Letters Reveal Mother Teresa's Secret

Book Of Iconic Nun's Letters Shows She Was Tormented By Her Doubts In Her Faith

(CBS)  In life, Mother Teresa was an icon — for believers — of God's work on Earth. Her ministry to the poor of Calcutta was a world-renowned symbol of religious compassion. She was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

In a rare interview in 1986, Mother Teresa told CBS News she had a calling, based on unquestioned faith.

"They are all children of God, loved and created by the same heart of God," she said.

But now, it has emerged that Mother Teresa was so doubtful of her own faith that she feared being a hypocrite, reports CBS News correspondent Mark Phillips.

In a new book that compiles letters she wrote to friends, superiors and confessors, her doubts are obvious.

Shortly after beginning work in Calcutta's slums, the spirit left Mother Teresa.

"Where is my faith?" she wrote. "Even deep down… there is nothing but emptiness and darkness... If there be God — please forgive me."

Eight years later, she was still looking to reclaim her lost faith.

"Such deep longing for God… Repulsed, empty, no faith, no love, no zeal," she said.

As her fame increased, her faith refused to return. Her smile, she said, was a mask.

"What do I labor for?" she asked in one letter. "If there be no God, there can be no soul. If there be no soul then, Jesus, You also are not true."

"These are letters that were kept in the archbishop's house," the Rev. Brian Kolodiejchuk told Phillips.

The letters were gathered by Rev. Kolodiejchuk, the priest who's making the case to the Vatican for Mother Teresa's proposed sainthood. He said her obvious spiritual torment actually helps her case.

"Now we have this new understanding, this new window into her interior life, and for me this seems to be the most heroic," said Rev. Kolodiejchuk.

According to her letters, Mother Teresa died with her doubts. She had even stopped praying, she once said.

The church decided to keep her letters, even though one of her dying wishes was that they be destroyed. Perhaps now we know why.

[dukeudevil]

What her letters reveal only cause me to respect her even more. She was a thoughtful person and not a religious fanatic. It''s good to know saints can be human, too.

However, I have diminished respect for all those who did not honor her last wish to have the letters destroyed. Nope, one just can''t trust those religious fanatics.

[mgpm-2009]

The devil surely attacked this holy woman, and she resisted this by perserverance in her faith despite her doubts. One does not do the work she did without faith. That she had doubts makes her human. That she continued to do what she did and live as she did makes her a saint.

[dukeudevil]

The devil attacked her?! Thanks for the morning laugh! (Did you actually read the article?)

[Ed0719]

"With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion."
- Steven Weinberg

[startide-2009]

dukedevil, I read the article, and just because it does not mention satanic attack doesn''t mean he wasn''t involved.

As a person of faith, I''ve questioned my belief in God over the course of my life. I turned my back on God for many years. And yes, I believe in a deciever as well as a reedeemer.

Is it only a person of faith that can respect her struggles to believe while continuing to fight for the underprivelidged outcasts she sought to help? Or... because you don''t have faith, you feel justified (and somehow vindicated in your own belief system) in mocking those who do?

[spiel1958]

The most severe test of one''s faith in God comes from witnessing or experiencing suffering, especially as Mother Teresa did, and as do millions across the globe every day. I already knew that Mother Teresa had experienced feeling abandoned by God. Caring for a severely handicapped child has provided our family with the same experience. But our daughter remains, and so did the poorest of the poor for Mother Teresa. Did she run away from her vocation? No. Have we given up on our daughter? Never! Suffering is ultimately a gift. It must be seen that way. How else can it be accepted or understood. Our daughter''s handicap has caused seemingly overwhelming hardships for our family, but we carry on, because her life has value and she is a gift to us. We struggle daily with what God''s purpose for us is, and we sometimes doubt He really cares, but our doubts are cast aside when see our daughter smile, and observe how much our other children love her. Mother Teresa experienced this love from her poor as well, and that is what sustained her, the agony of Christ on the Cross, seen in each suffering face.
I''m sure this book will be an inspiration to many who have doubts, and that means each one of us.

[irish2171]

Doubt is not necessarily a "bad" thing. Doubt can strengthen one''s faith. Unfortunately, the media often exploits the negative side of things to promote their best interest, selling media. True Christians won''t have any problem reading between the lines. We all have doubt, some more than others. The blind have doubt because they can''t see, but they still believe. I would be interested in knowing why her last wishes were not fulfilled. She was smart enough to know that we weren''t capable of understanding her letters without exploiting them.....that''s why she wanted them destroyed.

