Neb. Law Lets Parents Dump Kids Of Any Age

Controversial Measure Allows Them To Leave Kids Under 18, Not Just Infants, At Hospitals, Firehouses, Police Stations

(CBS)  Every state now has a "safe haven" law allowing parents who can't care for a newborn to drop him or her off at a "safe haven," such as a hospital, firehouse or police station.

But, reports Early Show national correspondent Hattie Kauffman, the last state to adopt such legislation, Nebraska, added a controversial touch.

Nebraska's new statute allows parents to drop off kids of ANY age up to 17.

And sure enough, Kauffman says, this past weekend, a 13-year-old girl was left at a hospital. Earlier, 11 and 15-year-old boys were abandoned at hospitals, and a 12-year-old boy was dropped at a police station.

Neb. State Sen. Brad Ashford says he's "not surprised," but has no regrets about the law. "Quite frankly," he told Kauffman, "if the stress level gets to the point where something bad could happen, I'd rather have that child, whether it be ten years old four years old, (or even 15)... to me, the child is safe."

But, Kauffman points out, critics fear the floodgates are open. Kathy Bigsby Moore, of Voices for Children in Nebraska, calls the law a mistake, saying, "These are parents and caregivers who are saying, 'I can't handle this child by myself,' "leading to the child being placed in an "already overflowing" foster care system.

Kids who are dropped off are brought to an organization called Project Harmony for evaluation, Kauffman explains. Counselors say the biggest hurdle is convincing them that being abandoned isn't their fault.

But don't be so quick to blame the parents, cautions Connie Hammitt, whose 17-year-old daughter has had behavioral problems since she was 5.

"A lot of the focus has been on the cruelty, the aspect that the child is going through abandonment," Kauffman remarked to Hammitt, who immediately responded, "Walk a mile in my shoes, and then you would have the right to say that to me!"

"Were there times," Kauffman asked Hammitt, "when you considered dropping off your child, if you could have, if the law had been in effect -- would you have done it?"

"I would say that, yes, I, as a parent, would drop her of," Hammitt replied.

Says Moore, "I have spent 30 years of my life trying to create systems ... that serve the best interests of children. And I don't think this safe haven law does that."

CBS News legal analyst Lisa Bloom told co-anchor Julie Chen in New York Tuesday she thinks the law is "a good thing. I represented abused children for about ten years in my law practice. Anything that protects children from being abused or neglected, I'm in favor of.

"I think it's time to tighten up that law a little bit, so that not just any child can be dropped off at a hospital for virtually any reason, which is what we're seeing.

"But still, children are difficult to raise, and out-of-control teenagers can be even more difficult than a newborn. I think this is a good recognition by the state of Nebraska saying, 'Look, we want to help parents of out-of-control teens.' "

What about those concerns about sending the kids into the overburdened foster care network?

"Maybe we should come up with an alternative, then," replied Bloom. "What's interesting about this approach is, parents can drop off teens or adolescents for a day, or a week, and then reclaim them. Usually, foster care proceedings are instituted involuntarily against a parent -- a parent doesn't want to let go of that child and forced to give up that child -- but what about a parent who simply says, very honestly, 'I can't control my kid. I don't have the skills, I don't have the resources to deal with it'? I think what we're seeing in this story is a real wake-up call that we don't provide much help for parents like that, and maybe it's time we did."

Are there alternatives for parents who are having problems with their teenagers at home?

"There are," Bloom says, "but it's very difficult. A parent could institute a relinquishment proceeding. But that could take a lot of weeks or even months, a lot of expensive legal bills. Most parents aren't capable of doing that. Parents have to turn to family members, friends, to take an out-of-control teen, but a lot of parents don't have that option available."

[bluegill557]

In responce to Onemoretime. I don''t know your situation and I am not one to judge. Please check with your relatives to see if any can provide a home for your children. If they refuse, seek help from social services. Dumping your children off should be a very last option and not treated as a simple way out. I''m sure there are many families like mine who would be willing to foster a child. All my children are grown and having a child around is something my wife and I have been discussing. Social services has a list of foster parents they can contact. Please do what is best for the child and not yourself.

[zay117]

Another problem our society is having is the child support system sucks. The law puts the other parent to pay child support, now you have a single mother that depends on this money to raise a child, but when the parent goes out of the state where the child support is entered the law does not protect you or the child. This single mother that is trying to raise a child does not have money to hire a private lawyer to make the father pay or even worst if you don''t know where the other parent is the law can''t help you is all a big joke. The state won''t help you raise your child is a bunch of bull.

