Masterpiece Up For Bid

Inspired By Christo, Columnist Looks For His Inner Artist

(CBS)  The following is a weekly 60 Minutes II commentary by columnist Steve Hartman. It was first broadcast on Feb. 16, 2005.

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Inside this box is a piece of art –- a piece of conceptual art that I concepted about six years ago.

Friends who’ve seen it say it’s actually quite bad, which is, of course, how it ended up in a box.

But now, I’m wondering if maybe I should give it a second chance, especially after seeing this giant orange car wash, or whatever it is they just put up in Central Park.

The artist Christo calls it “The Gates.”

I can't do a painting, but this kind of thing, I think I can do it.
I'm pretty sure that I once created conceptual art.

This is my masterpiece: a wrinkled T-shirt that I found at a men’s clothing store. What inspired me to frame it was the price tag: $180. I asked the salesman why so much, and he said, "because the wrinkles don't come out."

The wrinkles don’t come out. I stared into those wrinkles and saw a work of art.

I wrote about it that night in my journal: "For the first time ever, I decided I had discovered art. All my life, I’d been told that art is something that forces you to think, makes a statement, evokes emotion. The pricey piece in front of me did all that."

So, I bought it and framed it. But did I make art or not?

To find out, I went to Artforum magazine, the Bible of the art world.
The publisher is Knight Landesman. He doesn’t normally critique emerging artists, but he made an exception for me.

Hartman: Take a look, take it all in. Let me know what you think.

Landesman: It’s a nice piece of art. You could hang it with pride.

Hartman: Would you hang it in your house?

Landesman: No. It wouldn't appeal to me. It's not colorful enough. I'm a lover of color.

Hartman: You don't like white necessarily?

Landesman: Yeah, I don't. ... I think it's a good beginning, and it's all it is.

Obviously, Landesman was trying to let me down gently and I was about to pack it in, when I picked up a copy of Artforum, and just happened to see an ad for an art show.

"You should go see the show," says Landesman.

I did.

How much did one piece of art, a white piece of clothing, cost? $22,000.

There, I found the answer to my question. It turns out a white undergarment is not art. Art is a white undergarment in a box next to a funnel.

Still, I’m not convinced my T-shirt is totally without artistic merit.

That’s why I decided to take bids on eBay. All proceeds go to charity.

And if we get enough response, maybe next year, they’ll let me cover Central Park -- with one great big wrinkled T-shirt.