The Preacher's Wife

A Reverend's Wife Is Found Dead. Was It Suicide Or Was He Playing God?

(CBS)  This story originally aired on May 10, 2008. It was updated on June 9, 2009.

Ever since Matt Baker's wife Kari died suddenly in April 2006 at the age of 31, the Baptist preacher has lived under a cloud of suspicion. Is he an innocent man unfairly accused as his followers and friends believe? Or is he hiding a terrible dark secret? Correspondent Erin Moriarty reports.

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Kari was a popular third grade teacher. She and Matt had been together since meeting as counselors at a Baptist day camp in Waco, Texas, in 1994.

"I would have been 23 and she was 20," Matt remembered. "I met her and I thought 'This is the person for me.'"

Linda and Jim Dulin remember their daughter was instantly smitten with the Baylor University senior. "The thing she kept talking about was, 'Mom, this guy's a really good Christian,'" Linda said.

And just three months after meeting, Matt and Kari suddenly announced they were getting married. By their first anniversary, Kari was pregnant with daughter Kensi; a second daughter, Kassidy, followed a year-and-a-half later.

But right after Kassidy's first birthday, doctors discovered a brain tumor and she was hospitalized. "There'd be days that it looked really good. Prognosis was good. And then turned around and went right back down hill," Matt explained.

In late February 1999, after a 90-day bedside vigil, Kassidy was well enough to go home. But just after midnight on March 22, Kassidy was rushed to the emergency room. This time doctors couldn't save her.

"To sit there and struggle that far. To come what I thought was so far to watch her die. That was devastating. It really was a very hard, hard thing to cope with," Matt told Moriarty.

It was especially hard for Kari. "She lost her child and she grieved hard," Linda remembered.

A grief counselor helped Kari get through the first year. In 2000, a third daughter, Grace, was born. But according to Matt, his wife was never the same. "I don't think it was a split second, all of a sudden she was completely different. It was a gradual changing of the person," he said. "She had almost two personalities in a way. Not negative. But when she went to work she had the ability to put issues behind her and focus on work."

"The other personality was a little bit more withdrawn at home," he added.

The way Matt tells it, he became "Mr. Mom" to Kensi and Grace. And from the time Kassidy died, Matt said his wife relied on pills to sleep.

Matt told Moriarty Kari used Unisom, an over-the-counter sleep medication. But he said she sometimes borrowed something stronger from family and friends.

And the toughest time for Kari was always the March anniversary of Kassidy's death. "It was always two or three weeks leading up to it. 'It's coming, it's coming, I can't do this. I can't make it another year. I can't do this again,'" Matt recalled.

In April 2006, seven years after Kassidy died, Matt said Kari was still struggling with the loss. So he took her to the doctor, who diagnosed her as depressed and prescribed an anti-depressant.

As they left the clinic and headed onto the highway, Matt said Kari had a meltdown. "And I'm at about 45, 50 mph and she is hyperventilating. And she attempts to open the car door," he recalled. "She said she needed to get out, get some air."

According to Matt, he grabbed hold of her waistband until he could pull off the highway. He didn't think it was a suicide attempt. "I thought she just wanted fresh air and wasn't thinking. She lost it for a second," he said.

[sharoncalla]

This story has been so "heart breaking" to read, I have read it several times, trying to get the facts straight, Kassidy was said to have died of a brain tumor on March 22, 1997. Kasi Baker later died on April 8th, 2005. Kasi grieved hard for Kassidy, the astonishing thing is the "date". April 8th, within 30 days of Kassidy's death date. This woman shows me, she was in a "hell" all of her own, perhaps only while she was sleeping she could dream of Kassidy, and missing her more and more between 1999 and 2005. Finally it just took it's toll. That's why I don't think Matt is guilty. His remaining daughters need him, and he needs them, to heal, to mend. Think for a moment a child of 2, all toddlers need their mother, maybe Kasi felt "compelled" in a strong way to be with Kassidy. She trusted "all below" to care for Kensi and Grace.The mind is a very complex map, and ties emotions inward, so and the fact that Kasi wanted Matt to go get gas/get movie just get gone somewheres, is another clue, that he is not guilty. So on one other time she tried to "jump out of the car". Suicidal people attempt until they suceed. March 22, of any year was a da' ja' vu' date for Kasi, a date so profound that it was unshakeable. I hope the entire family both sides find peace, love, and understanding. I really believe everyone loved and cared for Kasi. This is just my opinon and she would want the family to be "close" rather than estranged. I hope for closure and best wishes for all of the family. SC

