling. If his tastes had changed or her bossiness had become too much, why not stand his ground and fight for his marriage. She probably would have respected him more if he had stood his ground. It very likely would have revitalized and balanced their relationship. I believe, except in cases of violence, that marriage counseling should be tried when there are children.

[erink4251]

IT WOULD BE NICE TO LET JON AND KATE TAKE CARE OF THEIR PERSONAL LIFE. IT'S THE SHOW THAT'S PUBLIC. LETS TRY AN TEND OUR OWN BACK YARDS AND STAY OUT OF THEIRS

[kathyh12345]

IT'S NOT NICE TO SHOUT! (ALL CAPS) they greedily take $75k an episode and that is inviting us into their personal business. if they dont want us there they need to get their greedy butts off the air. dont count on it. kate thinks she is a big star now. we'll be lucky if we ever see the end of her mug.

[josavy]

First of all, I will be honest, I watched this show frequently. I enjoy reality shows and this was my favorite. It saddens me that this couple couldn't work things out. Oh by the way, you can b**** all you want about my comment, does not hurt my feelings:) I always found Kate was abrupt with Jon, but honestly if she didn't take charge, who would?? He certainly didn't have the balls to do it, or at least that is what we were led to believe. I think they both set their selves up for this, if they had of worked on their relationship before this escalated, then maybe this wouldn't be happening to them. I feel for the children, the ones who will suffer the most. They are a lot of oh I wish they had of done this or that to save their marriage, too little too late now. Yes Jon took a lot of s*** from Kate and Kate had to step up and take control, I felt alot of the time her anger was resentment that Jon never stepped up and took control and she was always telling him what to do next, she needed a man/father who could take control, so she lashed out anger that he wasn't capable of this. I watched this show for a long time, Jon wasn't abused, he was bossed around yes but not abused. In the episode where they announced the divorce, I was so pissed at Jon, talking about his second chance and he was excited, how he never got to do things for himself... OMG grow the f*** up! 8 children and he is whinning about not having time for himself, lol. Well that would be life if you have that many children. I have one and time to myself is rare, naptime and bed, that is it and that is all I need. With parenting comes responsibility and I think both Jon & Kate need to keep their act together for the children and think about them. Whine and cry in the privacy of their bedroom when no one can hear them, other than that, don't do the blame game to the media, it will get back to the children eventually. Ok, I have ranted enough. As a fan of this family, I hope they both can find happiness in the future and the least amount of harm to the children the better!

[mma_bear]

This is a very sad situation. I don't doubt for a moment that these parents love their children but I think it is time to end the show. These children should not be coping with the divorce of their parents in front of a camera. It disturbs me that this marriage has been crumbling for two years now yet there was big deal made of their vow renewal.

Shame on Kate for getting wrapped up in the celebrity of the show. I understand that it was a wonderful opportunity, initially, to make sure there were college funds for her children but she is fooling herself if she believes it has nothing to do with the break up of her marriage.

Shame on Jon for being such a child. Just how hard did he try to communicate his dissatisfaction with the marriage to Kate and how hard did he try to make it right. How does he think opting out of the marriage is in the best interests of the children. I don't think one should necessarily stay in a miserable marriage but by all reports these two have not done the work needed to either save the marriage or end it properly.

Finally, shame on all of us for being voyeurs into these people's lives. We make celebrities out people who ill deserve the celebrity...Paris Hilton is a case in point. It's time to demand accomplishment and good behaviour from to those we hold in high regard.

[anditou]

Jon needed Kate to take control because he did not know what to do. He always sat around like he was lost or something. He had little or no patience with the kids. They needed a dad to be involved in their lives. They were becoming very spoiled. Kate was the one who disciplined with respect. He would just ask "what should I do?" Then he would put them in their chairs roughly or yell at them. He was a jerk to Kate. He knew not to show it or say anything to her with the cameras around. I'm sure he treated her badly off camera. One thing for sure-he was cheating on her. I would be short with him too if I had to live with him. He only wanted to play with them when it was something he liked such as skiing or golfing. If it was anything else, he was pretty hands off. I hope they continue the show with Kate taking care of the kids on her own. I hope he has to finally get a job again and pay lots of child support. I also think that any woman who wants anything to do with him while he is still married is scum. What goes round comes around. Maybe he'll come down with something. I wish Kate happiness. She is better off without him and the kids will benefit. I don't like the idea of him spending time in the home and them taking turns. This is a stupid idea especially for the kids. Who would want their ex in their home and have to go elsewhere to live? This is probably Jon's idea to get out of child support. He needs to get a job and a life.

[josavy]

Jon did yell and get impatient quite frequently with the children didn't he? Kate was matter of fact and rarely yelled at them...actually having a hard time thinking of any moment where she was snarky to the children.

