John McCain's Family Duty

Washington Post: Candidate's Life Was Framed By His Legendary Navy Forebears

(Washingtonpost.com) 
McCain's capture generated headlines across the United States. His picture ran on the front page of The Washington Post, with the headline "Held in Hanoi." He was filmed in an enemy hospital, and a copy of the footage was shown to his anguished parents. His father, McCain says, "got down every night and prayed."

A few months into McCain's imprisonment, his father was named the Pentagon's commander in chief for the Pacific, a job that essentially put him in charge of prosecuting the war. His father insisted that his change-of-command ceremony be held aboard the USS Oriskany, the carrier for McCain's squadron.

Throughout McCain's imprisonment, his father never penned him a letter, knowing that the enemy would use it for propaganda. But every Christmas, the elder McCain would fly to Vietnam and visit Marines near the demilitarized zone that then separated North and South Vietnam. At some point, McCain wrote, the admiral would walk off by himself and look out to the north over the frontier. He was searching for his son.

Early in McCain's captivity, the North Vietnamese, well aware of who their prisoner was, offered to release him. He refused, sensing it would shame his father and demoralize his comrades.

In 1972, the admiral was called on to implement B-52 bombing raids on Hanoi, where he knew his son was being held. "B-52s in those days were not exactly totally precision bombing," McCain says. "There was never a doubt in his mind what he would do. But still, you know your kid's there, and you're ordering the bombing of the area."

According to his book, McCain and his fellow POWs rejoiced at the bombings. "Thank you!" the Americans shouted as the ground shook and their guards scrambled for cover.

By then, their ordeal was almost over.

Peace accords ending the war were signed in January 1973, and McCain was released in March. His father, who had already retired and was in failing health, was invited to the welcome-home ceremony in the Philippines. He asked whether the parents of other POWs were invited. Told they were not, he declined.

Father and son were reunited a few weeks later in Jacksonville, Fla. "It was a very touching reunion," McCain says, between the war-weary, old-school admiral and the son he might have killed.

"He had aged," McCain says.

Before his son's release, Jack McCain had asked to stay in his post to see the war to its conclusion, but he was turned down. His father was lost without the Navy. And he believes that despair helped produce the heart attack that killed him in 1981.

On the day of his father's funeral, McCain retired from the Navy. "It was the first time in the 20th century," he wrote, that "the name John McCain was missing from Navy rosters."

* * *

Twelve years later, on May 26, 1993, McCain spoke to the Naval Academy's graduating class, an address that Timberg recounts in his book. McCain had just been elected to a second term in the Senate. Friends from around the country had come to hear his speech at the Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium in Annapolis.

It was a warm, breezy day and a triumphant moment. McCain's father had spoken at the academy's commencement in 1970, while McCain was a POW in Hanoi.

Among those present that day in 1993 were 1,050 academy graduates -- and 6-year-old Jack.

"For much of my life," McCain told the crowd, "the Navy was the only world I knew. It is still the world I know best and love most.

"Here we learned to dread dishonor above all other temptations," he said. He reviewed the achievements of past Navy heroes -- pilots and gunners and submariners -- and then spoke of his own ordeal.

"I have watched men suffer the anguish of imprisonment, defy appalling human cruelty . . . break for a moment, then recover inhuman strength to defy their enemies once more. All these things and more, I have seen," he said. "And so will you. My time is slipping by. Yours is fast approaching. You will know where your duty lies. You will know."

Jack remembers the day vividly, not so much his father's words, but the sight of all the graduates throwing their hats in the air in celebration. Even at 6, he felt a connection to the young officers in their Navy whites.

* * *

John McCain's white hair looks thin and wispy as he jokes with his son before the football game. His voice sounds gravelly as he tells stories and greets friends.

His presidential bid has been battered by money woes and a staff meltdown. It has also been hurt by McCain's stubborn support for the war in Iraq and by his vocal compassion for the plight of illegal immigrants.

