The Republicans' Divine Comedy

The New Republic: Giuliani Stands Aside As Pious GOP Hopefuls Take Swipes At Each Other

(The New Republic)  This column was written by Michelle Cottle.

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Now let's see if I've got this straight: This week, an Iowa pastoral supporter of Republican POTUS wannabe, ex-Arkansas governor, and ordained Baptist minister Mike Huckabee was caught e-mailing around disparaging remarks about rival Senator Sam Brownback's conversion from Methodism to Catholicism.

This comes less than two months after an Iowa field operative for Brownback was busted for sending out an e-mail talking trash about Mormonism, the faith of choice of rival Mitt Romney.

And that episode occurred only a couple of weeks after Rudy Giuilani's deputy web-campaign manager helpfully sent a blogger an article from the Utah media that tied Romney to a whacked-out prophesy asserting that a Latter Day Saint will save the Constitution.

Before even that, there was the April incident in which John McCain's campaign chairman in Warren County, Iowa, took it upon himself to share a number of illuminating tidbits about the Mormon Church (it funds Hamas, it supports Taliban-like treatment of women...) at a monthly meeting of GOP activists.

And, of course, who could forget Focus on the Family founder, conservative kingmaker, and unofficial Newt Gingrich shill James Dobson's March pronouncement that actor, lobbyist, and former Senator Fred Thompson is not a real Christian? (Culturally conservative, yes. But on the road to hell nonetheless.)

This, in turn, spurred protestations by Thompson's camp, who cited their man's lifelong standing as a Church of Christer. But that only served to spark Web debate about whether Thompson is a member of the fundamentalist Churches of Christ (as he reportedly professed) or of the more liberal United Church of Christ, in which he and wife Jeri were married in 2002. One political science professor at a Church of Christ-affiliated college went so far as to issue an online challenge, offering $100 to anyone producing evidence that Thompson had attended an assembly of the conservative sect in the past 20 years.

Wow. Talk about a tough crowd. I realize this is a religious nation, and that, more specifically, the GOP has been in hock to Christian conservatives for several elections now. Plus, the "value-voter" hysteria spurred by the 2004 exit polls has even Democratic presidential contenders brandishing their basic spiritual bona fides this time around. But the sectarian skirmishes on the Republican side are getting so vicious it's unclear whether St. Peter himself would be pure enough to escape unsullied. At this point, it wouldn't surprise me to learn that one of the more desperate campaigns had focus-grouped the idea of hosting a combination pig roast/auto-de-fé at next weekend's straw poll.

OK. I would be surprised. But not shocked.

What exactly is going on here? Sure, Mitt Romney's Latter Day Sainthood is creeping out some of the base and so makes for an irresistible target. But what of the heavy breathing over Thompson's Jesus credentials or, weirder still, Brownback's — a man so ostentatiously devout I feel the urge to genuflect every time I see him on C-SPAN. The answer to this puzzle lies in who most notably is not getting tarred in this religious war: Rudy Giuliani. I mean, if Thompson's degree of protestant zeal is of concern to a single soul, one might reasonably expect the serially unfaithful, thrice-wed, pro-gay, proudly pro-choice New Yorker — quite possibly the shabbiest Catholic in the history of the modern church — to be burned in effigy daily by the party's wingnuts.

But for now, it seems the ideologically heretical Giuliani is regarded as an entirely different animal, and so the rest of the pack is busy jockeying to be the base-friendly non-Rudy in this race. I mean, why bother picking on Giuliani's spiritual shortcomings when America's Mayor is already taking a beating for the full range of his noxiously liberal views on conservative websites like Redstate.com and RightWingNews.com? Best to set yourself up as the conservative alternative and hope that eventually Rudy goes the way of the once formidable, now barely conscious McCain campaign.