[revamv7]

This shows that Mother Tersea was human. We have fears and doubts even about our faith. There is nothing wrong with showing our weakenesses. No matter what she wrote or how she felt, she continued her work and that is great faith. Faith is continuing in the work God has give us to do even when we cannot hear from Him or feel his presence. That is why He gave us his Word. We cannot look at what we see through our physical eye. We must see things as God sees them.

For all the believers, now you know that you are not alone. This should give us great encouragement to do aa Paul say in Philippians, I press on to the mark of the high call which is in Christ Jesus."

[gumbo1962]

Surely, we should not expect people who are not led by the Spirit of God to understand anything of God''s Spirit. It''s like throwing pearls before swine.

Anyway, she struggled with her fleshly, human side, in which she had complete understanding was always present, and she naturally struggled against the spirit. But what she did through her faith and through the Spirit of God will never burn up, it will live eternally, just as her spirit will!

And hey! If you don%u2019t believe in the devil, well we%u2019ll find out when we die, who%u2019s right!
Yes Indeed!

Surely Mother Theresa knows the mysterious truth now, and she has no doubt about her faith anymore! And she surely has no more cares about this old world!

Yes, I wish they would have honored her wish!

Talk to the hand Baby, Talk to the hand! Cause it%u2019s funny that you believe that you are a devil!

[pensadr]

I completely agree with revamv7. We have to question our faiths, otherwise it becomes fanaticism. Faith backed by reason is stronger and last longer because it is always updated with new findings. She was human and had her weaknesses%u2014it is those doubts and the fact that she kept helping others that made her even more spiritualised.

[nexgen99]

She was good person who dedicated her life to help others. I am sure she struggled at times, but she never gave up, even in moments of doubt. Most of us wish we only had that type of perseverance.

[monkfellow]

Someone told me that "saints aren''t born,they''re made, of human failings, human doubt,and human triumph".
Mother Teresa had a myriad of doubts: about her mission, her role in a society that was stratified in human terms, and the ability to rise about the difficult.
I am sure we''ll get all the Christopher Hitchens-wannabees, attacking faith life in general and Mother Teresa specifically.I will not judge their motives. But,kiddies, think before you issue a rambling attack on this woman.

[anothername1]

Nobody is calling into question that this was a good woman. She dedicated her life to helping those less fortunate. But her losing her faith is not a testament to her faith...can no one see this? She died not believing in God. She had denied God. Not because there was anything wrong with her but simply because she came to realize as more and more people are, that there is no God. Science is winning. People are leaving behind all the myths and superstitions and coming to realize what we really are. Even the Pope has recognized evolution recently. I feel sad and pity those who labor and sacrifice their whole lives for a god that does not exist.

[soquilii]

I imagine she, like me, wondered how a loving God could allow the misery she saw in the people she cared for.
If he sees everything that goes on, why does he not DO something about it?
I imagine she felt overwhelmed. She, after all, is doing his job for him.

If God is all powerful he is not all good.
If he is all good he is not all powerful.

[tomar0317]

Faith in God and his works I believe are maybe difficult to understand. This fine person did God''s work even with doubts of her own but to have such doubts only means, to me, that she truely did believe in God and what she was doing. Christians don''t do things for others expecting to get something in return. They do it because it needs to be done. The satisfaction comes from within us. God is within us.

[tom10926]

If you have worked with the missionaries of charity, they admit to daily struggles. I have never witnessed humanitarian work so helpful to so many underpriveledged, I can only say I have witnessed my version of goodness and how I believe the world would be much better if we used some of their actions. She was human, I don''t have the authority or knowledge to address the being I believe in called God.

[cburn665]

I wouldn''t make so much out of this not-so-new revelation. Like one of the earlier writers said, it simply shows her human side. Which one of us haven''t at some point had doubt?

There''s going to always be those who wil try and use this information to lend credence to his or her atheist belief.

...what is most important to remember is that she stayed the course.

This revelation changes nothing for Christians.

[nwihoosier]

soquilii, you need to take a course in critical thinking. Your logical thought process is, shall we be kind?, terrible

[monkfellow]

Not because there was anything wrong with her but simply because she came to realize as more and more people are, that there is no God. Science is winning. People are leaving behind all the myths and superstitions and coming to realize what we really are.
-
really?
--
That will come as a surprise to those who do not consider themselves "little more than gods" and who consider their work in science and medicine,yet realize their work is the fruit of God''s love.Only those "know everything" learn too late how little knowledge they possess.