"I don't believe I was intended to be president," he says. "I don't even believe I was intended to be a senator. But I do believe I was intended to do some thing, or things, that are a cause greater than my own self-interest."

As he chats in the hospitality suite, his son stands beside him, 50 years his junior.

McCain says he didn't pressure Jack to become a midshipman. "I never brought it up," he says, because "I was pushed very hard, and I was worried about the negative reaction." Still, McCain says, "I'm sure it was obvious to him that I'd be proud if he went."

For Jack, there was no resistance. No struggle with his father's legacy. When it came time to choose a college, he announced that he was applying to only one: the Naval Academy.

"It's a family tradition," says Jack, who thinks he might want to become a pilot like his father. "For most of my life, I've seen what Naval Academy graduates carry. I've seen the way they act, and how people value their opinion. . . . I've always been inspired toward a life of service. I don't believe that there's anything more noble than serving your country in whatever capacity you can."

Recently, he says, while passing through the academy's history department on the third "deck" of Sampson Hall, he spotted a bust of a famous admiral. The face looked familiar. He paused, looked closer and realized who it was: his great-grandfather John Sidney McCain.

[flreason]

"...Also why is it that the media doesn''''t put the same negative slant on women who leave their children, in many cases for the same reason?"
Posted by brianbwb at 05:54 AM : Dec 15, 2007

Far fewer women abandon their children than men. And you''re right, often the reasons are similar. We need more accessible support networks that will provide people of both genders with help--not just financial, but also counseling, health care, family planning, etc.--so that they have an alternative to abandonment of their children. Blame doesn''t benefit anyone, and the kids are the biggest losers when families and society point fingers rather than feeling, "there, but for the grace of God, go I."

Responsibility is a learned value. When our national leaders don''t take responsibility for their actions, and when they pursue self interest rather than common good, they set an example that selfish people use to justify neglect. Look at the Congress and Executive branch, who accept large salaries and whose perks continue even though their tenure may be short. Compare that with pay and benefits given to our military vets. We need better role models.

[realpatriot1]

downtowner,

Here''s a little enlightenment for you. Jesus was born in the middle east, he wasn''t a european caucasion. The depictions of Jesus in English illustrations are not God-inspired, they''re white man inspired. Regarding the rest of your comment, it must be translated from the Latin because it makes no sense.

Real Christians don''t compartmentalize God''s children by race; Obama doesn''t-how about you?

[brianbwb-2009]

Too many times I read the words "abandoned by the father", and I ask why do some not see that in many cases it is not abandonment, but more that at a certain point some men cannot find stable employment, for reasons beyond their control, and therefore are a drag on the child''s potential, and choose to leave, not from lack of responsibility or love, but to be less of a burden on the expenses needed for the child?

Also why is it that the media doesn''t put the same negative slant on women who leave their children, in many cases for the same reason?

[downtowner97]

No one can be elected to the office of president of the United States unless they believe an invisible man is in charge of everything.

There are a lot of people who are worried about whether the invisible man Obama believes in is light skinned or dark skinned. In other words, is he a Christian or a Muslim? My question is this: If he''s an invisible man, how can he have a skin color?

Christians are a lot like smokers. They love to share their faith like smokers share their smoke.

[wooha3]

Thank you for writing this wonderful story. But don''''t count on the heartless bloggers in this thread to understand or feel compassion for Senator Obama as a youth. They want to win at any cost, as if this wasnt about human lives, like loyalty to their ball team. People in our country need to ask: Who are we? What have we become? Senator Obama will lead us with unity, integrity and strength and restore our country to greatness. I intend to follow him. Obama 08!

[kailumego1]

I find his omission about his father "humanistic" and "down-to-earth" something a lot of candidates past and present lack..

And while I still only know a little about him, the information I''ve learned from a poster, I''ll give him the benefit for opening himself to the country with his heartfelt acknowledgment of his father, at least his not "cellophane" or "plastic". You can actually understand his logic and where he stands, which I can''t say about a lot of other candidates.