Unfortunately for the competition, there just aren't that many red meat issues by which to starkly distinguish oneself from the pack. Most everyone in this group (thanks to a few strategic adjustments by Mitt in recent years) opposes abortion and gay marriage, loves guns, and cannot wait to round up America's 12 million illegal immigrants and send them home in cattle cars. As for the war on terrorism, it's hard to get to the right of Rudy, whose entire candidacy is based on his swaggering machismo and endless reminders that he is the Big Dog who helped New York survive 9/11. Mitt Romney took a stab at out-toughing Rudy by sharing with us his presidential dream to "double" Gitmo. But since even George W. Bush is talking about disbanding the facility, Romney's grand plan doesn't make him look manly so much as confused.

This is not to say that there aren't plenty of policy differences between the guys battling for the base. But we're talking here about pressure points that play on a visceral level with the God-fearing grassroots — meaning the issue needs to involve sex, drugs or rock n' roll. Barring that, the only thing left is to play the God card. Most of the electorate will snigger and roll their eyes and dismiss it as empty pandering. But many of the GOP faithful will know exactly what you're talking about and will share your doctrinal concerns. (As noted, the Southern Baptists' chief political spokesman and Fred Thompson groupie, Richard Land, has been lecturing Mitt Romney about the need to publicly address his Mormonism if he wants to win over evangelicals.)

Such divinely inspired whispering may not be enough to dramatically alter the landscape. But these guys are short on options. And at least the strategy makes for entertaining politics, as the rest of us sit back and watch the party of moral purity kneecap its own candidates in the name of God.

[drputt45]

Politicians are crooks and liars. Democrats and Republicans and Independents are Politicians, therefore Dems, Reps and Inds are crooks and liars. How can you ever tell the difference?

[condumism]

GOP: the USA's Military Industrial Complex Party
GOP: Practices the Ideology of Fascism
GOP: the me, myself, and I party
GOP: Israel over America Party
GOP: FEAR MONGERING Party
GOP: Contempt for the Laws of the USA
GOP: War on the American People
GOP: a Regional Southern Party of WHITE TRASH
GOP: Bought and paid for by CORPORATE AMERICA!
GOP: #1 reason USA dependent on foreign oil.
GOP: Policies create the SUV!
GOP: Marijuana the same drug as Heroin.
GOP: No oversight of BIG TOBACCO!
GOP: JUST SAY NO TO STEM CELLS RESEARCH!
GOP: the NEOCON NUTT CASE party!
GOP: "PEDOPHILES R US"
GOP: the "WE HATE YOUR FREEDOM" party
GOP: US Constitution only a piece of paper
GOP: Cronyism over competence!
GOP: 40 % prefer Nazi style GOV.
GOP: It's all Bill Clinton's fault
GOP: Support needless Military bases across USA!
GOP: Perjury/Obstruction of Justice Party!
GOP: Avg. IQ of less than 89!
GOP: Privitize Social Securuty!
GOP: $8.9 TRILLION National Debt!
GOP: $500 BILLION annual Interest on US Debt.
GOP: gets all news from FASCIST FOX News channel
GOP: NO Bid Contract Party
GOP: LLC (Limited Liablity Corporation) Zero Accountability Corporation!
GOP: USA's FRAUD, WASTE and ABUSE Party!
GOP: the one issue voter party.
GOP: Illegal Wiretaps of American's

PLEEZ CONDUMMIES, refute for any of US that you are not really the American Nazi Pary in disguise.

[rayuk-2009]

The 28% who still support Bush must be totally Christian Right. Therefore, I can say with confidence:

If anyone of these poor fools make it thru the golden gates into heaven, the rest of us have nothing to worry about, guaranteed.

[kansas1946]

The Republicans remind me of the old, "My dad can beat up your dad," routine, only in this case, it is my God can beat up your God.
They are pitiful, short-sighted, un-Christian like, and laughable.

[alienateddem]

No White House Wedding for Caroline Giuliani

AP Reports:

The daughter of Republican hopeful Rudy Giuliani has signaled she's backing Democrat Barack Obama for president.

According to her Facebook profile, Giuliani's 17-year-old daughter, Caroline, belonged to Democrat Barack Obama's Facebook group "Barack Obama (One Million Strong for Barack)." She left the group Monday morning after the online magazine Slate sent an inquiry.

