Wedding Gift Registry: Charity

What More Engaged Couples Are Asking Of Wedding Guests

(CBS)  The latest request at many weddings these days hasn't been for presents at all.

With the average ages of brides and grooms today at 27 and 29 respectively, many have all the dishes and bedding they need. So instead of asking for china and crystal, The Early Show contributor Laurie Hibberd reports, they're asking their guests to donate to charity.

When Christina Giallourakis and Aakash Thakkar got married this spring, they were actually excited that half of their wedding guests did not buy them gifts.

Thakkar explains, "We had sort of tried to, in planning for our wedding, to sort of get the basics that we need. Sure, maybe we didn't have sort of all the toasters and silverware and plates, et cetera, that one might need. But I think, our general thought was we could buy that stuff along the way."

Instead, this Washington, D.C., couple asked their friends and family to help start a scholarship fund at Thakkar's high school alma mater.

He says, "The thought was to start a scholarship that would be perpetual, and would allow a disadvantaged child in the Washington, D.C., area to be able to go to St. John's College High School."

And they're not the only ones to forgo presents for charity. The trend has grown in the last few years, with a number of high-profile celebrity couples, including Billy Joel and his wife, Katie, setting the example.

"I don't think we ever considered asking our friends to buy us gifts," Katie Joel says. "My husband and I were really on the same page when it came to this issue. We wanted to have charity donations for the wedding from the beginning. I got a lot of feedback from different friends saying, 'It's great that you chose to give to charities, instead of asking for gifts. We don't want to buy you a coffee pot'."

Kara Corridan, executive editor of Modern Bride magazine, notes, "Over the past few years, couples may donate the unused food from their reception to a local food bank, or they'll print their invitations and their stationery on recycled paper. Or instead of giving favors to guests, they'll tell them that they made a donation to their favorite charity."

Bethany Robertson is the executive director of the I Do Foundation, a non-profit organization that helps couples incorporate charity into their big day.

Roberts says, "We have seen a phenomenal increase in the number of couples who are participating. In 2004, we had about 20,000 couples in the program. And this year, we're on track to have over 200,000 couples choose a charity through either the I Do Foundation or one of our partners. This is money that did not currently or before exists in the charitable pipeline. This is money that was being spent on cake toppers and garter belts. Now, it's being used for children's health or for community development, things like that. I kind of think of it as icing on the cake, really."

Experts say it makes sense that this trend is on the rise with couples waiting longer - and until they're older - before walking down the aisle.

Corridan says, "I think now because we have more couples who have been living together before they get married, they literally just don't need the stuff that would end up on a traditional registry, or they may live separately, and so, they might end up with two sets of everything going in to setting up their home."

For couples like Christina Giallourakis and Aakash Thakkar, who are tying charitable giving into the day they tie the knot, they say it makes all the difference.

"I think it made our wedding better," Giallourakis says. "There was that much more interaction with all of our guests before the wedding. It wasn't they just went to a Web site and bought a gift and that was it. It was: How's the fund doing? Where are you up to now?"

And Robertson is hoping that more and more people think of those less fortunate while planning for their own futures.

She says, "The I Do Foundation's vision is really that in 10 years, when someone comes back from a wedding, people will say, 'What did the bridesmaids' dresses look like? Who was the best man? And what was the couple's charity?'"

If you're wondering how much money can actually be raised like this, so far Giallourakis and Thakkar's scholarship fund has raised about $8,000.