Gisele's Comments On Stepson Turn Heads

(CBS)  Gisele Bündchen is once again turning heads, but now it's not because of her supermodel looks.

This time, all eyes are on her because of comments she made to Vanity Fair magazine, saying she feels her stepson is all hers. The boy is the son of Bündchen's husband, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, and his former girlfriend, actress Bridget Moynahan.

In the latest issue of the magazine, Bündchen reveals that she knows the boy, named John Edward Thomas Moynahan, has a mother and she respects that, but it doesn't matter that Bündchen didn't actually give birth to him, because Bündchen still feels like he's her son.

In her own words, "To me, it's not like, because somebody delivered him, that's not my child -- I feel like it is, 100 percent."

Brady and Moynahan dated for about two years before calling it quits. Shortly after their split, the actress announced she was pregnant with the quarterback's child.

Dr. Robi Ludwig, a psychologist and contributing editor for Cookie magazine, tells Early Show co-anchor Maggie Rodriguez that, while the supermodel's intentions are good, there could be room for misinterpretation.

"It sounds like she considers herself maybe a mom replacement," she tells Rodriguez. "And that's a no-no in the stepmother role."

Ludwig advises Bündchen and other stepmothers not to try to replace the biological mother, but to instead be a "substitute, wonderful adult" in the child's life. Ideally, she adds, the two mothers should try to have some sort of relationship because, if children sense competition between the two, it may be disruptive for them. "They feel they need to make a choice," she says.

But having a relationship with the biological mother doesn't mean the two must become friends -- Ludwig says that can be difficult, especially in a case such as Bündchen and Moynahan's. But the goal is to develop a relationship that leads to a happy family life for all involved, in which everyone has a role and can get along.

Another way to reach that goal is was Ludwig calls including each other in the "family ritual," giving examples such as having both mothers attend a parent-teacher conference, a soccer game, or holiday celebrations.

"I think people need to think out of the box when creating family life for stepfamilies and including everybody," she said. "There's a place for everyone if you can think clearly and not be competitive."

However, she stresses that these relationships aren't easy.

"We have these images of 'The Brady Bunch' or 'The Sound of Music'…where it's instant soup, and it's not like that at all," she tells Rodriguez. "These relationships take time, and hopefully they're for a lifetime so that they change as the years go on."

[rrmmatt]

Being a step mom is one of the hardest but most rewarding thing. My step son calls me MOM. His mother and I do not have a relationship. I have tried numerous times to talk to her, to let her know...i have no intention of "taking" her son from her, i have no intentions of ever.EVER..making him chose....she does all that. she talks bad about my husband and I. She makes his choose....I tell my stepson... HIS mom....thats his heart...its ok to love her more, or its ok to trust us both...etc....hes only 7... I have bitten my tongue so many times in the past two years...i am surprised its still attached!!! lol....ITs not about whos the real mother, or whose the beter mother...its about the child. Sometimes I feel as If my hubby and I do a better job..but again, its not about what we feel...its about what this little boy feels.At times i feel as if this is my child...and i forget that he is going home to his mom...as he grows and starts to understand more about what is going on...i do feel he wil understand my role...... he is suffering because of the MISTAKES his mom and dad made.... My step son confides in me more than his mom but still at the end of "our weekends"....he going home to his mom... home is where the heart is....

[chiree]

i think it's wonderful step-moms bond and end up loving their step-children but gisele needs to remember it's not her child. she constantly parades him around like he's her son.maybe tom brady should be holding the child when they are in public. after awhile it is offending to the birth mother. gisele have a child if you want to dote on one so bad or is tom not wanting another right now. it took him awhile to step up to the plate with this one. he should know it is insensitive to bridget for gisele to be photographed everytime with jack. maybe the visits should be one on one with tom for awhile until gisele backs off. she is self-serving and very disrespectful, go count your money instead.

[sarad33]

I've known women who have married guys with children and didn't think of the children as their own. That is a messy situation. I totally get what Gisele is saying. She loves this little boy as her own, what else could someone ask for. If my man and I split and my children were being mothered by someone else while with their father I would only hope she was as kind as Gisele and treated the children as her own.

The media is looking for drama. Would they rather Gisele say "the boy isn't mine so I'm not going to love him. Instead we will have children of our own that I can love." Whatever! Dr. Robi is an idiot. He obviously doesn't understand the dynamics in extended families.

[rhubarbidoo]

i think it's great that gisele is welcoming her stepson with open arms. would everyone rather her reject this child and treat it as a second class citizen? also, i think we all need to realize that english is not gisele's first language. we all knew what she meant, and still the media attacks her this way.

whats wrong with people..

[indecision01]

I don't think Gisele meant that she was the mother of Bridget's child. Gisele merely made a point that the transition of accepting her boyfriend's son was easy because it could have very well been a deal-breaker for her. What Gisele said was beautiful and sounds like Bridget's got sour grapes. BELIEVE ME.. If Bridget found the right guy she could only hope that he feels the same way Gisele does in a stepchild situation. Ultimately, what matters is that Bridget's son is being loved and well-taken care of by everyone who will be involved in his everyday life. I love Gisele's comments and hope all step-mothers could feel the same way. By the way, I love how Bridget wants privacy for her son yet made a very public announcement about her pregnancy during Tom and Gisele's vacation as a new couple. People in glass houses.....

[kishbme]

I agree 100% w/ mkm99. The media is always looking to throw daggers at someone.

[Ichabod09]

Romance and the emotions involved tend to make both men and women sound like idiots.

[saturn05]

Sounds a little kooky and self-serving.