X-Rated Internet Addiction

Pornography Is As Private As Your Own PC, And Can Become An Obsession

(CBS)  Mark Searles is a family man, an insurance inspector, a devout Christian — and a recovering Internet porn addict.

"It's just you and the computer; there is no one to tell you no," Searles told CBS News science and technology correspondent Daniel Sieberg.

Searles says for nearly a year he would sneak onto his home computer and indulge his fantasies — for several hours at a time.

"What I'm doing I know is wrong, but it kind of pulls you in," he said. "When you become an addict, you forget everything else. All reasoning gets put way on the back burner."

But Searles' dirty little secret was exposed one day when his wife discovered some of the Web sites he'd been surfing.

"I was a combination of sad and angry and disappointed and hurt," Kim Searles said.

The world of pornography has clearly changed. Buying porn used to mean risking embarrassment. Today, porn is consumed in private, online, by an estimated 40 million Americans.

Addiction to Internet porn often isn't dealt with simply because nobody wants to talk about it — which means they often don't get help. But now, thanks to one group, people are starting to talk about it — in places like a church in Fort Wayne, Ind., over breakfast.

The gathering is called "porn and pancakes." Men come to get help for themselves and others, or just out of curiousity.

"We wanted to create a safe place where people can go to get help and realize they're not the only ones," said youth minister Craig Gross.

Gross founded a virtual ministry, xxxchurch.com. He takes his traveling road show to churches across the country. Using his skills as a pastor, along with some slick videos, Craig hammers home the ills of porn.

"We think that there's a world that's kinda gone astray when it comes to this industry and we wanna talk to you," Gross preaches.

Some people just want to head off problems before they start. At the church in Fort Wayne, two fathers brought their teenage sons.

"It’s going to come into your life. If you don't think it will, you're just kidding yourself," said Jim Villers. "If you think it's not going to come into your kid's life, you're kidding yourself."

How common is it for your friends to be surfing porn online or on a cell phone?

"Oh, it's like every day," said Villers' son Skyler.

Ironically, people are seeking help online, at sites like one from the University of Texas. Another solution: Installing Internet monitoring software so someone you trust can keep track of the Web sites you visit.

Mark Searles didn't have high-tech help. He says his wife has helped him remain clean, and his son has already learned a lesson about how harmful Internet porn can be.

"It's very humbling to have a 9-year-old tell a 37-year-old man, 'Dad that's wrong.' Because even at nine years old, he knows that's bad," he says.

It's all part of bringing a difficult subject into the open.

[mygramma]

This is a crock as far as I am concerned. There may be such a thing as internet porn addiction or even *** addiction in general. I haven't seen any evidence of it. But even so, so what? Nobody ever got hurt by it except within the confines of their own minds, or that of their families, who are threatened by anything sexual, particularly in relation to some twisted interpretation of whosever religion.

I have been interacting with porn since the 1960s in one form or another and currently on the internet to the tune of about 20 hours a week. Nobody gets hurt or killed there, unlike in the mediated video gaming industry products sold to our young people. Among the wannabe porn purveyors, you have perverts who try to engage in child pornography or unspeakable acts of violence. But that is not the porn industry. I have never seen any of it, but I have read about it, and it needs to be prosecuted severely.

I love good porn, and lots of it. Anything that can turn me on like well done porn has my vote. And the vote of my two daughters aged 29 and 38 who have healthy, normal *** lives.

Porn addiction? Bring it on! Prosecute the real purveyors of porn, the video gaming industry that traps teenagers into continuous exposure to violence and leads some to massacre children and adults at schools and colleges. There is nothing inherently wrong with porn. Get over it.

[matter77]

mygramma, you're a liar.

[mygramma]

matter77, you said I'm a liar. Where's the lie? Make sense or get off. I said it like I see it and like I do it. There's nothing wrong with porn. And no, nvhorseman, I don't have an obsessive compulsive mind, and I don't see what that has to do with simply enjoying good porn. Where in Nevada, by the way?

[mcvet]

Here we go again. The coffers of the Religious Reich must not be full enough... now they will most certainly want to tell me what I can and can not do in my OWN home in my OWN time. I know it..it's coming to you THIS sunday morning from your friendly Preacher. We all should have been so lucky as to have President Bush reading some Porn instead of trying to read and understand intel reports. A lot of our kids would be home today! Sieg Heil and Amen.

[booyaw_77]

How could anybody eat and talk about porn? Holy macaronni. Thats like muffdiving and childbirth.