[JFKShannon]

Once again, you did not know Kari. The "facts" of which you speak are based on Matt's lies and not backed up by ANY fact. You are basing your feelings of innocence on what? What a man indicted for murder claims? "The fact Kasi [sic] wanted Matt to go get gas/movie..." isn't a fact. It's a claim by a man indicted for murder. The "fact" she tried to get out of a moving car isn't a fact. It's a claim by a man indicted for murder. Since she died within 30 days and 7-odd years of Kassidy shows you some "fact" that she was in a living "hell all her own" and that's proof she took her own life? I, too, am glad you are not on the jury.

Why not look at the true facts in the case to base your feelings on? You know, sometimes people on trial for murder lie to get out of being convicted. Heck, he's even been caught on video and in numerous interviews lying and changing his story. Look at the science and timelines and forensics. Those don't lie.

The only reason I can come up with for you persisting to denigrate Kari (someone you don't know) and lift Matt (someone you claim you don't know) up is that you are not completely UNinvolved in this case after all.

[csi-lover]

Here's the deal; the preacher lied as his stories changed. And another lover on the side who has now come forward to seal his fate. But what I find interesting is how he said he found his wife naked and put clothes on her. Why does a preacher kill his wife? Because he thought he was God, which he is not. This guy will be seeing hell quite soon folks, mark my words. No one has the right to kill anyone and get away with it. Not even the devil...

[sharoncalla]

Dear JFK Shannon, my apology to you, you are correct I did not know Kari, but as a mother my gut feeling is I may have "attempted suicide", had I lost a child. I would have felt that God did not love me, and my only crime in suicide would have been to be with my child. When Kari tried to open the car door and jump out, if Matt did not love her he wouldn't have stopped her, this is when I felt like he should have intervened with psychiatric care for Kari, nothing wrong with getting counseling, he should of taken her that day, but he thought she only lost it for " a moment". I am sure he feels pain, he lost a daughter and a wife, I will pray that justice prevails. The move may have been to "get away" from where the tragedy occured. Too many memories for the children. Then as a reader we are not given all the facts, but the girls will feel an added loss, if their innocent Dad is sent to prison. It will only compound to their mental health. Glad I'm not on the jury. Please once again, accept my apology. SC

[JFKShannon]

I will accept your apology, SC. And you have to accept the fact that while you don't know Kari and all you're basing your assumptions on is a few stories in the news and the 2% of evidence that has been made public, I knew Kari and saw her almost daily. I have also researched this case on MANY levels including going down to the McLennan County courthouse to review the files myself first hand. I have talked to countless family members and friends and former churchmates of Matt and Kari's. I have corresponded with people in Waco, Hewitt, Dallas, Kerrville, etc; While I obviously don't know everything (no one could), I think it's safe to say I have a better grasp on the realities and facts here so you may just have to trust me on some things. When the case goes to trial in September, you will understand.

Also note that the only person that was in that car when Matt claims Kari tried to get out while it was moving that is alive to talk about it is the man indicted for her murder. I think there is a slew of ulterior motives for him to say so many things that, well, only he can "attest" to now that Kari is dead. His statements about Kari's mood, demeanor and spirit are completely contradicted by everyone else that had contact with Kari. Completely.

Kari had a close, deep and intimate relationship with her Lord. While I know she was deeply wounded with the loss of Kassidy, she did NOT feel that God did not love her. It's a slap in her face/faith to even suggest something like that....especially when you didn't even know her. I wonder what your real motives are to speak so horribly about someone whose life was taken and that you didn't even know.

If their innocent dad is sent to prison? What if their guilty dad wasn't brought to trail and remained free? Would that bother you? I'm trying really hard to accept your apology but you just hurt Kari again and again. Why is that?

"The dead cannot cry out for justice; it is a duty of the living to do so for them." ~LM Bujold

[hercule1122]

Everyone in this tale shares blame- the police who seemed to have done little in investigation, the medical authorities who botched the case, and a current of dumb people who said that the pastor could not harm his wife while he was seeking a new playmate for sex. Puhleeze, spare me from stupidity and idiots! The case is crystal clear for anyone who is willing to examine the details.

[virgosal]

"The truth will set you free." I'm glad Vanessa Bulls has decided to come forward and tell the truth. This is a woman with a conscience and Kari can now rest in peace. All her mother's suffering and ordeal should start to lighten and heal. The Preacher must have forgotten that there is an Unseen Hand in all of this.