[zay117]

Much of these problems is our own fault. We need to stop threating parents with going to jail because we can''t discipline our own kids for bad behavior. The sooner you correct the problem, it might not become a problem in the future. What happen to respect you parents and your elders? Now instead we can''t punish the child because is against he law. Is a bunch of bull. At the long run the state is paying the praise with over populated jails.

[barbi61671]

i agreed that measure need to be taken so that people can''t just drop off their child without viable reason, but we do need laws that allow this for parents who have exausted all other alternatives. especially in cases of single mothers who have noone to help. I know of several cases where a single mom is afraid for her own safety from her children. she has asked the state and local law inforcment for help and has even pleaded with the court systems. she has been physically and mentally abused by her 2 teenage boys for several years and the only thing the law tells her is that she will be prosecuted for abondonment if she leaves her children. she sleeps at night with her bedroom locked and purse in bed with her as they also steal from her everychance they get

[balance8]

I was disheartened by both CBS and Omaha''s local news reports on this issue. I think Connie%u2019s interview was extremely misrepresented. The CBS Early Morning News made no attempt to include well spoken insights which would have productively supported why she would leave her child at the hospital. Local channels made it sound like these families who are dropping off their children are simply bad parents and the problems the child is having are entirely the parent''s fault. Nebraska came out looking like a benevolent state that is committed to the well-being of children and families and that parents have reasonable options when they need help. This simply isn''t accurate. Families are struggling out there without a sufficient safety net to catch them when they are falling. There is no quick and easy fix when you are dealing with severe and persistent mental illness. The average parent should be grateful that they don''t have a clue what these parents go through - the shame, the anguish, the guilt, the fury, the fear...that come when you are unable to get your child the help they need. Those who have never parented yet have strong feelings and opinions about this issue should perhaps consider volunteering at a family organization. They just might learn something.

[alindgr1]

This is terrible, plain and simple.

[biomegaly]

I was 3 when my mother beat me with a leather belt. I can still feel the welts on my buttocks, eventhough they''ve been gone for 35 years. I don''t know what happened to her, she had a meltdown. I took some of my brother''s money for the ice-cream man and she freaked out! I was 3 years old. She was a grown-up, mature adult. I don''t think the punishment fit the crime. I wish she could have dropped me off until she got her head screwed on straight. I hope this helps in these types of cases. I''m sure the law needs to be tweeked, but just the fact they''re doing something is SOMETHING, and something is better than nothing.

[eviltuner]

I''ve met Mrs. Hammitt, I know that if she would have known that her story was going to be chopped and twisted to make it sound like it''s ok to get rid of your kids cause your selfish, she never would have agreed to do the interview. When you have a child that you can''t control and the state then takes them away because they got caught doing something illegal or the parent turned to the state for help, it makes matters worse. Most foster homes in this state are in it for the money, not the children, I''ve seen it first hand. So then that child acts out more, cause now no one cares. The whole time the state is pointing the finger at the parent, when in actuality all that parent wanted was help but were denied it for whatever reason. It so easy to point the finger at the parents, control your child. Well, how do you control a child that has no self-control. Lock them in their room? Then the child is taken away for neglect. Spanking doesn''t work cause now it''s abuse. This state requires parents and the child to go to counseling if the state takes control, from what I''ve seen, that is very little help. To make a long story short, like everything in this world, the good that this law is suppose to provide will be abused and taken advantage of by those that don''t need it. Just like other state and federal funded programs. The law wasn''t intended for an easy way out, but a last resort when all other options have been exhausted and failed.

[tootall10142]

YOU HAVE TO BE LOVED TO FEEL LOVE.MY FATHER WHIPPED MY A-@SS ON A REGULAR BASIS BECAUSE I DEFIED MY PARENTS ON A REGULAR SCHEDULE.I NEVER FELT THAT I WASNT LOVED.ONE DAY IT DAWNED ON ME THAT I COULD SENT AWAY AND I WAS IN A OFF BEAT WAY STEALING AWAY THE PEACE THE WORKED TO MAINTAIN.THEN I REALIZED I WAS BULLYING MY PARENTS BECAUSE I WAS THE CHILD AND THEY HAD TO PUT UP WITH ME NO MATTER WHAT.I HAD RATHER BE WHIPPED THAN LIVE IN THE FEAR OF BEING THROWN AWAY.THE HEAVY HAND OF A PARENT IS LIGHTER ON THE SOUL THEN THE BURDEN OF KNOWING THAT YOU DESTROYED YOUR PARENTS LOVE FOR YOU.