[davidhinkson]

God is all powerful AND all good. He allows suffering to happen in this brief mortal experience to see if we as fellow travelers will do anything about it. Mother Teresa and the Good samaritan passed the test. Will we?

[docadams3]

To admit one''s own frailty is itself an act of faith. For those who, in absolute terms, deny the existence of God, the universe cannot make any sense. Her descriptions of what it was like to doubt are indicative of experiencing His absence. That is why we should seek Him. Faith is not an act of will, it is a form of knowing and seeing, that produces our acts. Mother Teresa''s actions showed what she knew.

[thinkharder-]

We have fears and doubts even about our faith. There is nothing wrong with showing our weakenesses. Posted by revamv7

You have some nerve thinking you have identified a "weakness" in this saintly woman''s character. Looking into the above story, I see no sign of weakness, only brilliant signs of strength. I mean heaven forbid this women acted with the sort of tenacity and courage she espoused on her own accord. This woman was not showing faith and humitilty to any sense of devinity, only strength and conviction in compassion for those around her. And from what I see in her letters, she did this because she was a shining example of the level of compassion all people should show towards one another. This shows that she was a mark of humanity, and closeness to divinity means nothing.

[abigail70]

docadams3, that was extremely well said. Thank you!

[huskerarmy]

I am sure we''''ll get all the Christopher Hitchens-wannabees, attacking faith life in general and Mother Teresa specifically.I will not judge their motives. But,kiddies, think before you issue a rambling attack on this woman.
Posted by monkfellow
Then certainly you don''t understand Hitchens in the least. He would be the first to judge her based on her deeds and not her professed faith. Most televangalists on the other hand...

[rushman71]

anothername1: Uhh, when ever you "actually" find evidence, facts, whatever makes-you-happy info on the non-existence of God, you let me know!!! GOOD LUCK ON YOUR SEARCH!!! YOU''LL NEVER FIND IT!!!

[infidel_us]

In other words, she was a genuine human being. Of course the SP''s will run with this. Thank you CBS. I doubt if you''d run a story like this if she was a muslim - you cowards. Christians are just easy targets for your kind.

[thinkharder-]

soquilii, you need to take a course in critical thinking. Your logical thought process is, shall we be kind?, terrible Posted by nwihoosier

Not so. As far as I can see, SOQUILII has daone much in the way of critical thinking and has made one of the most lucid comments posted to this article so far.

"If God is all powerful he is not all good.
If he is all good he is not all powerful."

If you have no expination as to why the above quote is engaging and realistic, don''t downplay it as if its the result of naivity, when it is clearly thinking at its clearest.

[richhong]

To read about someone with perfect faith, turn to Matthew, chapter 1, verse 1, and start from there. The rest of us aren''t Jesus.

This article serves to tell me that Mother Teresa never stopped thinking, never stopped exploring ger faith. She is more esteemed in my eyes. Her faith seems even more real.

[emtak1]

Sounds like she was pretty miserable sometimes...suffering can help make a person a more compassionate person or it can make you a bitter synic.

From her life it seems Ms. Theresa took the former road...and lit a candle in the darkness that through persistant work turned into a bonfire.

Jesus understands doubts.

He had to go to the point of letting Thomas stick hid fingers in his wounds to convince "doubting Thomas" that this was his old teacher, and friend Jesus. Thomas was distraught with sadness too. His friend had just been nailed to a cross and killed.

After the Pentecost, Thomas went East it is thought, while other of the apostles went West or remained in Israel.

Of all places he seems to haved ended up in India where his presence seems to reinforced by Christian churches there.

The apostle-skeptic with perhaps the biggest doubt went into a land with one of the oldest religions, and appears to have converted many from Hinduism to Christianity.

2000 years later another, continued the work. It appears now that she was full of doubt too.

But she continued and hadn''t any wounds to press her fingers into, to allay her fears, except those of the poor. Maybe she could have taught Thomas something.

"Blessed at those who do not see, yet believe."

[nyckate]

monkfellow - everybody has doubts in their religion, their choices in life, their work, their lives ...

I don''t care taht you don''t believe in God - what I can''t figure out is why you lot are so angry that there as those of us who do, who find strength to get through the hard times, solace through the grief and joy through the gifts we know come from God.

Why is it that you aethiests are always so frigging angry, bitter and fearful?