[JFKShannon]

sharoncalla,
You obviously didn't know Kari. You couldn't be more off. Plus there is WAY TOO MUCH evidence to the contrary. For starters, Matt was only gone for approximately 45 minutes. She could not have consumed a bottle of pills, typed a suicide note, died, be taken by lividity and be cold enough to have died in an ice box....so say the experts....in 45 minutes. Of all of Matt's mistakes in his plan, the one that will do him in is that he didn't give himself near enough time in his timeline of the night's events. Add that in with his plethora of other mistakes and there's only one possible, realistic way this happened. And it has nothing to do with a "brain tumor."

[sharoncalla]

First of all, did this woman have a brain tumor? Which side of the family has this history?I think the puzzle may lie here. The mother felt maybe lesser of a person, lonesome for her child, and nothing could appease her, except death. Death to be in the relm where she thought her child would be. I think she loved Matt, and the two girls, but perhaps in her depression she thought she could strike a deal, ok I die and go see about Kassidy, and I leave Matt to take care of Kensi and Grace. Surely God would understand her acts of reasoning and perhaps extra pills taken caused an eventualy "build up" over time, enough to stop the heart. The body showed no acts of violence, stab wound, bullet holes, so and the death of Kassidy was real, just NOT acceptable by Kari. This was the one thing she JUST could NOT ACCEPT, and it happened. I think she sent Matt out, so he could not "intervene" with "her plan". She locked the door to keep the kids from being the ones to find her. This is tragic and I would find Matt, not guilty. I just wish he could of intervened with a psychiatrist, but even that would not have appeased Kari she explained in the note, she wanted to hold Kassidy one last time. A "My Way" type of story. Sad!!!!

[lsc--2008]

His story does not make sense. Unisom is diphenhydramine, the same thing as Benadryl. It is an antihistamine which main use is to treat allergic reactions. Drowsiness is a side effect that is exploited to help people fall asleep. This would never be a drug that someone would choose to use if they wanted to die. I don't know offhand what the lethal dose would be, but I have never heard of anyone dying of a diphenhydramine overdose, so it would not be easy to overdose on it. And, when her body was finally examined, no pill residue was found, which certainly wouldn't be the case in an actual oral drug overdose, where there would be numerous capsules/tablets in various states of dissolution left behind in her g.i. tract at the time of death.

I also think the way he was trying to portray her as some sort of a "fallen" woman because she had to take sleeping pills after the death of their daughter shows his total lack of knowledge and concern, and compassion. He was just trying to tar her with an "addict" brush to make her look bad. But literally millions of people take sleeping pills every day in order to get regular, wholesome sleep. They are not addicts, immoral or somehow mentally ill for doing so. The days of the barbiturate-type sleeping pills where people actually would become badly-behaved addicts and could die of overdoses are LONG gone. Modern sleeping pills such as Ambien, Lunesta, and Sonata are quite safe and can be taken regularly without need for dose increases even after a long period of time. They are not precursors to suicide. They certainly could be used to sedate someone before murdering them as appears the case here.

[carolcape]

It was commented that if she was going to commit suicide, there was in no way that she was going to be found in the nude, she would even think of that before she did it. Then there is the timeline with the colours and all that were on her body. This bastard is evil and he should get what's coming to him. Then at the end of the show, I understand his mistress came forward. Oh, he can't lie, it is shown all over his face. He made me sick watching him. Cruel for this to happen to this woman, so cruel.

[carolcape]

This was a show that was on before and I am so glad that this man was indicted. He has guilty looking all over his face. Imagine the shock when he didn't get away with it, the SOB. That was a very beautiful woman and she knew she was in danger. I can't understand why she didn't just take her children and go to her mom's and filed for divorce. She was right in her feelings of him killing her and it is a good thing she confided it. I hope he gets the death penalty. My cousin was just murdered down in the states and they are the same way, they can't believe he did it and are behind him. It is totally crazy. I mean we can all see, but the family at home when someone marrys, they just can't believe this ordinary men that look so great to everyone on the outside, are abusers of the worst kind and play in their minds how they are going to kill and then one day they just wake up an do it. More has to be done to expedite these criminals and the death penalty should be carried forward and not let them just spend days in jail. Pull the plug on the SOB and not waste the taxpayers money feeding them.