[slim1h2o]

OK, now that people are on the right track, and it''''s not just about "bad parenting and birth control", and it is about appropriate assistance and treatment, or lack there of, for families and kids, my work is done. For today....


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Posted by socialwkr1 at 05:10 PM : Sep 23, 2008


Typical social worker. Declares her work is done, and hasn''t even responded/or did not respond to my post.

Yup, its after 5:00. that''s when the caring stops for her.

Typical.....

[barbaram99]

Every one has a right to their say lass. I am a daughter of a Vet. As long as there are vets and the constution in this nation we all will have our say and this is for all who wish to post. I have been posting for over 2 years on here. That said.
We were talking about this issue at table at supper.
I know the life of a foster child. I still at 53 cry in my sleep. I was not awear of it till I was told so. I still have a memory of Mum walking out and I was 5. I think it is awful that that Neb passed this up to 17. Lazy fools. I think they Need to Tie their tubes when they dump their child on the town/state. I had that done for health reasons years ago. We fix pets so they can''t breed. I pity the children who are dumped.I was one of them. I would rather the a newborn who has no idea of family to be placed at hospital. How would ye feel dumped so Mum can party. My Mum was 17.She had to leave high school at 16 marry at 16 and in 54 she had to as she was carrying me. , Then she dumped Dad and us for another man she later married. We were in sep foster homes A hell of a life. Every home barred me from using my name.They did not care about me a leaglly blind person from birth. I think girls need to be educated so they don''t have unwanted babies and the same for the boys.

[cbhammit]

When I did this interview it was to help others in my situation. Once again, as so many times before words are twisted to look different then they were meant to be. Once again a child has been failed by our system.
When I sought help for my child I did not leave her at a hospital and walk away as this article so indicates. I am an active part of my child%u2019s life. I never gave up; I never allowed hurtful words such as these to interfere with what I thought was best for her.
I did say %u201CI would leave her at a hospital but only after I said %u201COnce all avenues have been exhausted%u201D.
It%u2019s seems that there are those who do not understand the term Mental illness, or what it%u2019s like to live with a child who suffers and cannot get help because of people just like you. Most parents are afraid of what others will think or say about them so they do not get the needed help due to stigma. It%u2019s a shame our children must suffer at the hands of ignorance.
I do not even become upset at statements like these written below anymore. I have heard them for 12 years and choose to continue to move forward, I am determined to do what I feel is best for my child not what you feel is best. How many of you %u2026.. have sat up at afraid to sleep in your own home?

[truthislife1]

Love covers a multitude of sins, which includes the childs'' and the parents''.

(There they go again, some dumb Christian who does''nt know what he''s talking about)

[bubbabear200]

Shucks only at age 17 or below. ***
Do you think they would take my 28 year old son? Will not work, eats like a horse.
TEEHEE

[paris1969]

I think children, no matter what age, should not be kept in an environment where they are seen as a problem .. it only leads to mental and physical abuse.

[paris1969]

I think children, no matter what age, should not be kept in an environment where they are seen as a problem .. it only leads to mental and physical abuse.

[kennergirl]

Then why did they get rid of orphanages? This is basically the same thing.

[caliengineer]

One more step toward state control of children.
Other plans in motion: MANDATORY health care, RFID chips, and "vaccinations"
North American Union
One national bank

[catlady1412]

I don''t think this is the best answer. These people with difficult children don''t ever realize that they are the ones who made the children become little monsters. So they made a mess and now they can just unload it? What about making the parents undergo psychiatric evaluation and other parenting classes while they get that break they think they deserve? If you ask any one of them, they will tell you that they are a good parent, it is just the lousy kid they got stuck with! They need their heads fixed worse than the kid does!

[barbaram99]

I was raised in foster homes from the age 5 to 19. It was a hell of life. I am about to turn 54. So it hurt growing up not knowing month from month where I be living. It was hell. I will say this and I believe this. The adults that dump their kids for selfish reasons they don''t have my respect. They are just thinking of themselves. Have yer tubes fixed. I did years ago. I was 5 years old when I and my sister and brother was put on the town/state. I know their names. I have not seen them sence 1959. Ye think others want to raise yer kids well most don''t. If ye give them up then they will not see ye as Mum. I have no respect for my birth Mum. She dumprd me and walked out. Think hard befotr ye do this.