[sandy19731]

So,
the question to all you Christians is,

Did God let her into your heaven, or not?

Since only faith is required, her good works count for naught. And the faith, well....

[oleander8]

"Christians are just easy targets for your kind."
[Posted by infidel_us]

Infidel - your thought processes continue to amaze me. You poor, sad soul.

[gheemaster38]

If there is no God, No Jesus, No Allah and no faith. Then, at the leas this woman shown us all we could truly be loving and helpful to each other.. She demonstrated the key to humanity survival in these traumatic times... There was a line in a movie I saw once and I think this is a good occasion to quote it: Of all the souls in all the galaxies... Hers'' wash the most "Human."

[barbaraf4]

The most amazing thing about Mother Teresa''s crisis of faith is that she continued her work in spite of it. Most of us, even on our best day, wouldn''t be able to brave the slums of Calcutta; however, she did it day in and day out, year after year.

Is she a saint? I don''t know. Is she a hard-working, well-meaning woman? Absolutely!

[yborangel]

Why is it that you aethiests are always so frigging angry, bitter and fearful? nyckate

Because the atheist believes God has abandoned him, and the martyr believes God is punishing him. Both have established their own blocks to the presence of God''s love. Mother Theresa demonstrated only love through her works...demonstrating God''s presence on earth.

YborAngel

[infidel_us]

Is she a saint? I don''''t know. Is she a hard-working, well-meaning woman? Absolutely!
Posted by barbaraf4 at 09:58 AM : Aug 24, 2007

An excellent point! Her character and courage are beyond reproach - especially by the likes of secular ''progressives.''

[thinkharder-]

Why is it that you aethiests are always so frigging angry, bitter and fearful? Posted by nyckate

Isn''t this a case of the pot calling the kettle black? Laughable...

On another note, I''m tired of people stating things like, "people are realizing more and more that God does no exist and science is right." First off, as a chemist, stop demonizing science. Science is a tool to help lead to certain kinds of awareness...not a hammer used to beat back the faithful.

As far as faith is concerned, its not for me, but I am a good person not for fear of hell, but like MT up there, because I know of no other way to be.

Faith in religion from my viewpoint is a bit fool hardy on the part of humans. I mean, you have to realize that we are really nothing more than infintesimal specks atop infintesimal specks in the grand scheme of things. To believe God has a special purpose, or that we are important to him in light of the vastness of our surroundings is as much a sign of human arrogance as it is religious faith. And don''t take that as an insult. Arrogance has its plus sides, but so does a questioning mind.

[infidel_us]

Infidel - your thought processes continue to amaze me. You poor, sad soul.
Posted by oleander8 at 09:53 AM : Aug 24, 2007

Well, what a ''coingkydink''! I feel the same way about you leftwing libs.

[invitingall]

Whoever has issues with faith can resolve it by following two simple steps:

1. First think how so many complex things are so nicely happening in a microscopic biological cell
and be convinced that there is a Creator.

2. If you achieve step 1, then ask to that Creator to direct you to the right faith.

I''ll not tell you which religion I belong to. However, trust me it works, God responses
if you sincerely ask. And ask to the unknown Creator of this universe, not to the God of any particular religion. The true religion exists, and God will show you which one it is.
I wish I could tell it to Mother Teresa when she was alive.

[gheemaster38]

Since only faith is required, her good works count for naught. And the faith, well....
Posted by sandy19731 at 09:53 AM : Aug 24, 2007

according to the Bible faith is not enough. You have to be a worker in the faith (James 2:26 states faith without works is dead) So if you believe that faith is enough to get you into "heaven" then you will be sadly mistaken... Of course I feel that if some of the people (ministers included) I see here on Earth that say they are going to Heaven considering their bad deeds and attitudes actually make it.. Then most us would rather stay on Earth.. It would be a lot peaceful here then..

[dolly49]

I think that just about every Christian has doubted their faith at some time or other in their walk with God. It does seem that the Lord withdraws His presence sometimes in order to cause us to stretch and grow in our reaching for Him. After all, the Bible says we are saved by faith in the death and resurrection of Jesus paying the price for our sins. Jesus told Thomas that %u201Cblessed are those who haven%u2019t seen yet believe%u201D. Thomas doubted his faith and Jesus, but he remained one of Jesus%u2019s disciples. God doesn%u2019t give us a lot of tangible things to cause us to believe, but He also doesn%u2019t give up on us just because we don%u2019t always %u201Csaved%u201D.