Her profile can be viewed by Facebook users who have access to New York City's Trinity School or Harvard University networks. Caroline, who is Giuliani's daughter with his second wife, Donna Hanover, recently graduated from Trinity and will attend Harvard in the fall.

Slate posted a screen shot of her profile, which uses a slightly different last name. She lists herself as having liberal political views.

Giuliani, campaigning in Iowa, declined to comment on his daughter's political preference.


GOP-Americans want a White House Wedding. It doesn't appear that the Bush Twins will provide one. Therefore, it appears logical that the next GOP Presidential Candidate debate forum should include a discussion of whose daughters will remain faithful to the classic Family Values dog-and-pony-show.

[rushlimpdrug]

Edwards hair looked good and obama does have big ears even though they are not to be mentioned.
Posted by janem4

So the ideal candidate would have bad hair and small ears.
I will begin the search.
Should make a nice reality show.

[aaabee-2009]

This is the most biased and inconsequential article I have read yet about the Republicans. How absurd and discriminatory" Posted by jack3213 at 08:58 AM : Aug 06, 2007

Is anyone as sick of moral hypocrisy as I am?

Why is any negativity about the GOP and its Christian base bias and inconsequential? There are valid points in this article.

Rush Limbaugh and company are just as bias and inconsequential, but they continue on with no squack from Jack3213 and the other 28%.

Mr. Thompson's Christianity is a matter between him and God, not the GOP. This is what happens when a relationship with God is reduced to 1-hour Christianity on Sundays and on Monday, back to business as usual, where God plays no part in one's life other than a face mask over the usual human evils.

Pretty soon we will all be praying to the new trinity: Dobson,Limbaugh,and the Holy GOP.

Judge not, unless you are a Republican? The Chistian Right needs to be playing this game with higher standards and morals than the average man. But they are by far the least forgiving, the least humble, the least servitude-spirited. Dobson leads the wolf-pack, bearing his cross and his moral millions down to the wide gate.

Republicans need to remember something about removing the plank in their own eye before removing the speck in their brother's eye. And before you jumb on me, they are the ones who claim to speak for God, liberals do not.

[tejasdemo]

Republicans are crooks and liars.

[random_radar]

If there were a possibility of a Republican candidate winning the election, then people would be anxious to rally around a reasonable candidate. But since the election will be won by a Democrat, then people feel free to wage a partisan fight over who ought to be approved. If you know you are going to lose, you might as well battle for idealogical purity as a pyric victory.

[elz523]

So, lib pundits, how would you call that? Thisis so typical and comical. See, all of them are a comedy and not very divine. The whole pack of them. And by the way, I thought hill looked a bit dowdy in her pink jacket at the snowman debate.
Edwards hair looked good and obama does have big ears even though they are not to be mentioned.
Posted by janem4 at 06:49 AM : Aug 06, 2007

Hey Janem4, this came from the New Republic who tends to fry both sides. What you want to read, if there is only one point of view that you wish to view, is the vacous garbage that comes from the National Review. CBS posts its fair share of that con rag everyday.

[elz523]

I have started viewing Christianity in a whole different light thanks to that election and so have a lot of other people I know!
Posted by grumpas at 09:17 AM : Aug 06, 2007

That is the biggest danger the right wing Christians have brought on themselves. They have complained for a long time that they were being persecuted. They were mostly never right in the past, at least on any grand scale. With their attempt to run the lives and shove thier religion down the throats of all the other citizens of the United States they have invited a persectuion that didn't exist before they started to imagine it.

[ubikvalis2]

As an agnostic, I know I'm in the minority by thinking how weird it is that in order to get elected in this country you have to profess belief in a magical being that is all around us, but who no one has every proved existed. From my point of view, having the most powerful nation helmed by someone with irrational delusions is not a good thing.

We have "seperation" of church and state, but lets remember how people in government freaked out because ONE SINGLE Congressman out of 535 is not a Christian, Muslim or Jew.

[clestes-2009]

The reps are grasping at straws!! Losing it!!!They are really having a tough time trying to distingush between themselves.

