Can 365 Nights Of Sex Bolster A Marriage?

(WebMD)  If you decided to have sex every day, would your relationship benefit?

Two long-married couples decided to find out. When lovemaking fell off their respective "to-do" lists, they ditched the sweats, bought sex toys and books, stepped up exercise, lit candles, and took trips. Then they chronicled their "sexperiment" in two recently released books, Just Do It: How One Couple Turned Off the TV and Turned On Their Sex Lives for 101 Days (No Excuses!) by Doug Brown and 365 Nights: A Memoir of Intimacy by Charla Muller with Betsy Thorpe.

But will daily sex really help a relationship that's hit a rough patch? Some experts say yes; others aren't so sure. As for the two couples who tried it, the Browns and the Mullers, both say the experiment strengthened their marriages in -- and out -- of the bedroom.

Charla Muller had been married for eight years to her husband, Brad, when she embarked on what she calls "the year of the gift" as a way to celebrate her husband's 40th birthday Rather than fixing anything wrong in her marriage , she writes that frequent sex made her happier, less angry, and less stressed.

Doug Brown's wife, Annie Brown, initiated the offer of daily sex after hearing about sexless marriages on Oprah. He had a similar revelation after they started having daily sex. A feature writer for The Denver Post, Brown writes of releasing "an avalanche of flesh pleasures upon our relationship."

"There's a special sense of being desired that only comes from sex," he tells WebMD. "You can be good at your job or at sports, but the daily confirmation you get through sex is a super feeling."


Reversing the Downward Sex Spiral

According to the National Opinion Research Center, the average American couple reports having sex 66 times a year. Newsweek has noted that 15% to 20% of couples have sex less than 10 times a year, which is defined as a "sexless" marriage.

Familiarity, advancing age, work pressures, the challenges of raising a family, and household responsibilities all conspire against regular sex among many otherwise loving couples who feel too harried to get physical.

When Doug Brown and his wife began their experiment in 2006, they were juggling two kids and two jobs. Married for 14 years, they averaged sex three times a month. And he admits he had performance anxiety .

"I felt I had to be a porn star or an Olympic gold medalist. That melted away with [daily] sex. We learned so much about each other. Sex became much more playful and that translated into a more playful union. We regained an electricity that wasn't always there before."

They also lost their inhibitions and embarrassment about the subject and gained confidence. "Now we can talk about anything."

The Mullers had a similar experience.

"I didn't realize how much not being [regularly] intimate stressed our relationship," Charla Muller tells WebMD. "I was a bit of a dodger, because I felt pressure to make it fabulous, because who knows when it will come around again? Now I'm not willing to give it up again."

She says an unexpected benefit of daily sex was the kindness it required of the couple.

"I wasn't expecting that. I thought we would only have to be really nice after hours. But we both had to bring our best game to the marriage every day. That was an important part of what went on behind closed doors."

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[jbirkey]

It is impossible to have enough sex to make you feel loved and accepted all of the time. When we try to do this we are trying to make something happen inside of us that only God can do. www.marriagewhatsthepoint.com

[elymayi]

I am realy glad I read this article. Me and my husband average 3 to 4 times a week in this arena, but he would like it to be more and I am eager to comply even though I get pretty tired. *** does bring you closer and it really does open the doors to become a better communicator in what makes you happy and any desires you may have. Its almost like a feeling of freedom to express what you like or dont like. For me, its about connecting to my husband and really enjoying ourselves through intimate interaction and afterwards it really makes him less stressed and just happy.

[cheeta21]

my wife and i have *** maybey once or twice a week even though my wife is 5 years older then I am. We did have had *** every day but that only lasted a month

[kaviz]

Hi ho hi ho it''s off to work I go.

[sly_64]

You mean I have to have sexxx only 365 a year ? Not good.

[barefootboy9]

Voltaire777 , youir mother need to change your diaper. Run home and let her do it and if you will be a good little boy, she may give you a soda pop. Be nice now.

[barefootboy9]

No it would kill me.

[gaye5]

Hey, the CBS must be running out of news, as this stupid bit of news article has been on their site for a few days now.
I have only come on here to put a message and still havent bothered to read it..

[ajaxtheleast]

You mean reschedule our yearly 265 from

supper time to night time, add 100 and

try to answer your question.!!???

I think not.

[powerman2001]

I couldn''t do it. I don''t have the energy. After work, i just want to eat and go to bed. On the weekends, it''s great. Maybe I''m getting old. BTW, never believe those folks that claim to have *** everyday. They are mostly liars.