Rudy''s children hate him, so that says a lot, but considering the infantile logic of some people, he could have served 15 years in prison for murder and most of you would still vote for him.

He could be a prototype of "Ted Bundy", who was a Republican, and most of you would still claim he''s worthy of being "commander and chief" of this country just as long as it keeps a black man from being elected.

[keithle1]

I like Obama.

"Clinton-Obama 2008"?

I''d vote for that ticket in Nov.

If you vote for the Republican nominee, the earth will open up & swallow yew.

[keithle1]

Obama has lots of company in that department.

Oops. Me said something bad.

[rudy654-2009]

Maybe he needs to be a dad first, and worry about politics after the kids are grown up, if it''''s such a devisive issue to him. Posted by TheGateway1 at 11:27 PM

Like you care.

[kailumego1]

Ignorance is contagious, and from reading a lot of posters, it''s also malignant.

It is a courageous and honest approach to expound upon things you would rather shove deep into a closet--a courage that most of these lying manipulating candidates and past presidents strongly lack.

Haven''t heard too many intelligent responses challenging Obama''s strengths or weaknesses, only mutterings and ramblings of infantile logic.

And those that mutter these discerning comments are no more of a creditable judge of anyone''s behavior, especially when they lack to intellectual ability, by which to critically evaluate or analyze anything beyond their juvenile or pre-adolescent perception.

[rudy654-2009]

Then he found strength in his faith-mahomedanism.

Posted by mediapreachr at 10:31 PM

That would be yourself you are talking about. Have you ever thought of trying Christianity?

[erichsh]

Such a touching, heartwarming story, all warm and fuzzy. I wonder if any Repubican candidates will be accorded similar treatment.

[mediapreachr]

Barack Hussein Obama Jr
Father''s Abandonment Molded Obama''
Then he found strength in his faith-mahomedanism.

[wooha3]

Thank you for writing this wonderful story. But don''t count on the heartless bloggers in this thread to understand or feel compassion for Senator Obama as a youth. They want to win at any cost, as if this wasnt about human lives, like loyalty to their ball team. People in our country need to ask: Who are we? What have we become? Senator Obama will lead us with unity, integrity and strength and restore our country to greatness. I intend to follow him. Obama 08!

[downtowner97]

There is one absolute requirement for becoming the president of the United States: You absolutely must believe an invisible man is in charge of everything. W says that he doesn''t ask his father for advice, just his "Heavenly Father". Look how well that''s worked!

Being a Christian is like sitting through a movie with your eyes closed in the hopes you''ll get your money back on the way out. The worst of the warmongers in this country are religious, and base their love of killing on their belief in God. Obama, Clinton, Giuliani, Huckabee... all of them want to make sure they are on camera coming out of a church.

[tatzforme]

I find it sad that because he was not raised with his bioligical father that should be another strike against the man. Since when does that make a person less of a person??

[blancadebree]

The last thing this country needs is the son of an absentee father as President. Look at the wonderful parenting of which our current Commander Guy is the product. That''s what our country needs. More of the Decider.

http://blancadebree.blogspot.com

[deemsnyd]

I''m sorry, but I just can''t get over some of the ignorant, hate-filled bigots on this post. I am southern, I am a republican, I am a Christian. These posters do not represent me or what I believe. I so choose not to believe what I am reading to the point that I have come to the conclusion that these posts can''t be for real. I think some of them have got to be from posters of a more liberal persuasion who are posing as ignorant conservatives to make ALL conservatives look bad. That''s my story and I''m stickin'' to it.

[jowand]

Give Obama some credit he has gone along way on hard work and initiative. However he isn''t going anywhere in the Dem Party; it is as racist, under the table, as they come. The Dem Party is looking for victims and conspiracies, not true success stories.

[tatzforme]

I wish they would run on the same ticket - one for president and one for VP - WIN - and really tick the hicks off!!