[gary4books]

The real interest is to control political speech. However many use porn as an excuse to start regulation of the Internet. I doubt that they care about porn at all. All they have to do in convince us that violating our rights is something we want.

People interested in food have cooking shows. What is so diffeent about ***?

[davidwayne20]

I realy don't understand this hole thing.
How can they say porn is bad? to who? I average 10-20 hrs a week on line and it's NO BIG DEAL. I am not cheating, i am not going to a gentlemans club and getting drunk. you can touch there, on line it's just you and the PC. who gets hurt? how is it bad? i just don't get these RIGHT WING nuts who think having *** is evil! In my state these people are trying to shut down VIP adult stores. why? are they threatened by their own lack of ***uality?
oh my!

[infidel_us]

As a society, we're all just sooooo much better off since this stuff is protected "free speech." Thank you liberal supreme court justices!

Ruined lives, ruined families, drug use, disease.....all directly or indirectly porn induced. I personally have known people at work who have been fired over their web porn activities. People who say there is nothing wrong with pornography are mental midgets.

[itwasntme000]

Ruined lives, ruined families, drug use, disease.....all directly or indirectly porn induced. I personally have known people at work who have been fired over their web porn activities. People who say there is nothing wrong with pornography are mental midgets.
Posted by Infidel_US at 08:42 AM : May 02, 200

Drug use??? so next time i download a vid from the internet, it could lead to me getting snorting some coke or shooting up heroin??? yeeeaaa kookoo kookoo

I am assuming you are a religious person and that is what your basis of hate here is. The only family it can harm is a religous one where the woman freaks out, or if she is a prude.

[antoniof123]

I am so sick of this *** if you can not take responsibility for your own action then you are taking up valuable oxgen that someone else could be breathing and you are releasing CO2 into the air so shut up and leave this alone.

[infidel_us]

Drug use??? so next time i download a vid from the internet, it could lead to me getting snorting some coke or shooting up heroin???
Posted by itwasntme000 at 09:01 AM : May 02, 2007

Yep, mental midget. Some of the people IN IT AND MAKING IT......not the pervs watching it! My motto: "Judge not least ye be judged." I personally don't care what you do in the privacy of your own home.....you can whack-off till you go blind! :)

[davidwayne20]

"don't care what you do in the privacy of your own home.....you can whack-off till you go blind! :)

Posted by Infidel_US at 09:07 AM : May 02, 2007"

you WONT go blind, i know from experience!

[itwasntme000]

Yep, mental midget. Some of the people IN IT AND MAKING IT......not the pervs watching it! My motto: "Judge not least ye be judged." I personally don't care what you do in the privacy of your own home.....you can whack-off till you go blind! :)
Posted by Infidel_US at 09:07 AM : May 02, 2007

AHHH, theirs the religion in you. And you are talking about a mental midget???? I truly feel sorry for you and your etheral god addiction. You have such a narrow view of the world that even trying to educate you on things of science would go upon deaf ears.
You should try openening your eyes before you begin to attack others.

[itwasntme000]

And antoniof123 you of all people should not be talking about worthless people and the wasted oxygen they use, for we know that you swing the opposite way which is truely a waste of life.

[flyguy81]

Liberals quickly play the "rights" card, but yet they forget a couple very important principles that our country is founded upon. 1. Our Founding Fathers made it clear that rights are not absolute--they can't be. It is impossible. 2. That is why our Supreme Court--a long time ago--determined that our rights can be restricted if there is a good enough reason. Is there a good enough reason to not restrict internet porn?

[davidwayne20]

"Is there a good enough reason to not restrict internet porn?
Posted by FlyGuy81 at 09:38 AM : May 02, 2007"

yes Flyguy81 there is good enough reason, internet porn hurts no one!
so leave porn alone

[tech0011]

How powerful is porn?
Answer for yourself.

Can you remember the first time you seen pornography? How much detail of that image can you recall?

Now, can you remember the news from two nights ago with the same detail?

[andrew_693]

it seems likes there is a connection between christians, porn, gay cruising, lying, invading countries, murdering, *** pages, cheating on your spouse, giving jobs to your girlfriends, ......why not ban republicanism and christianity.

[itwasntme000]

How powerful is porn?
Answer for yourself.

Can you remember the first time you seen pornography? How much detail of that image can you recall?