[unbelievable-seriously]

BOTH ARE GUILTY FOR BREAKING UP THIS FAMILY!!! But I side with the guy on this one.
Jon - he has a lot of growing up to do. What guy doesn't though? Is there one guy out there that a woman would not have 1 little pet peeve about him. I don't think so.
Kate - she needs a reality check. From day 1 to now, the family's fame and fortune has gone to her head. She takes that over the peace in their family. Knowing full well that there were some issues between her and Jon, she chose to fulfill the show over meeting the husband's needs. Both spouses need each other's support. I've seen go one way so far.. it's been Jon who was supportive. No job is more important than your family. Forget all the glam and items you get for having more money. I'd rather be in debt and be happy with my family than be rich and alone. Money is the root of all evil. Money drives greed and hunger.

[kayliia]

Let's find out what Jon is made of. Let's say Kate is in emotional turmoil and needs to leave the kids with Jon for how ever long it takes. Let's gauge Jon's reaction when he becomes sole caretaker to his 8 children with no idea when Kate is coming back. I bet the grass no longer looks greener on the other side! Big bad Jon might as well shelve his lil sports car and motorcycle, no room there for the kids. Jon is all about Jon. If Kate is a shrew, Jon chose her, then proceeded to make these 8 children, now Jon get off your ass and do the most important job you will ever have. If you mess this up there isn't much else left of your life and when you're an old man you will regret the fallout.

[chiree]

kate has seen her mistakes and would of sought help and asked jon for forgiveness. don't tell me she is the only woman in america who has berated her man. women will change to keep the family together where as men find it an opportunity to bow out. she wasn't thinking of another man and staying out all nite and shaming the famiy in public. jon could of cared less, this was his chance to not mend his marriage but a chance to go have a good time and not play daddy to 8. come on at least she has admitted failure, he sits there and gloats with pride that he just had poor judgement. you learn from your hurt and mistakes and rebuild, not jon he is like a dog on a hydrant, can't wait for more action. with his shape he must hae viagra cuz he is no stud by all means. check out kate in a 2-piece, she is a knock out for his short fat bod. i am sure he will not stop runnning to the bars as that is where his twit fans are. i doubt if he gets a job and goes to church to show us a descent side to his new life. i think any man who leaves a woman with 8 kids deserves nothing good in life. those kids need a full time dad and i am sure kate will change her ways and show a humble and regrettful side and god will give her the man she deserves for her kids. she will be successful even without the show, at least she showed remore and sorrow. jon is cold and callus.

[chiree]

kate will come out of this disgrace jon put her thru with her head held up high. she is a beautiful, intelligent, loving mother who should continue the show alone with the children as a mother struggling to raise 8 children by herself. jon deliberatly shamed her on purpose making it impossible for no other outcome. he is selfish, immature and does not want the responsibility of being a father full time to the kids he helped conceve. he wants to drink and hang out with young girls instead of cmmitting himself to the one obligation no man should ignore. having 8 kids and leaving your partner to raise alone is a man who has no real love for the meaning of the word family. what if kate wanted out to go be with other men, smoke grass and show the world by pictures of his reckless irresponsibility. she would be hated and called many degrading names. jon put pic out of deanna at there home sunbathing which was so disgusting and him out all nite, leaving her home early in the morning. what man who loved his kids would stay out all nite and know the tabloids would be catching his every move. deanna should be fired from the school she teaches at as she is totally a poor example of a teacher. on kates b-day he is shown with her out in public, he was still married and this shows what a disgrace this man is. he could not even be discreet for the sake of the children. he wanted to hurt kate and that he did with the most utter poor taste. she was on his ass but you could tell he had to be told things as he certainly had little interest in his obligations. now he displays his loving side to the kids playing out front to show what a devoted dad he really is, thinking the tabloid pics of him will show a different side. the public can't be fulled. he should of sought counseling and if that did not work he should of privately ended there marriage.i am outraged at the hurt and shame he put upon his wife and kids claiming 'poor judgement'. as you will see in his new life he will run around with women and drink and party. he is nothing but the average 'dirtbag' that deserts his family cuz he wants a different life for himself. i want him off the show for good and let him squander the profit he made off his kids on his meaninless life he has chose. there are 8 kids at stske here and to leave your wife alone to raise is someone who thinks only of himself. he says 'i am only 32 and hae my whole life ahead of me'what a statement to make. what does kate have-responsibilities for many many years to come. i wish her happiness and bless the strong woman she is no matter what the public says about her. if he writes a book about her i pray god seeks revenge. this is the mother of his kids, who in there right mind would even think this thought. you have brought her to her knees with betrayal that is enough. get out of the picture we are not interested. you are just like the man who gets a girl pregnant and runs. you are not that hot hunk of a man you think you are, when your money is gone there isn't much there, kate deserves better. she realizes her mistakes but you sit there with the look of relief like 'oh boy am i gonna have a good time' you are not thinking of a career only the side of an irresponsible idiot. lets see what the tabloids show of your new life jon. i am sure it will show who you really are and your kids will google you and those pics will never go away.