Frankly, I don't see a hairs breath of difference between the whole lot with the except of Rudy G who is the LEAST qualified candidate for president that ever existed.

They are all playing to the extreme right, who are the SMALLEST GROUP of the republican voters. But because they are surely the loudest, they have to be pandered to?????????

That leaves the MAJORITY of the republican voters out in left field (no pun intended) with no one they feel comfortable voting for because everyone is pretty tired of the "FAITH-BASED" thinking that led us to this dismal spot!!

I think hordes of republicans, who voted for Bush, are going to vote democratic in 2008. The republican party is just a complete mess and I do not think they will straightened anything out between now and election time.

Now if Ron Paul were to through his hat in, it might make a difference, but he is way toooo sensible and smart for the republican party chosen boy.

Jeezzz, I have front row seats to the biggest comedy in town, which is going to play on between now and the republican primary!!!!!

What a bunch of doofus's!!!!

[ianlou]

What I find strange about evangelical religion is that, when any other large organization or political movement's leader falls in disgrace, the organization itself normally falls; With evangelicals, all the fallen leaders
(Jim Bakker, Jim Jones, Tilton, Swaggart and Haggart) are "forgiven for their sins" and a new scoundrel steps up to take his place. Evangelicals seem to treat their political candidates the same way; anything can be forgiven as long as you ask God for forgiveness. (after your caught)

[grumpas]

That blew my mind completely in 2004 when so called 'value voters' (aka Christian's) turned out in droves to vote the most immoral man on the planet back into office on the grounds of morals! It seems to me the average Christian has totally lost sight of what the words moral's and value's really means. They seem to have the misguided notion that moral's begins and ends with ***, abortion and ***. The last time I was in church lying, cheating and stealing were considered moral infractions of the highest order. But, I guess in the fundamentalist world they are no longer considered to be wrong. At least, none of them seem to have much against unbridled corruption. I have started viewing Christianity in a whole different light thanks to that election and so have a lot of other people I know!

[bombadil4]

It's depressing on every level--depressing that we have such lightweight nincompoops (especially on the Republican side)vying to be President--depressing that the god squads slithering around the country have enough influence and cash to make candidates dance a macabre jig to their ignorant and bigoted tune--depressing that all this clap-trap overshadows the vital work that needs to be done to get this country out of the mess that will be left behind by the moron Shrub.

[jack3213]

This is the most biased and inconsequential article I have read yet about the Republicans. How absurd and discriminatory to show nothing but negativity for these candidates, for the exception of Giuliani, which happens to be the best option thus far. I realize there are people who will disagree, but once they realize it isn't a game and those who can make a differance will and those who only make empty promise's- cannot, then the right person will lead the country for a change.

[formrusmcsgt]

And still not anything about hill, johnny & obama ....
Posted by janem4 at 06:49 AM : Aug 06, 2007

Probably because the article is about Repub candidates janem4, which apparently is beyond your ability to perceive.

[ioweign]

In the financial world, columnists/commentators are required to disclose their ownership in the stock of any companies they comment on. It would be refreshing to see the same by Michelle Cottle that she is a proud, unabashed, atheist liberal, so we can put her article in context. Instead, we must deduce this based on the context of her piece. How about it, Michelle? In the interest of full disclosure, what are your political and religious (if any) affiliations??

Posted by erichsh at 07:21 PM : Aug 05, 2007



erichsh -

We have Separation of Church and State - so it really doesn't matter does it!

[elz523]

In the financial world, columnists/commentators are required to disclose their ownership in the stock of any companies they comment on. It would be refreshing to see the same by Michelle Cottle that she is a proud, unabashed, atheist liberal, so we can put her article in context. Instead, we must deduce this based on the context of her piece. How about it, Michelle? In the interest of full disclosure, what are your political and religious (if any) affiliations??

Posted by erichsh at 07:21 PM : Aug 05, 2007
_______________________


I am a leftist Christian and I think that a right wing Christian is a misnomer. I also think, as does Michelle, that it is wonderful to watch these self-righteous fools battle it out to be the most pious.