Is My Baby Cute? Really?

Is Anyone Honest About Your Offspring's Looks? Steve Hartman Finds Out

(CBS)  What is it that makes parents think their own babies are the cutest babies in the world? What makes them so unabashedly biased? CBS News correspondent Steve Hartman tries to explain the phenomenon, using his own personal fatherly experience - and his son, George.

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Not long ago, we asked parents to send in pictures of both cute and ugly babies.

Nearly 200 people sent in pictures of their supposedly adorable offspring, but not one parent copped to having even an average looking child. It's not right, since logic demands that half of all babies must fall in the bottom 50 percent of cuteness.

That's why, after my son George was born, I tried to maintain my journalistic integrity. Now, the older he gets, the more I fall in love with him, the more I find myself thinking like all the other parents.

That's why I decided to find out once and for all, if my son is cute or not.

As I expected, everyone said he was cute.

After showing people a picture of George, one said, "That is a cute baby! Look at those eyes!"

"Look at the mouth!" one gushed.

"Oh, the big smile," said another.

The picture I originally showed people was an actual picture of my son. Then I started showing an “uglified” version. Believe it or not, everyone still gushed over my little monster, although some more convincingly than others.

"That baby is adorable,” one person tried to tell me.

I responded, “Really?”

“Oh, come on. Look at that smile … or the look."

One person avoided specific features altogether: "He, ahh, ahh, his, ah his enjoyment of life is obvious!"

And so it went, no matter who I asked, or how ugly I made the picture. I couldn't find anyone who'd give it to me straight. I even showed a priest the picture.

"Oh, good lord!" That's not an insect no?” was his first reaction.

I replied, “No, that's a hairy mole. He's still cute though?"

Father said, "Oh, sure it is."

At the risk of a lightening strike, I then asked Father Patrick if it's a sin to tell somebody there baby is cute when you really don't think it is.

"That's not a lie,” said Father Patrick.

“It’s not a lie?” I continued to question.

“Oh lord no, I wouldn't. There's all the difference between a lie and what they call a mental reservation.”

“Well, if that's true, then how do I know you think my child's cute?” I asked.

Father politely replied. “Oh, I see, because he is! This baby's a really cute little baby. "

I was about to give up and that's when I thought of Maureen Walach. Maureen heads up Wilhelmina Kids, a child modeling agency.

I showed her pictures of what George really looks like. Although at first, she too, couldn't help but be diplomatic, eventually, I got it out of her.

"What are you looking for?” she asked me.

“Honesty,” was my reply

“That's what you got," Walach said. "He's cute"

“It's OK, I've been looking for somebody to tell me the truth,” I reassured her.

“OK, the truth is the baby is very average! There you go!” she finally gave in.

I now had the truth. “How come nobody else would tell me my baby is average looking?” I asked her.

“Because now you hate me,” Walach said.

"No I don't!"

"I think you might," she said.

After all that, I've come to the conclusion that cuteness is relative ... if the baby's your relative, it's cute.

[smc2376]

Before I had my daughter, I was in the same boat as the person who said all babies were just big headed, slobbery blobs. But I think she''s the most adorable thing I''ve ever seen. That''s because she''s mine, even if she is slobbery. From an outsider standpoint, she''s probably pretty average looking. I''m just thankful she came out with the prescribed number of eyes, limbs, digits, etc. When I sent in the picture, she was even a little hairy, had peach fuzz along her jawline and arms. I was going to let Steve determine if she was cute or not. I wouldn''t be upset if he put her in the average category. Her father is part Comanche, so I hope she gets his to-die-for cheekbones. Steve, Little George is a cute baby and he has an amazing set of lips. He should be quite popular at high school make out parties. Yes parents, one day our little angels will be doing THOSE kinds of things. (I''m not looking forward to it either.)

[Marie Zarankevich]

The truth is, we are pre-programmed to respond to infants of all species with a cuteness twitch. -- The physical proportions alone make us think they''re cute, especially of the face. -- Ladies, and men, going ''ooh, and aah, and gurgle'' when confronted with a baby is how nature helps us preserve the species. -- All critters think their offspring are very cute. -- It keeps them alive.

[caeric]

Almost all newborns are ugly, almost all babies are cute. Maybe there is something hardwired into us from long ago that makes us more apt to overlook blemishes in babies.

By the way...

At the risk of a lightening strike, I then asked Father Patrick if it''s a sin to tell somebody there baby is cute when you really don''t think it is.

Steve, please tell me that the two glaring errors in the above sentence happened during the migration to the web.

[jboxton]

I''ve never seen a cute baby. They all look the same. They all look like big headed bald blobs with slobber coming out of them. Disgusting.

[tootall10142]

i was a long legged udly little cherokee indian baby and most indian babies are cute , how ever i was the exception to the rule.you have heard : so ugly that momma tied a pork chop around my neck to get the dog to play with me. Well my dog decided he didnt like porkthat well after all.I grew up 6ft plus some 245lbs im a big indian size 12ee foot. by the time iwas 18 the little indian girls down stream started coming around and its been uphill or down hill ever since. I guess that depends on the color of your glasses rose colored or other wise.

[eyewideopen]

Of course, when a baby gets ugly ENOUGH, it becomes cute again! I call it the E.T. effect.

[haoli25]

It must be one of Murphy''s Unwritten Laws, but it always seems that, the uglier the baby, the cuter the parents think they are. Please don''t ask the rest of us, we get tired of lying to you.

[kurlikew]

No, all babies are definitely NOT cute! They''re all innocent, sweet, and lovable, but they are not all cute. But as the article says, every parent thinks their baby is cute.

[kimstudiok]

I have seen an ugly baby. When I had my first daughter in 1982 the nurses mixed her up with another baby delivered at the same time to a woman with the same first name as me. When they brought her into me after cleaning her up I looked at her and thought this can''t be my baby, she is so ugly! I was horrified, after some time a nurse came in and said "you''ve got the wrong baby, we mixed them up". What a relief because when I saw my daughter she was the most beautiful baby in the world, and it continues...don''t ask me how cute my grandkids are!

[kimstudiok]

I have seen an ugly baby. When I had my first daughter in 1982 the nurses mixed her up with another baby delivered at the same time to a woman with the same first name as me. When they brought her into me after cleaning her up I looked at her and thought this can''t be my baby, she is so ugly! I was horrified, after some time a nurse came in and said "you''ve got the wrong baby, we mixed them up". What a relief because when I saw my daughter she was the most beautiful baby in the world, and it continues...don''t ask me how cute my grandkids are!

[cbinmt]

Steve
You obviously didn''t ask the right person. Your son is not cute. Yeah, its hard to say ugly but close! The next time you want an honest opinion get in touch. By the way the first thing I said to my daughter after she was born was "you don''t look so good", she started crying. Said daughter heads to med school this fall, we have a great relation.
I will say: At sometime in every childs life there will be a time when they are very unattractive and there will be a time when they are cute, infancy is rarely the cute faze.