Now, can you remember the news from two nights ago with the same detail?
Posted by Tech0011 at 09:46 AM : May 02, 2007


I have no clue about any details about the first time i seen a porno. except i am sure she had huge knockers.
U mean E news??? yea pam anderson was on their talking about her new movie. "look at me I float in the water"

[tech0011]

I have no clue about any details about the first time i seen a porno. except i am sure she had huge knockers.
U mean E news??? yea pam anderson was on their talking about her new movie. "look at me I float in the water"
Posted by itwasntme000 at 11:16 AM : May 02, 2007


I didn't know that children could post!?!?

[jolsonbear]

Porn doesn't kill people...

S*e*x*u*a*l*l*y frustrated religious zealots do.

[jolsonbear]

Yes our fondling fathers did make it clear that rights are not absolute....some do it with their left hand!

[dbish1970]

I don't think this has anything to do with religion or freedom of speech at all. What does need to be stated are the facts at hand. I know that porn can get out of hand with certain ages and personality types but I have watched it and don't believe that it should be banned. It's about education. Porn can be devastating in that some people can get addicted. They don't mean that everyone who watches it will become addicted either. When it interferes with your job and day to day functioning it poses a problem just like anything else can. Porn addiction can be compared to drug addiction because the addict starts with one look, then it overpowers them to the point that they are looking at things and doing things that they never would have before...it's just like a "drug high".

[sedandara]

My perspective is that of a wife that witnessed our children losing their father to hours upon hours of internet porn, and the loss of almost any intimacy in our marriage because *** became a thing you do, not based in love for each other. This addiction caused him to lie in other areas of his life to cover for himself. We are still together after 28 years and the only thing that has allowed this is my faith that God will heal our marriage from the lies and deception, but I don't know that I will ever fully trust him again. We all have to be responsible for our behavior, but to say that internet porn doesn't hurt anyone is ridiculous - just ask my now adult children how they feel about it.

[sedandara]

My perspective is that of a wife that witnessed our children losing their father to hours upon hours of internet porn, and the loss of almost any intimacy in our marriage because *** became a thing you do, not based in love for each other. This addiction caused him to lie in other areas of his life to cover for himself. We are still together after 28 years and the only thing that has allowed this is my faith that God will heal our marriage from the lies and deception, but I don't know that I will ever fully trust him again. We all have to be responsible for our behavior, but to say that internet porn doesn't hurt anyone is ridiculous - just ask my now adult children how they feel about it.

[itwasntme000]

I didn't know that children could post!?!?
Posted by Tech0011 at 11:52 AM : May 02, 2007

The question was for your own benefit.
A stupid question deserves a stupid answer.

[cadmantwo]

Porn addict? Show me the person laying on the floor, sick, shaking and vomiting because they don't have any porn! Not that some people don't have trouble dealing with some things, but "porn addiction" is an excuse not an addiction. When are we going to give up these lame addictions and start dealing with the real problems behind the behavior? (Which, by the way, may have something to do with living in the most s*xually charged and simultaneously s*xually repressive country in the world.)

Hmmm... I wonder if "s*xually" will make it past the repressive censorship used on this site...

[dbish1970]

I can't show you a "porn addict laying on the floor, sick, shaking and vomiting", but I can show you many who have lost their jobs, money, wife and family because of their obsessive compulsion (addiction). I can also show you many who are in jail or on the sexual predator list because the problem led them there. I think that they are completely responsible for their own actions just as any addict. Again, I will say it is about education as well as responsibility. I suppose the two go hand in hand. We do live in a sexually charged world which is why people need to make responsible choices for themselves as to what they can or cannot handle. The same goes for alcohol, prescription and non-prescription drugs or anything that can be abused for that matter.

[dbish1970]

I do also agree that there is almost always a deep seeded issue or real problem behind the behavior. It typically stems from abuse as a child.

[michellem99-2009]

LOCK UP ALL THE SEXUAL PREDIATORS AND GET OFF THEM OFF THE STREETS FOR LIFE.Don't blame it on your being abused as a child.I am not buying it and I will never will. I was abused as a child by those who were supposed to be my caretakers. So don't tell me any different. That bloody porn and men who won't control their drives. Who would rather hurt and mess up children and women.This a board where I hope you men who view porn who think it is so cool when it is not. IT IS DOWN RIGHT NASTY AND HURTFUL. I HATE PORN. We need to pass strong laws that deals with this issue. We who these men abuse did not ask for it. THEY FORCE IT ON US. This is a problem to must be stopped. I am stepping upto the plate here to tell you men to not ever get in to porn. It is not worth it. IS IS WORTH GOING TO PRISOM OVER,YOUR CHILDREN TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU,RUITING YOUR LIFE OVER? I hope not.

[zoltaric]

I love porn.

Wish they had the internet when I was 15!