The Bible says that the world would know we are Christians by our love. Mother Teresa certainly had love, whether she felt it all the time or not. Why else would she have sacrificed so much for the poor and sick of Calcutta? Thank the Lord our salvation isn%u2019t based on what we always feel, but on the atoning work of Jesus Christ.

[carolrhill]

There is not a person in the world that does not go through a time in their lives that faith does not leave them. She was HUMAN she saw a lot of things that we will never ever see in our live time. She was in the middle of the horrible things that were going on and things were not getting any better but she was with the people that needed her the most and for that we have to thank her.
You see your people dying everyday from things they need not die from and you pray everyday that GOD will help them but it just doesn''t seem like it is happening but she was there for them and that is all she could see.
Sure I can see why she felt that way at times but she never stopped being with her people.
GOD WILL ALWAYS BLESS HER NOW THAT SHE IS WITH HIM ON HIS RIGHT SIDE!!!

[thinkharder-]

1. First think how so many complex things are so nicely happening in a microscopic biological cell
and be convinced that there is a Creator.
Posted by invitingall

Um...they may be happening nicely for you, but you should try being a ribosome one day, then tell me how nice things are down there. Sometimes I wonder if its worth the debate, but it would help to really do some digging into cellular biology before making sweeping statements that are apparently the baseline from which your entire outlook on life, the universe, and everything are derived. Some use science to bolster atheism...some use it to bolster faith. GET OFF THE SCIENCE TRAIN...and use it for awareness and thought provocation. That is where its value rests.

[voteleft]

athiests are angry because they see the tragedy of the hipocrisy of organized religion and the blight that it is on the human condition. we are angry because fear is being used to control people. we are angry because organized religion is a threat to american freedom.

there is no god, there is no devil, there are no angels and there are no demons. there is only positive and negative human energy. life is what energy does. smiles, happiness and good deeds are good for the human animal in much the same way exercise and good diet are.

[random_radar]

One person with doubts who does good works is worth more than all the professed believers in the world who are hypocrites. Show me your faith without works and I will show you my faith by my works.

[oscarez]

Mother Teresa just came to understand that there is no God. How could there be a God and what kind of God would allow children to die from AIDs, leukemia and child abuse. Don''t say its the work of the devil, you will just be showing your stupidity.

[brianbwb-2009]

Regardless of her faith, or lack thereof, the work of her hands was a positive input to life. Bush, on the other hand, has faith so strong that he claims god speaks to him, but is responsible for the worst war crimes since Hitler.

God seem to be whatever His claimants want him to be, so in essence, if there is a god, people have rendered him irrelevant to modern life.

[hhusted]

Mother Teresa just came to understand that there is no God. How could there be a God and what kind of God would allow children to die from AIDs, leukemia and child abuse. Don''''t say its the work of the devil, you will just be showing your stupidity.

Posted by oscarez at 11:02 AM : Aug 24, 2007

athiests are angry because they see the tragedy of the hipocrisy of organized religion and the blight that it is on the human condition. we are angry because fear is being used to control people. we are angry because organized religion is a threat to american freedom.

there is no god, there is no devil, there are no angels and there are no demons. there is only positive and negative human energy. life is what energy does. smiles, happiness and good deeds are good for the human animal in much the same way exercise and good diet are.

Posted by voteleft at 11:00 AM : Aug 24, 2007

Both of you are lost souls. Athiest hate God because they don''t understand. They felt a huge tragedy in their lives and decide to blame God for the reasons. God is not to blame for the evil and dying. It is SIN. When Adam sinned he brought the pain of death and disease to the human race. Open your Bible to Genesis and you''ll read it for yourself. I will take a unbeliever aside and show proof positive that you are wrong and by the time I''m done with you, if you don''t believe that means the Devil has to locked up under his spell so greatly, or you are that dumb and stupid.

[bobpomeroy]

Thank you Mother Theresa for expressing your faith through your doubts and works. You give hope in a world of religious fanatics and plain old liars who use God''s name in vain with their proud boastings of faith and testimony to get themselve gain and impose their will on others.

[hhusted]

I must correct you! How do you figure we believe to be "abandoned" when he doesn''''t even exist period? Therefore, there''''s nothing to block. Grow up already!

Posted by Spectrum108 at 11:08 AM : Aug 24, 2007

Spectrum, you are a complete and total fool. You are more lost than anyone on this board. One day you will wish you had believed in God. I guarantee that. Open your Bible and start reading.